She, walking like a killer

how do you follow a post like that? uh normalcy normalcy! bah.

for the billionth time, weed helps.

canned wine.

felt completely mentally exhausted yesterday, put through the ringer. lamest statement ever, second half of that last sentence. cliché pile. lets invite the entire town to the trainwreck.

and so halloween evening i was treated to a taste of class, burlington style. on our way to bar 2 this car of four attempted to drag race us at some lights, cool. minors, assumed, why else would you be riding around halloween nite in a car if you were old enough to get into a bar? you wouldn’t be is the case, you’d be partying. anyway, as we were going on ahead to park safely making passage for the other car to speed away one (putrid looking angry nerd) guy in the back screamed at dave NICE WIG YOU FUCKING LOSER. dave thinks he said faggot. i heard loser. no matter, crazy rage shakes took hold and i said can we do something about this right fucking now!? so we peeled out of the parking lot in pursuit for awhile but they were gone. SO so mad. who does that? that guy deserves a curb-stomping and i’m certain if he lips off strangers on the regular, someday he shall be gifted by one. it was the way he said it, the look on his face, so certain, so disgusting. ugh. plus acne and bad hair, and he wasn’t riding shotgun so we know the pecking order of his social circle. desperation is not a hot look.

act two. in bar, meet some pals, there’s a back private party going on we get in on, realise we’re pretty plastered but oh my fuck they do it differently here. everyone is wrecked, i’m kinda diggin’ on it but also a little taken aback. ps. my nickname is toronto by the by haha. we go to the pool table near the back just to, do something? we get to playing, then it’s my go (stripes) and there’s a table tucked in the corner with some surly folk haulin’ drinks. one thing here is people are ready to throw down at the drop of a hat, are actually looking to do so. this ain’t your hipster pretend you don’t see one another scene which you don’t realise you’re fond of (though while immersed in it, hugely HUGELY annoying) until you hit “downtown” burlington. this scene’s number one priority is YES i saw you and i saw that you saw that i saw you, now what the fuck do you want to do about it? everyone in costume adds an extra element of bizarro. ps. for the record i LOVE that “i know that you know that i know…” saying. typing it is very rewarding. you feel like you invented comedy.

anyway, my shot is up and it’s one of those have to shove the pool cue way out in to someone’s personal space shots. this girl, or shrek as i might say, (not dressed as, just unfortunately shaped as such) in a terrible platinum blond bob wig is sitting on a high chair seat watching my uncomfortable situation. there’s also an empty seat right beside her but she’s choosing purposely to stay put, jack and coke in-hand, exactly in my way. i give this scenario two second’s worth of patience then i purposely flub the shot, put cue down on the table and commence knocking all the balls into their pockets by hand. shrek blechs out at me AW SOMEONE GOT UPSET. i ignore, continue over to my pint and other table casually, gingerly, librarianly. shrek says YOU COULD HAVE JUST ASKED ME TO MOVE. i make my way around the pool table to get the rest of the balls in, put my arms in the air and say I THOUGHT IT WAS PRETTY OBVIOUS (in my most effective you are so beneath me tone of voice, it’s a pretty good one ask my brother or anyone who knows me) in normal people maturity manners land, it is. you just move and carry on with your own shit. not here. then some other unintelligible shit was uttered in my direction, the air got a little tense. i was still pissed about the piece of shit from the car prior to this wonderful scene plus way too blasted to deal so we chugged then split once the proper amount of standing there making everyone as uncomfortable as possible time was allocated.

if you choose the table by the pool table intended for pool sharks, you are not allowed to be annoyed if someone playing pool gets in your way a little. that’s kind of the fucking rule and you are no exception, aside from being exceptionally white trash. why does crazy follow me, do i bring it on myself? am i deluded? i used to defend myself in saying it’s cos you live in a city and go out a lot, the probability of more and more shitty scenarios is higher and likelier but now i’m beginning to wonder. i never initiate aggression with others is what i’m saying. is it my vibe, my look? what the hell.

oh and on my way in one genius girl says to me ARE YOU A NERD!? (librarian glasses) i was just like where am i what the fuck, how do you react to all of this? this change. everything. i told her um, yes? she was dressed as amy winehouse and holy moly what a mouth, what an incredibly loud belligerent wailing mouthpiece on’er. i kind of admired her.

maybe a little anti-climactic but i’m sure it’s only a little while til the next class-act reveals themselves.

in other news, the local mediterranean establishment continues to offer up the most colourful and amusing of drunk people watching spots whence hangover dining.

also don’t forget tonight to nominate my blog for the 2009 weblog awards if you want to help motivate me to continue on the coarse of steering this shit show ship. i took it last year for best diarrheaist. i feel like the last year i did a pretty good run of things, yeah? pretty on par and consistent. also hello, how could you say no to this little elf?

that’s what greasy write-off day hair looks like. this picture is so fucking stupid i am making it my new blogger profile picture. i might even put it up there where the welcoming i am a pretty girl with an internet website sidebar photo is supposed to be. WELCOME MUCH. i title this image the weed grinch: comes over, gets high, eats all your candy, talks mad shit, makes you laugh so hard you die then steals all your dvds.

(ps. needing a volunteer makeup artist to paint this mug saturday for a video shoot. come be a part of something spectacular)

here are the categories you can nominate my blog in.