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punk bunny

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5120702188/

my friend was a little nervous when i said i was dressed like a holly madison grease puck bunny. hey guy my outfit was better than yours. i almost dressed the part a little too well.

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went to the real sports bar beforehand. dig that place. good thing it was REAL. really stupidly named. i have another crowd pic where every single man is staring at me, it’s too blurry though. sometimes i am so not used to attention.

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I LOVE HOCKEY I SWEAR. i even wore a bra. that shirt is pretty see-thru. it’s my 80’s swingers fondue party turtleneck. don’t hate.

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hangover beer was delicious.

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voodoo shrimp and green curry chicken. decent. quite.

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shittish tickets. meh. walked down to better ones later on. posing as a self entitled twat pays off.

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i wish there was better wine selection.

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she looks familiar.

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ahhh.

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like it better with pinhole. more old school.

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blind greek (not actually blind but a typo i sent to steph in email meant to be blond so now obviously his nickname is blind greek) spilled his beer all over the guy in front of us right after i was making fun of a guy wearing flip flops (at a hockey arena!) we were surrounded in enemy territory after that. his buddy wasn’t able to pull through and scout out better seats for us so we did it on our own. steph was all oh fuuuuun going to a game but i don’t know how fun for a blind guy hahaha.

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hockey pictures are boring.

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ex hockey player, used to play with “these guys” whoever they are.

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idiotstick behind me is actually saying FACEBOOOOOOK i turned around and gave him the cuntiest look ever. moron there is more to the internet than facebook and ps. that shit is old son, welcome to two years ago.

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we won, 3-1. got in a little spat with a sens fan on behalf of my sens-hating (despising) buddy. now that i have finally seen ottawa as an adult all the hater comments coming out of there make way more sense to me. ottawa is boringtown and it can’t get over it. i saw the entire scene in like two hours, one nite. i said to this girl behind me posing as a toronto fan (she said she lost a bet, same thing flip flops detroit fan said as he was wearing a toronto jersey) that it must burn her up inside that ottawa has lost to toronto so many times and she goes yeah well there’s always the future. you’re welcome osler.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5120115289/in/photostream/

discoball.

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binoculars is the guy blindo spilled beer all over. he, did not like it.

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i don’t know any of the player’s names anymore. think haven’t been to a game in at least two years. i learned that phaneuf guy’s name, but only because he’s boning elisha cuthbert, or she’s ploughing the other one now? anyway one of them got suspended cos he said the other guy is into his sloppy seconds. love it.

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down in front, hairdo.

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on to white wine now.

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hahaha.

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more please.

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see how i’m pointing? i point when incredulous shit happens like an oblivious guy about to walk through my shot. seriously do your eyes not work? the majority of these white collared idiots are keeping our economy afloat meanwhile they don’t know how to walk around arenas through crowds. unbelievable. i master that shit you better keep on my heels cos i am navigating through the herd like i’m on meth. gone.

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seat change.

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ice problems. maybe if you didn’t crank the heat in there so much?

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ASSAULT ON NORMAL PEOPLE’S SENSES GIVE ME YOUR COTTON CANDY IT’S IMPORTANT. girl with white arm sleeve is the sens fan i ripped on. i said she was a good sport multiple times then i’d rip her some more. i really do not give a care about hockey beef/rivalries, i just like to get people fired up for my own amusement sometimes.

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it all started when she cheered when florida scored. once the booing died down (from leafs fans) i turn around (perfect comedic timing of course as i am a comedian and master of delivery) and say YOU HAVE REVEALED YOURSELF. then she says she’s a sens fan etc and so forth i am already bored of this.

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i didn’t even get baked for any of this. my eyes were very squinty i knew i’d burn out hard if i did and then i might fall down some stairs cos my numbness affliction is back in action again.

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i got a billion pictures of my feet.

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hockey players are really young eh? i say to greek, not like the old school 40 year old players like wendell clark, does he still play? (i knew he doesn’t i was just pretending to be really stupid hahaha) does hulk hogan play too, how’s his season so far? greek’s head almost exploded.

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i promise i will not bore you girls with this ever again. maybe if they let me sit on the ice next time. i should be paid to go to games as many people i know watched it just cos i said i was going to try and spot my stupid pink shirt.

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if i got on the jumbotron i’d do the fake beej motion.

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this photo blows.

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nothing like a stretch suv limo ride.

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or more eating. at jack astor’s.

STARVING!!!!!

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saw your website

Hello. I just want to say that I love how slutty you are. And I mean that in the best way possible. You seem like a person who does exactly what she wants and doesn’t care what others think. That’s great. I bet you fuck amazingly, too.

im pretty sure my dad will be extremely proud of this email.

I don’t know about your dad, but if I were your boyfriend or husband, I’d say three cheers to that e-mail (and yeah, I’d be proud). A gorgeous, intelligent, funny slut with a great sense of style? What’s not to be proud of?

I am not a fucking slut

Are you sure?

I wasn’t trying to insult you.

definite intentional insult you fucking asshole

That’s really amusing that I called you gorgeous, intelligent, and funny, yet your subscribing to the narrow view of what a “slut” is, seems to cause you such distress.

the issue is you are declaring for me that i am a slut
there’s slutty
then there is slut
who the fuck are you to me anyway, or to say?

rude.

the end.

