merkley???: hi raymi the minx i had dinner with three laurens last night my world is filled with laurens but only one raymi
me: hahahaa are they pronounced loren or luhren like me
merkley???: i dont pronounce your name luhren
me: well thats how it is
merkley???: luhren is that how your mom says it? i’d never call you lauren anyway it’s only raymi as far as i’m concerned
me: yes raymi is good but luh-ren is how my parents say it it was their choice
merkley???: they were obviously drunk i actually think i tend to pronounce that name more like lawren which is how it looks but i am highly evolved
me: its a combo hybrid of luh and law
merkley???: i’m between law and lor with a smidge of luh i think you’d let my natural pronunciation fly
me: i would not
merkley???: thats cuz you arent laid back
me: people who call me lauren do so condescendingly like they have an “in” with me no if my name is pronounced a certain way my entire life i cant just make allowances
merkley???: thats like when people think they are being cute and they call me dave
me: like eastern euros have weird ways to say katarina
merkley???: those people are not clever
me: KATA-reeeeeeeeeeena they get really mad if u fuck it up wow dave thats not even remotely funny
merkley???: but they say it like they found out a big secret and they are instantly dropped off my to do list
me: dave is your real name?
merkley???: its my first name
me: but yeah thats how people say lauren to me too
merkley???: i bet
me: like they are super smart
merkley???: meanwhile we think — idiot one time this girl was going — “i know your name is DAVE, so i’m gonna call you DAVE – and i said well i’m gonna call you CUMFART! and i still call her cumfart when i see her
me: HA does she get mad
merkley???: well she doesnt bug me much thats for sure nobody wants to be called cumfart in front of friends
me: hahaha im doing my archives thing and came across this gem, remember it: ok what did one chandelier say to another?
is chandel ‘ier (here)?
merkley???: i dont remember that
me: you commented and said yes you are definitely drunk still
merkley???: i’m good at quips
me: ha ha — you’re so drunk. those are drunk jokes. aka not funny when you’re not drunk, hilarious when you are. merkley??? | Edit comment Delete comment | Email | Homepage | 07.14.07 – 12:25 pm | #
yeah they’re borderline dad jokes too i just laid down for a bit and watched some of a league of their own and cried to it twice, two sad parts in a row and now i don’t feel nauseous anymore. is chandel here? AHHAHAHAHHAHAA raymi | Edit comment Delete comment | Email | Homepage | 07.14.07 – 12:25 pm | #
me: cid is on my arm i am typing with my left hand it is annoying as hell
scott is a loud talker so when he had to make a phonecall i told him to go in the bedroom cos i knew the fucking fred penner acoustic guitar playing neighbour asshole would appreciate the deep tone of scott’s voice coming through the wall.
then i say what is wrong with you and he says no what is wrong with you!? NOTHING WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU etc.
our waitress blew, not until she realised i had “connections” with her employer did she stop blowing. some frozen grapes were sent over and she is like uh these are for you and do you know why? with loads of attitude, like it was a test – way to be professional.
she got up to dance near me and whipped me in the face and back of the head with her amazon hair a few times, thanks.
if i were to somehow meet rihana and she had her umbrella, could i like, demand to stand under it with her, is her song like a mutually binding-contract if i buy it off itunes?
mine, note the cardboard. i wasn’t planning to eat it all in one sitting, fil helped, then gave me a WICKED COOL LECTURE about recycling!
me: are you going to pick wildflowers and water them with rainwater and drink rainwater from your satchel canteen that is covered in oldschool army tarp
oh man i am dying of laughter right now and i am crying can’t breathe that video never tires.
i am going to draw a picture in MS paint to represent the sadness brb.
i am smirking like an imp because this dude is all up in fil’s space telling him how to take pictures and he just wouldn’t shut the fuck up or detect that he was annoying the shit out of us.
the most annoying thing about nerd magnet bands is the type of nerds that come out, they think they own the band and fuck you if you get in the way
I AM A DRAGON YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR ME LANCELIONIVAT YOUR TRICKSY SPELLS ARE FUTILE AGAINST MY GREEN BALL OF WRATH WREEEEEUUUURAWR!
jesus christ where do you think you are, put your shoes back on you gross losers, this isn’t your playroom!
you can always tell the suburban kids from the city kids at shows, especially if it’s at a place like the phoenix, last nite was tv on the radio (a 30 dollar ticket!)(we had guest list, i would never pay that much)(i mention the 30 dollars cos what idiot would pay that much for a show and take their shoes off at it)(am i crazy? or is it not totally arrogant to cruise on a couch nodding off in your socks on anyone’s couch but your own?) anyway, these babies couch hogged the entire time with their shoes off like they just hit the bong and it’s totally fine to just you know, relax shoeless in a dirty bar. stop you are embarrassing my SOUL! basically everyone was high who went to this show, high and useless. what fun. oh and there was some guest list drama that i’m debating whether i should burn a bridge or not over by railing about it on my blog (everyone will know who i’m talking of regardless), and it’s with the SAME person i chose to not previously burn a bridge with, past incidences is what i’m saying, a notoriously despised person within the industry already, a total bulldog. anyway, coffee first, gossip second.
my comments are down, the internet is broken, there really is no point to being on a laptop right now if we can’t even talk about how great my hair looks or how funny i am, if you really want to share your opinions with me right now you can email me and i will put your words into this post and then we can get on with our lives. i’m uploading some vids on youtube right now and there are some pics from yesterday on my flickr i am too fat to put here. i guess i should shower, it’s been daaaaaays, i have to be on camera in two hours i almost forgot and tonite we are seeing oh what the hell a package is downstairs BRB.
you know when couples start to look like each other…
she had blood on her face from picking and scratching at it too much and her clothes were dirty, like normal people clothes but just all roughed up, anyway, i’m in line behind her (not looking too hot myself, greasy, big glasses covering up my face, just dashed out to get coffee and a tuna sandwich) and she looks me up and down and goes “Pfffft” at me as if she’s hot shit and i’m not, it was very chip on her shoulder of her, fucking annoying. so not to be outdone, i totally ignore her staring up into my face for about five seconds then i turn and give her the mean eyeball and go “pfffft” right back at her, but my Pffffft was way meaner. it was also an effort to refrain from adding shut up junky to my pffft. anyway, that’s the news for now.
hey who’s the square who showed up? you shoulda heard my rendition of roxanne, it blew the ceiling off.
dude behind me is way feeling it.
and here i am pregnant with an alcohol baby, singing roxanne and blasting the ceiling off, it’s hard to sing in a tight skirt, christie loves the sound of my voice.
we packed all our stuff to head to the island yesterday and were greeted by this, so we turned around with our cooler and blanket and bags stuffed with beach junk and went to philosopher’s walk instead, where matt met us with his buddy amy, and we got tanked. not a bad time. seriously going to the island on canada day was the dumbest move ever. i mean, if you enjoy being annoyed out of your skull then it is totally the thing for you. fil almost lost it once we got back to the subway (to waste more money) and this big lady was eating a hot dog on the escalator (with two canadian flags jammed in her big hair) taking UP the entire escalator so we couldn’t get past then we just shove our way through her and down just as the subway doors close, that was like, the. final. straw. then we sat in silence til the next train came. next year we will have our own speedboat to take us to the island or, NO ISLAND!
