Hi Christmas bros! Now, before fake-apologizing for my absence lets just get to it kay? Above is my tree. There is something satisfying about picking out a live tree, buying lights for it. Dressing it. Zzzzz. Blah blah, I made that shit son!

I love this scarf. Mostly in part because I selected it myself and have already mentally envisioned said self wearing it in various states of hanging out/working. Pumped.

Went for a Christmas walk today. I turned it kinda into aerobics, here I am side stepping – jumping rather. IIIIINTENSE. I also ran too. We ate early because sister had to work so my stuff was all said and done before you guys even woke up.

Watch out. Be careful. Thank you for your visit. Except w/o grammar.

Typical Dutch home, usually on a lot of land. Farms. Stereotypical awesomeness.

Look at the no snow. Also, it’s very mild. We had a crazy windstorm a couple days in a row and yesterday it rained uber gloomily yet you had spirit aboutcha from the xmas eve vibe. We had a fun day. Saw a movie with sis and her friend AND they sell beer there AND you get a pee break “pause” mid-flick, but mostly it’s for smokers which is also awesome. It makes movie night more social, less boring. Plus the movie concessions are bizarro world selections and you can get funnel cake-like deep-fried balls called: oliebol, half the posters are in Dutch. I mean all of them. But the movies are the same as back home. But with Dutch subtitles at the bottom. Everything is basically a trip. It’s all the same but different and you are constantly wondering if everyone is lookin at you because you look different or is it because you look the same but awesome?? Head buster.

Pauze is like break assumedly. I understand 15% of what people are saying and zone out the rest so it’s a massive mental holiday too for real. Starting to accrue funny verbal interactions with strangers moments as well note to self. Some assume I am American and yes, I do get attitude.

I got spoiled.

Scarf heaven. I look tired. We stay up late watching telly. We haven’t seen each other in 2 months, about. Plus it’s holidays why the fuh am I going to bed early for?

At his parent’s place. The girls were out smoking when we drove up they were dressed all nice it was a cute moment. I then connected to how mild it was here than in Canada as I saw them out on this balmy bench – they removed the plants to sit. I wouldn’t have thought of that.

The days are shorter because The Netherlands are more north. Less daylight and so daylight, is valued.

At sister’s last night before the movie, her and mom said I’m thinner. I’ve gained a kilo+ (3-5lbs?) since being here omg there is just so much to enjoy. YOLO.

Bike material for daaaaaaaaaaaays. All the pics will be slightly better too, this camera is ballin’ I almost forgot.

Then there are the food differences and just blowing tons of money at the supermarket, cheese is amazing, so is chocolate. Meat. Snacks. I am going to miss the light OJ, the getting booze from within the supermarket, these stick chips. SIGH.

Fashion is hot too. I will definitely be treating myself to some of that before I leave and I finally have the time to just do it period. I will also be most definitely paying extra for luggage weight on the way back. Early January are the sales too. I think that one’s pretty international though.

EYEROLL.

Oh here’s why people were staring, I looked like Peter Pan: Christmas Jiminiy Cricket edition. I was close to getting a pair of boots but patience was at an all time low. Ankle boots are in, I wanted a low heel pair but they had to be the best pair of the 200 or so varieties AND at best value (deep inner-seeded cheapstake syndrome) but bf left store and I was like “this shopping is about US!” Bahahahah. Then I started crying and we were like ok F-T, shopping is officially over. I know I’ll go get them once they’re all on super sale in January. I was angry because he made me suffer ADD-HELL boredom while he looked for a coat and fair is fair, you have to help me pick out boots and make this chore easier. You’d think shopping would be enjoyable. Nope!

Seeing everyone on these, and bikes, is really inspirational. Kids, young girls with long hair in braids just like tooling around it’s another life. You can ride town to town on the bike paths along the roadway, or all the way to Amsterdam and not have to be anxious about highway bullshit.