29 thoughts on “punk bunny

  1. your hockey post(s) dont bore me :D

    sean avery was the guy who quipped about sloppy seconds

    some of the hockey gossip stories i’ve heard are almost too good to be true haha and by good i mean baaaaaaad

    the oilers have a few rookies this year, one being Taylor Hall..apparently a girl from Edmonton claimed on FB that Hall was “her greatest accomplishment” hahahaha

  2. Dude, if Facebook is two years ago, what’s the equivalent these days? Twitter? Blogs have made a comeback?

    PS – Keep pushing the envelope with your outfits. Styyyyylinnn.

  3. facebook gives me gas. I actually HAVE Holly Madison tube socks, they look like normal tube socks but the inside says “Holly Madison”. A couple of years ago I spent an odd month being totally addicted to that damn show–I’m ashamed about that, certainly, but the socks are still cute. :) p.s., I love you.

  4. 1) You do look like Holly Madison a little in that top.

    2) Sens fans are terrible people, and their stadium is halfway to Kingston. Fuck them. Ray Emery was the only cool thing about that team.

    3) Slut is a loaded word, dude. You know you’re trying to get a rise out of her with that shit. Don’t lie like you’re not.

  5. Canadian hockey mascots are terrible.

    Leafs have an Ativan-soaked polar bear.
    Canucks have a bearded whale.
    Flames have a humping hound dog.
    Montreal has a space alien stolen from baseball.
    Ottawa has Stephen Harper.
    Edmonton has… nothing.

    It’s Edmonton.

  6. dear internet troll guy thing, what is it like to live like a big pussy? to be born a pussy and then, to die one?

    thanks for the loyal readership.

    much love, your pal raymi.

    ps. i would put you in the hospital if you had the nards to say that to my face but, you don’t so have fun in the shadow of fear. double ps. don’t wrongly assume that you hurt me at all in any way shape or form. you are nothing to me i just feel feisty normally you get thrown in the trash where you belong. xo

  7. emilio, facebook yell outs when people are taking photos in public of ordinary stuff to document like oh, a leaf game or a birthday celebration = two years old. not funny. i would laugh if they said oh are you going to pump the grey scale and tumbl that ish in a slideshow? then my face would get frozed and i’d go why yes, what a GREAT idea, thank you!

  8. “Are you sure?”

    That is awesome. I’m sure you gave it some serious consideration upon that question.

  9. sorry honey, but you aren’t what one would call a “classy lady”. If you post pics everyday of you topless, your ass (which is getting getting bigger by the minute) and all other suggestive poses, than a random blog reader would have EVERY REASON to believe you’re a skank.

    A spade’s a spade, doll.

  10. “STD FREE SINCE 1983″ hehe

    I love your writing, pure Gonzo! Purists will crucify me for saying that, but it is. Your internal dialogues & occassional diatribes are brilliant. I love the 10 year old artictles your probably now ashamed of; Dating a Drug Dealer, Queefs & How to be a small town slut are hilarious.

    For the record, it’s your writing I come here for. It’s your photo’s that make my visits compulsive. I perhaps still don’t truely appreciate all the photo’s and don’t necessarily believe what your doing is ‘right’ so to speak, but hell your doing it and no one ever called me Gonzo – so good on you.

    Greetings from Wales, UK.

  11. I confess. I am the idiot troll. It’s a low road. I am entering troll rehab for six weeks. You now have 4,999 readers daily. Finally: I think your restaurant review thing is very solid…

  12. I’m curious how many emails from asshats you receive vs the ones from people who really enjoy reading your blog. I also applaud you for ‘outting’ them and their lame-o emails.

  13. I hate when people try and insult your intelligence by wrapping up a couple of compliments in with the true nature of the email which was to call you a slut and then pretend they did nothing intentional.

    losers do this.

  14. Nice shots by the way, good camera

    you didn’t bring your Leaf Jersey but made up for it with the hockey socks.
    Would you like me to buy you Maple leaf socks for Xmas?

  15. my ass is actually getting more fit by the second, sorry but it will always be a great one, great genes. all my fat goes to my love handles and arms which takes a week to tone. http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1241/5120396129_6ae342cf49.jpg

    as for being a lady or a whore, whatever girl, which one of us is laughing all the way to the bank? modesty gets you nowhere in life. be a renegade and focus on your own shit if haters come your way, which you have mine, that says more about you than it does me. i did something that incensed you so much you had to fucking let me know it. i am still winning. ten years strong, getting stronger and better. we all age, we all get uglier fatter, get thin again, fat again.

    you sound so oppressed and narrow minded i feel bad for you.

  16. thank you shan. gonzo was my second favourite muppet. animal first. and then fozzy.

    i am ashamed of nothing that i’ve written in the past, why would i be? i’m proud of those articles.

  17. dude us girls like seeing you @ the hockey game. i enjoy it more than dinner night after night. in the end its your writing & photos that keep us coming back regardless of what you write about. but please don’t censor stuff like hockey out of your blog cuz you think we don’t want to read about it!

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