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being me is weird

i shall rebut this moreso later, kinda gotta split. a few parts i take issue with but more or less, i’m fine with it. to say i have no real gift to speak of is a bit rich. i’m interesting, that’s a gift. it’s a talent, in fact. you’re not. so, respectfully, fuck you. writing about individuals who do rather than not, does not make you interesting. taking advantage of popular culture, is not interesting. nor is it a gift. everything is old news before you even hit publish. maintaining eyeballs for ten years IS a gift. going out everyday looking at the world and asking yourself how to make the mundane, endearing, you try it. and good luck too. put yourself in center focus while you’re at it and take lots of shit for every minor detail down to your eyebrows.

another thing, i do not find honesty to be distasteful. there is no back and fight war going on, there is simply here and there is there and over here i’m finally purging, as respectfully as i know how, presently. also, over there the “veiled references” had been going on long before this week. i’m giving bare bones information, i feel. minimal.

here’s a quote not used in the article:

I’m not part of blogging circles. I can only tell you that Raymi is deftly holding back the feeding frenzy while she sorts out her life. She just took a bold leap and removed her safety net, meanwhile people just want the dirt. There’s a huge opportunity here for her to exploit the relationship’s demise and get a lot of attention from it, but out of respect for the other person, she’s not doing that and I think that’s confusing her readers more than anything.

i also never complained about the suburbs. make fun of, sure. certainly. absolutely. i grew up in suburbia so i know it well, hate it well, but still love it. i’m fine with where i am right now in fact, britt asked me yesterday when the plan was to make my way back to the city and i said i’m actually considering going further away. i was done with the city before i even left it.

one thing typically left out when it comes to the matter of breakups is feelings. manners. respect. we didn’t part on awful terms so i’m not going to paint the internet scarlet with IT’S FUCKING OVER YEAAAAAAAAAH blog posts straight off the bat. i’m going to, bit by bit, emotionally make out of context vague references, as i always have.

and now if you’ll excuse me i have to go figure out another way to get attention.

ps. i dug on the coors light mention. you know, being interviewed on a good day is nerve-wracking. try it on a bad day, following a couple bad months. see what drink you go for.

Hey Raymi

I’ve followed you a lot over the last seven or eight years. All I wanted to say was that I hope you’re ok and that I’ll be thinking about you. Seems strange I can get bummed out over the break-up of two people I’ll never meet, but there you go.

You’re probably my favorite stranger.
James

39 thoughts on “being me is weird

  1. gawd, raymi

    I thoughmt you were pregnant. And then there were the sis-face-mance imbroglios.(admittedly, they were mostly of my own invention)

    But I don’t see any underwear.

    I rest my case.

    love,

    vi

  2. Actually I think the article was pretty spot on. I think living an empty life completely open to the “eyeballs” of those with even emptier lives is any real gift. And frankly? I’m one of those who’s occasionally remembered to check your site over the many years. But it’s only because you’re the modern equivalent of a freak show (among admittedly many on the internet). Your audience doesn’t come here because they love you (even those who say they do). They come because they want to see you at an even lower point than them and feel better about themselves.

    You may indeed have gifts. You seem decent enough at the core; you’re kind to your animals and seemingly to others in general. And you have a certain eye with photography/art and you can string a word or two together. But until you get off this sick self-destructive roller coaster (and for fuck’s sake eat a bit better…living your diet vicariously through your pictures is a real trip through nausea), you will never find them. Or yourself for that matter.

  3. i think you forgot a chunk of your tangent there. never find them? who? what the fuck am i looking for exactly? oh right, an enlightening comment for once.

    my life is not empty. i’m sure yours is the tits though!

  4. i actually don’t know you well, have come here from time to time over the last 2 years, but can’t say i’m up to date with much of your and (past) Phil’s lives…but i’ll say this: that was one of the most poorly-written articles i’ve ever read from a…”professional” outlet. that was either just awful “journalism” or shitty editing.

  5. Hah. You know you’re doing something right when you attract jealous rants.

    Also, loving you and wanting to see you self-destruct are not mutually exclusive. They’re often the same thing. Tabloids thrive on that crap.

