sexism: RAMPANT in farting
it’s true. i even took down some notes last nite just to expose this disgusting horrendous affront to my fellow bitches on the ole blog today. i know, it’s because i care. you don’t have to thank me all at once.
anyway, fil ripped one and i felt it big time from the other side of the couch and i was like wow that was mega extreme and he goes well it’s supposed to be cos i’m a man. oh really now? so are my farts supposed to be whimsical little music notes cos i’m a chick? who decided men are supposed to blast roofs off and women aren’t? how long have we been suppressing our solid ass explosions for (YEARS) because we aren’t supposed to do that and because we are “ladies” holy stupid taboo. we have the same parts (save for genitals) yet biologically, apparently ours don’t work like yours (dudes) do?
enough already, i’m sick of this same old tired charade, pretending to be all demure and polite because that’s how nana does it. for a woman to even conceive of farting it’s just “not allowed.” here’s another thing fil said, “i feel like i’m hanging out with a gross boy” after i let one fly ok fine yeah fil isn’t a sexist pig but i get where he’s coming from, it’s ingrained in all of us to see it this way. i dunno why but it’s just extra disgusting when a woman farts. like a clown crying. one extreme to another etcetera.
my mother kept hers to herself throughout my parents’ entire marriage together no wonder she was so fucking wound up (she let them go in front of me though and once in awhile accidentally in front of my brother then denied it like crazy) and whatever OOOH NO DON’T EVEN WRITE ABOUT ME FARTING get over it. mom guy, you fart. unless there is something physically wrong with you, you DON’T. so stop pretending this is breakfast at tiffany’s i totally just heard you blast a hole through the wall when you were folding laundry there nice try.
i am also sick of farting in front of friends and them having the nerve to act like i didn’t just eek one out (ps mine don’t smell they’re just wicked loud like, shockingly) HELLO yes that earth shattering deep baritone eruption was me don’t all of a sudden get busy with that napkin in your hands i KNOW you heard that. this is especially annoying with new friends too. everyone’s pretending to have manners. BORING.
when fil and i started dating i was the first one to fart (massively) which set the tone (haha GET IT!) opening the fart floodgates but before that he endured a fartless 7 year relationship can you believe it? not possible. i think i tried that with my first boyfriend, attempting to silence huge rippers that take like ten minutes (longest minutes of your life) to get out, so uncomfortable on multiple levels. dude KNOWS you’re farting, you’re not invisible, the expression on your face shows it all, your one word responses all of a sudden, yeah, so farting. you end up torturing that person with your inability to just let it out freely you fucking control nazi way to go.
ok i’m done i just wanted to point out that sexism is STILL and likely always will be hugely present in terms of women farting, it’s super annoying (especially when some fat disgusting slob opens his mouth about it) and i wish would just go away.
it just pisses me off listening to my brother and dad cut them like crazy then it’s my turn and they are like straight up EW about it. you guys are grossing me out over here and have the audacity to be offended by my one little addition to the party. total hypocrites.
also i will lose my mind if i don’t crap today.
oh and check out the banner i made for alicia! ms paint SKILLS!
I 100% agree with you. I find it hillarious when girls fart and then look so embarassed that they did it. I’m like will it make you feel better if I fart too?
farting can really make your day
Farts are whatever! when people burp and you can smell what they had for lunch, now that’s disgusting.
especially sausage burps
sick
i occaisionally fart at the dinner table (only around people i am comfortable with, not my boss or anything) and i usually find it amusing. (mostly when people get disgusted) my sister in law ignores my farts i guess cuz she’s a proper lady. at least acklowledge the clapper that just bounced off the wooden chair for pete’s sake. you know it sounded funny!!!
i’m with you raymi.
i think it’s the company you keep, because chick farts are no big deal in our house … both my husband and brothers applaud any good gas, not just of the male variety.
it is only completely appropriate that ali made it in that post somewhere.
very true she is fart city
that’s bullshit. women don’t fart.
bahahahaha i’ve been silencing farts my whole life. yes, wound up.
ha ha dont worry it’s not feminist like how we talked about to think that biological ordinariness is somehow beyond sexism you dont sound uppity it’s not some SIGH and a shrug and a finger waggle and post-modern nightmare.
i dont think ive ever heard any annoying academic feminist fart in my years in school so far. still waiting.
here’s something to think about and i think its related to farting it’s the same biological self-denial shit. (HAHAHA)
bathrooms. right?