Bike dramas everywhere. Hey man he fell. The wind knocked over tons of bikes. The forest today had a lot of fallen over trees. We are storm junkies.

You’re welcome!

The difference is there’s relish in it. I relish the thought. I heard they were going to discontinue making relish because nobody likes it. Where did I hear that? Lol either way.

Haha aw. Our necklace is talking.

I got this half. I suppressed screaming out something like I’VE ALWAYS WANTED A SISTER. Like, the forever side could be anything she could just lie like she doesn’t mean it (haha hyper-insecurity sets in).

Why are you wearing red though? Red is my thing. Red is the jam on my bread. (it’s okay I am just joking we can share). It’s funny though we always show up kind of matching. #getoutofmyhead.

German steakhouse time. All of these have been backward by the way. I’ll turn the rest around now so the meal portion of the post makes sense.

Wearing my new Ralph Lauren sweater for the first time. I had a red one similar to it, maybe it was Tommy? Either way, I tend to have a red sweater at all times if I can manage it. Wow, this drivel is tops eh, are you on auto-pilot right now? hello tap tap.

Upon trying to decide where to go, bf was like a-ha I know the place! The staff dress up in tradish German Oktoberfest gear and break out into dance flash mobs to, you guessed it: traditional German tunes a la European vacation beer garden scene.

We have one of these in the back garden here. I love that sh–. (Bilbo’s home from the shire is at the movie theatre too, perfect).

So much chemistry. Stop. I can’t deal.

This was above our heads. I was like, does he know how ridiculously risky it is to bring me to a place like this? To Santa’s %^$%# village? And I got to watch a staff party comprised of dudes all drinking and talking in their funny talk and some with Legola’s length ponytail hair, does he want me to die right [expletive] now? I ate a Steak in Santa’s cafeteria basically and it was awesome.

And I ate Rudolph while I was at it! Just kidding!! That has nothing to do with reindeer, but we don’t know. German is even more impossible for me to comprehend.

We didn’t even finish these. Amateurs. Wasn’t in a beer mood. We ordered a lot of food which influenced that likely.

Wooden menus. No stone unturned. Commitment.

This was our first time dining out since I arrived. We had a nice homecoming love-in whatever. When you finally leave nest your pupils are all dilated in a mysterious where am I? sense, and it’s dark already of course. I didn’t see daylight for awhile when I arrived. Then I was stuffing my face in Christmas Town like WTF is going on O_O?? heheh.

What do they do when it’s not Christmas? This stuff should just stay up forever.

No matter where you go, there is always carpaccio. That not only rhymes but should be the country’s subline. #freeadvice #justsaying. #copywriter

Mushrooms and ribs. Bf hasn’t really been out eating either so we’re a food club again and have to go on a lot more walks now otherwise it’ll be the salad club #boring.

This guy beats the steaks we ordered last night. I’ll get to that later, the service was not good. We were cool as cucumbers though but then every gaff made the dining snob etiquette beast from within arise more and more. A staff party was going on in the other side of the hotel. The thing is, every place you go to here is ornately and exquisitely Christmasly decked out which makes you think they really care about you. Well, they don’t. Then your anger just builds from there. I said you’re supposed to leave a restaurant feeling satisfied and happy, not angrier. BF laughed. I notice all the service fuck ups long before him, then I stop mentioning them privately to him then he starts to notice too because they just keep happening, then the second server takes over because the first one can’t deal. Which is a hand-off classic in the industry. Lets start with menus, can we have those? We didn’t ask for 15 minutes. The girl was just clued-out. Moving on.

Sides. French fries country. MMM.

Garlic sauce and butter country likewise. Kiss your diet goodbye bro.

My doggy bags, Ribs and potatoes. I will probably need to get my cholesterol checked when I get home. Ha.

What time is it?? Anyway this is over for today. Glad to be back, I missed blogging my heart out. Merry Christmas to you and yours and have a wonderful New Year (if you have time). Thanks for being great internet friends and all that. Bye, RLW.