the computer said to me not to smile so that is my trying not to smile massively stupid scowl look for the how old you will be in 50 years photo that i look ridiculously ug-city in so i am not bothering to post it because i do not agree at all with the science centre’s predictions of how my face will be aging.

in other news, it snowed last nite/early morning today and i woke up about 6 20 am and thought of a bunch of stuff to keep my mind occupied ’til maybe 9am after i was like FUCK THIS and had a bit of a cigarette and some oj and it woke up the cat and then it woke up fil because the cat purrs like a lawnmower and sits on my face until you feed him or put him in the bathroom for a time-out.

i called my mum last nite to ask her what she wanted for xmas and she said body shop stuff that’s all she wants and i said don’t you want something substantial that you can keep or something and remember like how i buy everyone kitschy stuff that they don’t need that just sits around collecting dust and when visitors come over they are like woah totally COOL and useless!

being practical, well, buying practically is sooooooooooo stressful and at this point in my life i just can’t deal with stress, well, not that i can’t deal with it, i just totally refuse to deal with that shit altogether unless i am playing burnout on xbox and i have to cause a huge car accident to make lots of car accident money, this is the only stress i will allow for the time being oh and helping people when they email me with advice on life like i invented living.

blep.

fil tripped me yesterday when the centre was closing and it was fucking hilarious so i couldn’t get too mad over it, dammit. i flew and my purse flew even further and fil is lucky that it was on a carpetted floor. focker.

so everyone i am moving back to toronto, the land of snobportunity, social anxiety, and colorful scarves.

i can’t wait to be broke over there and boss around ward and finally allow myself to be startrek-washed but only because I am choosing the ikea-shit.

and all of it.

Nevertheless this is what I see every couple days. If

you’ll excuse me I’m gonna go write a term paper because I’m not very bright

and think writing something when I’m drunk is a good idea

kurious

angelo took this over the summer for his photography class in this cute little park just before the sun disappeared and no i am not all that skinny i am totally suckin’ it in ‘cos i was drinking water a lot and eating an orange and one of angelo’s classmates was taking my picture too and making all these pervy comments to hisself and it was fucking hilarious and uncomfortable and flattering all at the same time.

it’s no wonder i was so bored in highschool what with all those windows in my classrooms and me just having to look at them, out them – i guess i am the forever daydreamer, nitedreamer.

i don’t even have an attention span for my attention span.

i’ve been trying to read this kurt vonnegut book since august and now it’s december it’s so damn sketchy i may as well be reading my own blog. fuck.

i can’t stop looking out the window at the street.

being in this coffeespot and watching this nervous old guy wait to come alive for this older woman to join him makes me feel both nervous for him and excited for her because it is friday nite near christmastime and anything is possible for them.

i remember when i lived in maine there was this teacher-type guy having a sandwich/coffee with a hot young student girl in this fancy deli and he was being all important talking/guiding this girl through life or whatever who was a poor student i guess and he was talking all loud and jeff and i were making comments to each other about the stephen king look a like and then when jeff went to the bathroom the teacher went a minute afterward and totally went mental on the door, slamming and banging on it – unable to put two-and-two together that someone might possibly be in there already and that’s why the door is locked.

talk about a complete personality-change.

everyone please bring their fat old cousins to clinton’s so i can dance with them and listen/see the HOUSEPLANTS tonite. Clinton’s is on bloor, on the south side, east of the christie pitts park, for those of you who are dumb and also for all you scenesters who are like yah thanks duh we know where that place is already you fucking moron. anyway. THE HOUSEPLANTS are that jazzy bluesy crap that everyone is all into right now and all of it sounds the same but the difference is with this band, they are actually accomplished and good, i suppose.

i would put the flyer up but i think writing about it is more intimate like we are holding hands and discussing Thelma and Louise.

oh and if i don’t show up don’t take it too personally just be greatful that i told you about something you could be doing tonite that is cheap and think of it as a pre-going to some place or other thing to do that isn’t on college street like all those other trying hard to be the cavern club it spots right now at the same time. whatever.

that was sort of in english, right?

oh yeh it’s 5 dollars at the door.

