matthew good’s book arrived yesterday and so did jamie’s. i like how matthew good writes because it’s all the crap i think about except a bit different and he had it all put together and published oh and he talks about having a sequel to water world which is brilliant because i loved water world despite it flunking at the box office. i dunno why everyone shit talks that movie. i thought it was amazing and i would probably buy it one day if i remembered to and/or wasn’t busy buying other stuff that i don’t need and beer.

yesterday i got a new scarf from the bartender because i am special and it was annoying him and it is the material of a sofa and someone spent too much money on it because it is ugly and they gave it to their husband and he forgot it on purpose at the bar and so i am going to wear it like crazy and hopefully have a confrontation with a rich lady with bad taste and say here is your damn ugly scarf biotch in front of all of her friends and she will march over to the bar and confront the drunk man husband who is part of the football pool and he will say I NEVER LOVED YOU ANYWAY and everyone will be excited.

noel gave me cool pins that he made with his button-maker.

i gave most of them away already and took credit for making them right in front of him and he was amused by that because we are all about LYING FOR THE SAKE OF ENTERTAINMENT.

some are of different pictures of michael jackson and say 1000% innocent.

the others are of the tampax insertion directions that are cartoonish and fil is going to wear one tonite because finally a button exists that is ironic and seedy enough and the opposite of gay.

julka’s sister was mean to this guy who tried to talk to me outside because he was lonely and i mentioned the suburban town i currently habit and said the ultra-cool nickname for it and he was like wow i think you’ve started a trend and she cut him off and said bla bla i hate that suburban town and GUYS WITH ACNE and the dood was all hurt and slunked-off from us and i said wow that was cold.

he did have a lot of bad acne and he was kinda repulsive-looking and what not but STILL you don’t make cheap jabs like that.

she drank a whole bottle of scotch before coming out and tried to walk out with her pint of beer and the bouncers were like woah woah what the fuck? and she goes wait huh what about the patio? and we look around and there is clearly no patio there because there is snow and it’s winter. it was all very hilarious.

her and julka are russian jews and so i asked what they did to celebrate the 60 year ann. of the concentration camp thing and julka said huh what? we got drunk or something, it was the anniversary of, what? what happened?

anyway.

i thought of a fictional story plot finally that i am going to hammer out that does not involve drinking at a bar and it won’t be called “the bar journal” because that is too depressing right now.

i’ll write that in the summer when i am less retarded and have my shit together hopefully.