me: i want to see shoulder cats
cats with shoulders

Emma: cats have shoulders
or are they elbows

me: no not ones that protrude
like an ape’s
google a picture of an ape on all fours then one of a cat

Emma: eurgh

me: then picture the cat with shoulders like an ape

Emma: ha

me: hilarity!

Emma: must breed new type of cat

me: YES

Emma: breed for shoulders
like they breed for flat faces
find the most shoulderly cats

me: just get one to do it with an ape

Emma: or just to normal cats
poor cat
or poor ape
which ones the girl?
cats have barbed penises

me: the cat would be destroyed

Emma: not if it was the guy

me: true!

Emma: it would fuck up the apes inside

me: but he couldnt get pregnant

Emma: and then slink away
oh
well maybe the ape could have the baby
ape-cat
those cats would be really mean, their big shoulders would help them cling on when they attack

me: i wish i knew someone who worked at a zoo i would give them a cat to sneak in

Emma: just take a cat to a zoo in your coat

++++

me: can u draw me a picture of what cats would look like if they had shoulders
SHOULDER CATS
fil doesnt get how hilarious it would be

Jamie: isn’t that a saturday morning cartoon?
shoulder, shoulder, shoulder cats!

me: u are thinking thunder cats?

Jamie: yes
ever see Omaha?

me: no

Jamie: here
there
here
she has shoulders, AND she has boobs

me: HAHAHHAA
im discussing breeding an ape with a cat with someone else right now
to get shoulders
fil does not like when i talk about shoulder cats

Jamie: are you obsessed with them?

me: i have mentioned them a few times

Jamie: do you talk about them all the time?

me: he gets pissed off
haha

Jamie: would they still walk on four legs?
i think he hates it because shoulders would make cats more person-like, and that would mean he was gay with El Cid the idea of spooning with Cid and his hairy, muscular shoulders is just too much for him to deal with

me: they would be on all fours
no he just doesnt find it funny at all

Phil: what are you doing
are you still going for a tan

Phil: ugh with the shoulder cats

Jamie: technically they already DO have shoulders, dont they? Granted, like old lady osteoporosis shoulders, but shoulders all the same
haha
ugh with the shoulder cats

me: yeah i just picture them walking like cavemen