WHAT FIVE DOLLARS!?

yep.

Where were you working? what were you doing?

I was supposed to get laid off in August and get 120K in severance… but now I’m going to be working for another year…that seems like a lot of cash but I sat down with a financial advisor and found with the debts I have and my boutique yuppie loft I could only really go surfing in Costa Rica (or something like that for no more than 5 months and my financial little ‘house of cards’ would fall to the ground.

Last spring I joined a band with a bunch of other geezers and actors as a keyboard player, mostly because I needed something to do other than contribute to the 8 years of alcohol I’d been experiencing. They had some deal where they were going to China to be big Rock Stars. We did about 15 gigs throughout the summer (mostly at the Drake Hotel and we were supposed to leave on November 14th, Our promoters in China couldn’t get a permit for the biggest province so it all got postponed until March 17th, I got the news on my birthday, four days before we were to fly. I was pretty depressed and hid from the world for about two weeks, but I think I’m over it now. The band is called The New Black and like everyone we have a cheesy Website (www.thenewblack.ca)….

I joined the band specifically to got China, now I have to hang out with them and take their stupid phone calls for another 4 months!

literally haven’t travelled anywhere in 2 years mostly because I always had this severance dangled in front of me like a carrot – and I thought I might as well wait for that and travel in style.

where have you been, what have you been up to? I checked out your blog when I got your note…it looks as if the world of Raymi has gotten a little more subdued…nothing wrong with that. you’re not going mainstream are you?

do you have a boyfriend these days?

and when you talk about coming back to Toronto – where are you now?

p

dude the new black is the gayest name ever but it’s funny at the same

time because young people like me will go bwahaha at it and geezers

like yer target audience will be all impressed by it. i am putting

your email on my blog and linking to your site. i am trying to go

mainstream but not really. i just want to put out a book that is

different than what all the other bloggers are doing. i am living in

the burbs right now. are u in toronto? yes i have a bf. find me a good

place to live. sucks to be u and that whole china thing.

tony realised that if you want to be a success you have to write all the time about scandallous crap and then you have to put it in a book and sell it and make money so he can eat tacos and have young girls come over to look at his mixed-ethnicity and weird twinkle lites and then you have to get raymi to interview you and totally not give a shit about any of it because now raymi is like a senior in the highschool world of blogging and it is like she is never going to graduate so she just hangs around and bullies people.

so here is the interview.

he called me a barfly and i completely lost it.

do you have the case for this cd? no, i threw it out.

tell them why to laugh.

a grab bag of entertainment what is my purse.

luane writhe is an anagram for my real name. i’m so lucky.

last nite at band practise i didn’t spill any beer. i am getting better in that department though i still yank shit out of the PA, what with all those cords and wires and plugs and me being hyper ‘n all.

i have random email addresses written all over the place and i have to think really hard to remember how they got there and why i have them and what i was suppose to say to that person/s.

hitler-riffic

some of us have peaked and we are annoyed that the rest haven’t.

trying, raising, and breeding the next generation of elite and we’re fucking up all over the place.

i saw the bridget jones movie and i sobbed and sobbed because i do believe in romantic moments though too bad i am skeptic of romantically-ever-after endings.

we are always expecting pain.

emerge hooks me up. tonite i’m going to see feist. you guys should go too. they have this one song i play all the time where the chick is all, “your kisses taste like honey…” and so on and i am like LETS HEAR IT AGAIN GUYS!

anyway, feist are/is playing tonite at the phoenix and i know it is complete last minute i am telling you now (if you didn’t already know already) but this is how it works in the i am afraid of stalkers wanting to harm me blogosphere but i still want people to go where i go regardless…dur dur dur.

oh and my hair is fixed. and it was expensive and took 5 hours. and now my head is a rainbow of brown and black and blond and another shade of blond and it makes the bags under my eyes stand out more which is, great.