  6. hey Raymi – when is TMZ going to follow you … your super famous now. you should be on Oprah
    or get a talk show

  7. Hey Raymi

    Well…look…you knew that the press will do what they want to do with a piece like this. I write quite frequently for my local newspapers and it’s taken me years to get my stuff less butchered by editors. That’s a risk you take.

    I’ve just read the first and last sentences, so far, plus the cut line, and clearly they have decided to make this about “the break up”. I was a little surprised, because I thought they might focus more strongly on your history and earned stature in the blogosphere. There is no question this will be good for “business”.

    Here is my 2 cents worth, Raymi (and I think I’ve become kind of an cyber uncle/fan of sorts…): think about getting a book deal or bearing down on your writing, fleshing out the prose. Anyone who observes you have no “gift” is just demonstrably wrong. You’re an artist. By definition, that’s a gift. All the best…

  8. I’ll be happy to do the rebuttal of Hal Who? for you…they always used to say it’s better not to write the letter to the editor yourself…let me know what you want me to say, other than that I’ve known you all your life, long enough to know how very gifted you are, and never heard of HIM before…hope you get lots more readers out of this, and the bitterpills can go and do something profane with themselves…because we know they won’t be getting any from anybody else. Have a great shoot today, can’t wait to see the pix…xxx

  9. I cant believe I’ve been reading you for four years. I know that there are many other readerss who, like me, stumbled in and got strangely addicted to the life of a stranger. Raymi, for someone who supposedly has “no gift”, you’re doing something right. And I don’t read this blog because my life is pathetic and your life makes me feel better about mine. That Globe and Mail writer didn’t insult only you, he insulted your loyal readers as well. What a dick he is.

  10. What Johnny Maudlin said. That piece is just….callous. Besides, I don’t perceive blogging as an attention seeking pursuit, I’m starting to think of it as a way of ”doubling” yourself when you’re alone. Similar to being an only child with a dictaphone, lets say.

  11. Wow, what a piece of crap. I think I created better writing assignments in grade 10. I guess the best way to look at this is that journalists will always screw you over if it means sensationalizing their piece/attracting a larger audience. It sucks that this happened to you, but I think frequent readers of your blog can smell this piece of shit a mile away.

  12. The press is trying to sell papers. They don’t get the story right very often and their job is not to make you look good. Most of the news media people are not the sharpest knives in the drawer either. That’s why the internet and a lot of blogs are putting the old news media out of business.

    The popularity of blogs like yours is because you are entertaining and truthful Raymi. You and the rest of the bloggers are fresh and interesting. There’s many great reasons we read your blog instead of the papers. You should be proud of what you are doing.

    capt obvs

  13. Fuck Hal Niedzviecki, seriously. That banana has made a career of cashing in on cultures he’s too boring to have ever been a part of in the first place.

  14. I’ve been holding back on commenting on your breakup because somehow I feel it’s inappropriate to say anything at all, as I really don’t know anything about your situation – so how could words of advice or philosophical perspectives or, even worse, oversharing about my own similar experience ending an engagement, come off as anything but presumptuous? How the hell do I know that what you’ve experienced is at all the same? So, I won’t. But I will say that I wish you well, and that the pieces you’ve been writing lately are so emotionally real they’re almost painful to read, definitely the best and most intriguing pieces of writing I’ve read by you.

    Oh, and the globe and mail is definitely no arbiter of who has talent or not. How ridiculous is it to interview someone they deem newsworthy and then, at the same time, diss them as having no “gift?” Isn’t the fact that they’ve deemed this story worthy of their paper kind of proof that something’s obviously working about what you do?

  15. haha i love that you posted that– you’re my favourite stranger too.
    raymi–i dig your blog for many reasons–the wit and charm of course. and we are about the same age and living in the same part of this great chill pad we call CANADA. (myself, a 24 yr old female from hamilton/saint catharines) I get real inspired by your take on the everyday (luv ur still-life photos most!)you make me realize that i’m not the only one out there trying to make sense of it all while trying to stay true to myself. i find alot of comfort in this. and that can come off as a bit selfish– so i want to say thank you thank you for this blog.

    p.s. the FRONT pagggee of the globe shouldve read RAYMI IS COOL BEANS but duhh everyone knows this. <3

  16. i am reading the article right now, and this line: “She’s very much the epitome of the committed, addicted blogger – no real gift to speak of, besides this intense need for attention. And she thrives on it.”

