DON’T mess with the dad outfit!

how long has it been since you’ve heard someone drop the Fbook speech, oh, 3 seconds? not from these lips though. when someone else brings it up i whip out my signature liner it’s good for spying on who got fat, is still fat, the uglies, the stupids, the knocked-up ones, the bald jocks… that’s my only advice, i know, ONLY? that’s THE advice! THE doesn’t even cover it, it’s SAGE advice, it’s like that asian guy in karate kid teaching you how to balance on a garbage can JUST FUCKING BELIEVE!

anyway, it’s time to make an example of someone!

this someone fil was in a grade 2/3 split class with back in the olden days, she in grade three, he in grade two. lets not mince words here people, she’s busted, then and now, has kids, is lame, plain, ordinary, this guy (me) can tapdance fire around her.

anyway, i applaud facebook’s attempt at etiquette in the acknowledging single status, taken, married whatever, it links you directly to the person’s partner you are spying on as we all know. this lady however, ignores this, somehow (despite inviting us to a BBQ this past summer we did not attend no thanks, more fantasy BBQ what could have been to come) and flirts with fil, a dude, ten thousand leagues out of her sea.

she types like this LOL *GIGGLE* tee hee just between you and me *giggle* you grew up to be a HOTTIE..lol giggle.

I KNOW!

just between you and me?

oh i wish we went to that BBQ now.

how disgustingly embarrassing for a grown woman WITH kids who is also MARRIED typing to some guy she knew from babyland the words GIGGLE and trying to be all secretive about it. barf.

i bet if we went to that bbq it would be a bunch of old bitches telling me shitty stories from grade 3 that have no significance on the present whatsoever, hey great coleslaw lisa, ps. SHUT UP! i like when i get to meet tons of chicks from fil’s past who act all territorial over him, one in part because i am younger so right off the bat this busted troll has to exert dominance, yawn, and second, because there is a *history* there that i was not a part of. hey lady how’s about being nice to me and joining the present and MAYBE i won’t shit-talk you on my blog for the rest of eternity?

i do not care about reading time and rice crispies and you don’t either, you’re clutching at i don’t know what, but it’s pathetic, and this embarrassing scenario wouldn’t even be happening if it weren’t for facebook, this isn’t some long lost reunion of THANK GOD WE WERE SEPARATED FOREVER! it was only inevitable an internet platform would come to seed for fraidy cats like you.

which brings me to another point, loads of kids i grew up with, went to school with are all in my face with WHAT’S THIS RAYMI WHO IS RAYMI??? in this little snickery tone of voice like the internet just began last week and i ran out and made up a funny new identity for myself.

people who “knew” you in the past, find you in the future, and expect you to be the exact same person as in the past, and scoff at this present version of you.

raymi, FYI, is what i’ve been working at since highschool, while you were busy getting bald, pregnant, married, working telecommunications.

in summation, fil’s facebook lady friends, when/if we meet, do not be rude to me, do not be passive aggressive either, you knew fil for like 4 seconds in the 80’s BIG DEAL, did it ever occur to you WHY he’s with ME and not someone from your class?

OUT!

should i make this a facebook note? hahahah

big mouth did a post on MG.org about the pre-show meet-up, have a read.