i better get some friggin emails today.

I remember this kid in rockland, maine was very friggin’ impressed by a cd I had. It’s so icredibly remote in that place that compact discs are deemed luxury fancy items. Meh. Listnin’ to black eyed peas with esthero before black eyed peas went all gay and got that hussy to join em’. I dig those little shorty shorts she wears in that hey mama video, they’re red with strings and almost pass for gotchies – jumpin’ music, swift dj, smoke machines and laser rays, look out weekend cuz here I come because weekend’s the word, the word.

oh billy

it’s totally awesome when u show up at yer auntie’s 75th bday party in a hot hawaiian dress and get completely soused and spill wine and champagne everywhere and take retarded photos.

life is not an emergency.

i got new shoes and a dress and fishnets and the kylie minogue cd and more shirts and underwears.

today it is my birthday. i don’t care. ok i do i’m lying but i’m pretending not to care because i’m a nothing loser who does nothing good on her birthday that is ever cool ebough. ok i’m lying again but i don’t care. yesterday we tied one on and my cousin fell three times and once into this baseboard heater and also spilled a drink on this guy’s couch too. glorious.

i got a fancy new watch from my dad.

oh and everyone who was blocked before from leaving comments is now unblocked. this is yer second chance so don’t go all gay on me and piss me off.

me being a heffer. awwrite.

so me and kristi watched a whole infomercial because the tv was all the way on the other side of the room and neither of us wanted to get up and change the channel. it was for this heat wave oven thing that cooks basically everything that could be cooked in an oven. ingenious. the commentary between us went something like this:

raymi: that girl is such a whore when she eats the meat.

kristi: i know she’s all; “mmmmmmmmmmm.”

raymi: she is SO porno.

kristi: look at that. i’d eat that.

raymi: they keep playing this commercial over and over wtf!? and the payments keep changing, like before it was 5 easy payments of 33 dollars and now it’s 4?

kristi: yah i noticed that too.

raymi: good thing we didn’t call when it was 5 payments. shouldn’t it be the other way around, like, you should have called us before now it costs more suckers!

kristi: < laughter >

raymi: < laughter >

kristi: and that guy just said a word wrong.

raymi: and they need a new slogan, set it and walk away is just so gay. they’re like some cult or something, what’s with that chick saying, “i see the light.” everytime he sets the friggin’ timer? creepy.

etc etc

ok bye

i lost my smokes and lost my mind and i ran all over the house looking for them and stumbled into the grotesquely obese cats who just look at me like i am mental and im like just because your head is small and you have the body of a fucking cow doesn’t mean you have to rain on my parade, sister.