    MAKES ME WANT TO HUNT DOWN THE WRITER AND PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE.

    i do believe that you are a VERY talented writer, and you have more talent then almost all the bloggers i know. when i think of who’s who of the blog-o-sphere, in my mind it has ALWAYS been you, tony, matt g, dooce.

    i’m writing a letter to the editor.

  17. Haven’t checked in in a while and sad about the news, but it was obviously the right move considering how you felt.

    You are a beautiful and capture life in such a whimsical way that I can’t help but come back to your site time and time again.

    Thank you for being your genuine self and keeping your blog alive through all of these years.

  18. You create, you feel, you do it for all to see. You are giving and many ppl take advantage of it, grow to expect things from you. kudos for being so seemingly brave all of these years. for pulling through, being true. i wouldn’t know, but i imagine i would probably crumble under all of the heavy scrutiny and idiot comments. i have no choice but to admire your strength.
    i didn’t like the article much, it was weird.

  19. “Fuck Hal Niedzviecki, seriously. That banana has made a career of cashing in on cultures he’s too boring to have ever been a part of in the first place.”

    Hahahahahaha, YESSSS.

    Shulgan is a bit of a hack. He probably banged this article out in 20 minutes. That he chose Hal as his “expert” smacks of laziness.

    Sorry Raymi, I was hoping for something smarter. Globe fail.

  20. I didn’t like the article, it seemd like it talked down about you while trying to make it look like it was being cosy and nice… Maybe just my view… a few beer imbibed…

    On the bright side, it’s only the Globe and Mail, it’s not like it’s a real newspaper….
    Have a great life….

  21. Hi. My name is Lisa. I’ve been your blog stalker for a little over a year. I check in on you mostly every day. I don’t know how I found you but I stayed. At first it was because I liked to see what kind of whackadoo caftan you would be wearing out in public. But I now realize it’s because you are everything that I am afraid to be. I wish that i could really let people see the real me and I think that you do. Good, bad or bizarre. I love ya, man. I think what you do is brave. I say that any press is good press. Anyone that knows you (in the blog sense) gets it. Anyone that checks you out will get it. I feel like you are not “writing to us” but talking to us. Like when you are at the bar and have a few drinks: sometimes you are a fountain of truth(tequila)and sometimes you just talk shit (Jameson and Ginger Ale). What’s wrong with wanting attention?? EVERYBODY wants attention. Suck it up while you can get it. I know that it isn’t my business – but like that girl that sits next to me at work that I talk to all day.. I am friends with but not really – I was worried for you, Sad for you, Happy for you (why can’t it be a good thing? You are taking charge of your life. Fuck ya!). I think your silence about the matter was a bigger statement then a long comment and 20 pictures of you packing. Anyhow, keep it together sister and I LOVE LOVE LOVE the lighter hair. Makes your skin look great.

  22. allan, as always, much obliged.

    maudlin, i know lennon well, well, you know, would have liked to (will listen/view that youtube clip later). hero of my father’s, mine too. did you read the last days of lennon? you should.

  23. Awww honey I was just scanning your posts (haven’t been here in a long time) and I just NOW realized that you actually HAVE broken up and I know this is a run on sentence and I know I already said something similar in my last comment but I am thinking of you and I know it sucks and I wish nothing but the best for you. <3

  24. Oh my good GAWD there’s a Globe and Mail article????? I feel like I have landed on a new planet. I have been your internet follower/bud for YEARS and I get busy for a while and all hell breaks loose.

    Bitterpill can suck it.

    I will go read the article now, and judging by these comments it is less than positive, and the idiot who wrote the article doesn’t know shit because you Raymi are the blogger that eats all bloggers for breakfast.

    For fuck’s sake.

  25. ha. he quoted me in his reply. yep. i’m gonna jump on a plane, fly half way around the world to shit in a bag to set it on fire to stick on his doorstep. i might also visit toronto island (cuz eddie vedder told me to).

    actually i guess i could outsource the shitting…

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