Ain’t nothin’ but a Yay Cray

I don’t know how successful a blobber I shall be today, there are stars floating in my vision and it looks like I have 20 fingers speeding typing this crap to you right now. I am on the mend from my weird flu one part party one part, flu? But only in that it’s maybe mid-way point but I am still deep in the throes of it. Oh boohoo what else is new whining on a blog everyday what is the diff between that and not being sick? Hmm, well cold medicine for a start. I guess I eat a little less, and I couldn’t sit up at all yesterday. This is what’s in store for you if you catch the raymi 31 ways to die virus. I think I need to re-word that one because it might make the viewer think that I am turning 31. Which according to How I met your Mother is a disgusting age to be. But 28 is alright. OMFG it’s my last month of being a 28 year old and a week has been wasted trying to act like an 18 year old so there must be a lesson in here somewhere people. J/k like I give a care about anything ever party on wayne.

I like how Rebecca has to tell a story about every thing she pulls out to show us like how I do too but this was funny because she said AND I GO OUT SHOPPING WITH THIS like hello is there some other purpose for, this? And the second funny thing about it is she thinks she should get a medal for it too I threw myself on the bed laughing and no one knew why I was laughing which of course made me erupt in to more giggles for it. That is probably when the atom was split and the sickness started its thing.

It’s just desserts that the next coming day’s posts will all feature how I did this to myself. Colleague asked if I got a flu shot and I don’t believe in that hocus pocus baloney, I believe that people SHOULD get sick because it makes them stronger, maybe not an 80 year old lady but you know a my age type person should still be able to get battered from a bad bug for a week and fight it out, it’s good for the soul searching even though in the beginning stages I was quite petrified I had meningitis (I am an alarmist through and through) and was going to die, I had horrible migraines all over my body and it felt like all of my organs shut off, pain everywhere like my own Trainspotting moment. I haven’t drank in days too I’m quite proud to say considering I treat all life’s ailments like a polish grandma’s and pour some vodka on it. Keeding just keeding. Tak tak tak. Lol. See I told you I am squirly so I can say anything I want today.

Chi Chi No No is the name of that cat making contact to her people via this photo. Yes actual name. Cat people are cray don’t forget. Make sure you see Puss n Boots, so many cat jokes and cute cats and it’s very clever. We watched it Sunday over Booger King as I began my caterpillar in to death sick town butterfly transformation on the couch. Dad you will like that movie.

I am brushing my hair with the cat brush, well pretend, I think my salon would flip bananas if that was for real and say hello to sergio who was a yay cray with us too he only innocently dropped in to something I forget and then was hypnotized by the almighty yay cray powers of our prowess and stuck around to bear witness to some seyances aka drinking potato vodka and dancing in shadows.

Look it’s my tupperware it never made it home and see by tupperware it’s actually a delivery container. I can make a to-scale pyramid out of my collection one of these days jajaja.

It’s weird how my head is shrinking right? Normally when girls get skinnier their head is a big bobblehead like Lindsay Lohan’s during her opening on SNL but not mine stay tuned!

Did you skin snakes with that?

I need a tan now. It’s ridinkulous.

That’s called dancing! I think?

Jules enjoys shakin’ her boot-ay it’s fun dancing with you kid.

It’s funny watching dude pervs in the room staring googly eyes at Jules and sorry for cock blocking you, it’s her choice too. As we left the party I was like now Jules, you can go back there and have any guy you want, is that what you want? We have a yay cray party huddle and continue off home, leaving 3 guys running after our cab. One girl at the party was like why is everyone horny? Ha I can’t wait to blog that we got a lot of great fun photos. I never go to parties, I miss a lot of events, and seeing as I make making a coffee an event can you imagine what cray of an event-event I can make? And by my own steed too, social relevancy is not my problem it is yours.

Directing these yay crays to stand in the light was impossible.

Nay cray I say.

Rebecca is just in her own world. What would we name this place?

Ok dinklings let a pro show you how it’s done. Sometimes I get a really nice photo of Rebecca only after telling her to just take my direction (she is stubborn) and then I have to talk in caps lock NOW %$#^$% LISTEN TO ME I WAS ONE OF THE FIRST GODDAMN PEOPLE TO USE ONE OF THESE FRIGGING CAMERAS STOP NOT LISTENING TO ME. Then she listens.

Oh right we are going to figure out the lighting in Yay Cray Palisades because you have to keep the kitchen light on which is too bright, you need better mood lighting. People afflicted with my special sensitivities are in fact allergic to bad lighting. Fact.

Okay okay lets Yay Cray it out and all is well again.

Jules bewbies make me want to puke so jealous.

Someone said I can get a doctor note basically claiming to be sad for being flat and get implants. Hmmm.

JAjajaja.

Oh but of course who do you think was taking all the other YC pics. Serge might let us tie him to a tree and throw painless objects at him for a YC ceremony.

Even though it is bad luck to have a man around for YC club like having women on board a pirate ship, or any ship? Which was just a lie to go off without women you jerks but yeah we let Serge in once he agreed to take our pictures.

Bech said she had tacos yesterday. Grr. Not that I had any appetite yesterday or today for that matter but everything made me jealous yesterday, good thing I stayed off the internet. I watched Anderson Cooper give away a bunch of stuff on tv and I was jealous of everyone in the audience who all looked healthy and vital and their lives were together and they were going places even though they were sitting in a tv studio audience like morons with nothing better to do and the show was all about the internet and viral youtube channel people, and a girl in the audience just started her own youtube (cool story get lost!) and they gave her $1k for new “equipment” (WTFFF) and lessons (?) plus youtube trade secrets (I am sure!) at youtube camp (making that up) basically with a crash course on how to do it right. Canada is holding me back I thought lying down 180 degrees on the couch as a sickness statue.

While Serge and I were discussing a-holes, these guys were re-inventing the jean short.

Well, at least my eye makeup looks good.

I look like I am in a cottage. That’s my MO/how I live my life anyway, like it’s a cottage and always drinkin’ on tha porch time.

Just because we like to dance doesn’t mean we always get it right and at the same time.

Phewf, saved by this gem.

What’s that move called again?

Girls see how intricate I am at all times? SEE!

And this is a dance representing degrading whomever is dancing nearest to you it’s hip hop’s version of capulet vs montague thumb biting or whatever they did.

The Yay Cray Beam passes through the center of our pentagram I can’t wait to watch this in movie form.

See her scar? Once in awhile we get to hear I SHOULD BE DEAD proclamations. Chilling. I won’t know what she’s talking about and will apply it to no no you’re just having a bad week lol then clue in oh right, that, yes totally but you’re not yay cray power was watching over you.

By the power of yay cray it was not your time to go to kokomo yet so that means you probably have to “make something of your life” boring worthwhile stuff like that see I told you there was a lesson somewhere in all of this.

It’s nice to have a yay cray in your life, more people should embrace their quirks, dedicate blogs to them, start your own thing and forget about memes because we get it already.

Uhoh sexy pants time def time to go home ps serge’s eyeballs the YC worked on him.

It would be funny to share the funny reaction Serge had to bech’s sweater when she showed it to him but I can’t, sorry!

But I will do this little dance for you to apologize instead.

Brad Pitt has ruined these hats for everyone.

This is what you have to look forward to btw!