like it’s super strange that its more NORMAL to act like you are sitting on a toilet NOT crapping just wiggling around hanging out on a bathroom toilet like whats up with that?
i myself have been guilty of trying to act like ho hum yep im not waiting to take a dump im just hanging on the toilet it’s a good spot to just hang, real wonderful place.
or the geniuses who actually comment on your shit-in-process who walk in all WTF is that smell
like how did you not notice that you just walked into a place where people piss and take shits, this isn’t some lounge it has these seats where people do their thing that we all have to do.
i dont take shits in your living room so quit bringing your living room standards to the goddam bathroom hahaha
i dunno, too far?
women are neurotic self-deniers who pretend that the only thing that comes out of our assholes are butterflies and perfume god forbid our bodies work.
i know this awesome chick who has a few concurrent disabilities and so for her she doesn’t really have the option not to take a dump in a public place, she just has to go whenever it’s happening no holding it and she’s just had to get used to it and the commentary and womens attitudes, it’s hilarious. so some people dont have the luxury of even pretending they are not human. there we go lesson learned.
Every time I fart I laugh out loud. Really loud. My brother and Chad think its so gross and that makes it funnier to me.
my favourite part: “i dunno why but it’s just extra disgusting when a woman farts. like a clown crying.”
it’s the fart barrier. like i know i really feel comfortable with someone when i can can cross that line and not feel weird.
Like you, I started the farting in our relationship. He can tell the difference between regular and period farts. He’s more open about it than I am, but mine ARE just naturally quieter than his. I don’t hide them, unless we’re in public.
Also, your lake pictures inspired me to rent a cabin at the lake resort of my childhood, we’re leaving on Friday. Thanks!
Ahhh Raymi, you make me laugh, dude. I needed some giggles (and loud farts) after my hellish day, so thank you.
I do burp really loudly, which yeah, is just gross, but whatever.
Something apparently going on at the Gladstone:
http://tinyurl.com/nhex6v
cute story – my parents met at a boarding house in north london, uk and while my mom and a friend were hanging out, they had a farting contest in her room…my dad walks by – pokes his head and asks what they’re doing – to which they reply “having a fartin’ contest”. shocked and dismayed, my dad says “i didn’t know girls did that”…and my mom responds, “what? you think we blow it out our ears?”
they’ve been married since 1979.
Good Gawd
Doomed left a message on my private blog that you had made a “nice post” about me….
So I rushed over to read it and its about farting…..Just great
“women are neurotic self-deniers who pretend that the only thing that comes out of our assholes are butterflies and perfume god forbid our bodies work”…
Well this is me, mine are like roses
Very true
I didn’t fart in front of your dad or brother….
I’ve since heard that if you don’t fart in front of your partner
then it wasn’t mean’t to be
You know what though, I still say, when in doubt
its always best to be a lady
having said that
your brother was indeed perplexed
that you would enter the room, beautiful straight blond hair
lovely figure,great posture
and you would look at us and just “let one rip”
not just an ordinary one
but and earth shattering Trucker/Footballer fart
then you would smile and walk away
Your brother thought just to look at you, that it wasn’t in you
but he may also have been let down that he could preform a few ” fem farts”….. little pffff’s
Here’s an interesting link. Don’t watch it if farts gross you out. I think it’s kind of funny…but then I am a stinky little farter!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZW1ZqlVF18Q
i once had a boyfriend who said he doesn’t want to know that girls poop. i was like wtf where do you think the food i eat goes?! men are weird.
Dude, this is off topic. This Japanese guy has 8000+ subscribers. Content very similar iffin you consider fishing and shop till you drop potpourri:
http://www.youtube.com/user/jetdaisuke
One of the best parts about being single is being able to wake up and just rip as many huge farts as I want without having to worry about offending anyone — Although from time to time I worry about my landlords hearing. Sad but true!
ryan literally praises me when i fart in front of him. “way to go honey”
victor that jetdaisuke guy rules!
hayles that is such a cute story.
tristan i’m pumped for you!
steph i don’t think i have ever heard you rip one.
hilarious. and true. i hold mine in all day in front of people then apparently fart in my sleep, and get made fun of by my boyfriend for it. lame.
Not as bad could anything be, as the South Park queefing episode. Nuff said
i am the president of fart city.
i love this post so much. i think farting is a riot and i can out fart my boyfriend any day of the week, and i’m very proud.
oh and one time my friend was upstairs in her house and was sitting on the floor and let one rip and i heard it through the floor when i was downstairs in the kitchen. amazing.