yesterday’s late lunch sashimi for the infinity’th time

can someone tell me what that tongue-looking fish is? i use to be all about it but it’s too chewy and the more time i spend chewing, the more thinking i do, and then i start to think about what the mystery fish might be and looks like as it is being gutted, so i start gagging. anyway.

we ate in the window seat at sushi on bloor, don’t put people in the window unless you are getting them their order fast who cares how many annex trolls are waiting for take-out with babies wrapped in blankets clutched to their stomaches like pocahontas, when people walking by the window see the cunty impatient look on my face it is all over for business. also don’t forget to bring our salads either. if the entire population of the annex spread their business out to the other fifty japanese restaurants dealing would be a lot more simple. what’s the deal with sushi on bloor, why there? did margaret atwood mention it in a fucking interview once?

see, someone agrees with me.

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someone has a crush on raymi!

george ogled my face up close and said HEY YOU ARE REALLY CUTE.

i’m going against my how not to have a shitty blog code of ethics so i’ll stop there anyway he took off before i could pester him about being on the hour.

as obvs. we wore the flight suits out, wearing them when you are pmsland is alright in respect to the i want to be dumpy BUT they are also belly-enhancers.

i am so over drinking nxne go away!

that fell out of a girl’s hoodie pocket and bounced a bunch of times but the girl didn’t notice and we were feeling like a-holes so we didn’t tell her instead watched as everyone stepped on it and kicked it around unbeknownst to the girl, her eyes even sweeped it a few times but didn’t put it together. i said to fil i bet she’ll finally notice it and be like hey i got that cd from a different bar it’s in my pocket uh NO it’s not. i also enjoyed the fold wrinkles cos it looks like she had been carrying it awhile. earlier that day a lady’s shirt fell off her purse and she didn’t notice so i ran across the street to tell her, my nice window closed shortly thereafter. oh i also dont give out the i cares to oversized hoodie-wearers, not even at the cottage.

that might even be her leg in the second picture. we kept watching her sit there looking at it and not realizing it was hers. oh and before you explode on me for being a bitch it was mostly fil’s idea. i was already pissed off from him smashing my beer to the ground cos a friend of a friend of MY friend noticed him and he turned around and stood up for some stupid reason and his flight suit knocked it over. who stands up?

dear cid:

yes, we got the you are crazy memo. thanks.

people ask me all the time hey raymi what kind of hair dryer do you use because your hair is really long and pretty. well it’s funny cos NO ONE asked me that ever. anyway here you go, some hard-hitting news way more important than paris hilton’s mental collapse.

this baby is so fucking old it is a wonder the thing still works and doesn’t shoot flames out the back. it used to be my grandmother’s.

you can see make-up smears on the cord, decent. it’s funny that at some point a hundred years ago this was likely the height of technology. life brand no less.

what a fucking beauty she is the turbo 1600. what does 1600 mean? 1600 miles per hour? 1600 times i can turn it on until it sets on fire and explodes in my hand? it is actually one of my retarded phobias, death/mutilation/electrification by hair dryer.

peep those features.

while i’m at it there is my magical styling implement how interesting. so small and practical. i think i tiefed it from my mom.

don’t be jealous.

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this still totally kills me.

this guy REALLY liked fil. he is in a vampire band. i’m trying hard to not write a hahahahahahahahhahahahahha under this one.

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me: fart

Jason: agreed

me: i know

Jason: i saw you guys at the drake last night but, i was only there for about 20 minutes. melissa had an amazing show again, did you see anybody exciting yesterday?

me: what did u do when u left
drake poured me the biggest whiskeys for some reason

Jason: somebody musta known you or something. everything i get at the drake is watered down. i had to go to “harlem” to shoot some freestyle hip hop dude from halifax. the people who i have the pass through are doing a story on him. his name sucks: ghettosocks.

me: hahah
where is harlem
and ghettosocks sound familiar

Jason: on richmond, just east of church, last night ghettosocks actually had a song called “paris hilton is going to jail” kinda funny. then one guy made me give him a word to include in the rap and i was a little drunk and caught off guard because i was shooting and i said street. then he spent the whole rap mocking me for coming up with such an “unexpected word” haha. i’m a hip hop loser.

me: you are such a fucking loser wow
HAHAHAHHA
i can picture it now
were you humiliated
oh fuck
street
thats like the chicken of rap words

Jason: haha.
i am not a rap guy.

me: rap guy!
hahahahahahhaha
it’s rapper!

Jason: i wasn’t even trying to come up with a rap sounding word

me: well you did

Jason: i did

me: you should have said something that doesnt rhyme with anything or said fuck you aristotle think of your own word

Jason: well, if i could think of anything i would have
that’s the whole point

me: what is, that you are a disgrace to the white race?

Jason: i would only be a disgrace if i was trying to be all hiphop WITH those guys and wearing jerseys and sunglasses, and i came up with “street” and thought it was cool

me: well it’s pretty funny i would have said garbagemouth or refrigeratorhead

Jason: in retrospect, i should have asked you to come along. lots of opportunities for photos and mocking “fuck you aristototle. think of your own word.”

me: then i would get jumped for my camera, phone, hat, boots, wallet

Jason: the crowd was mostly white and asian kids. the only black people worked at the bar.

me: were there lots of posers
ya

Jason: almost all, i’d say

me: im putting this on my blog

Jason: ah fuck

me: what
it’s gold

Jason: me being a loser

me: well maybe you will learn a lesson from this

Jason: perhaps.
or it’s quite possible i’ll always have material for you

me: well if you look at it like you said it in mocking of them

Jason: if i tell the story again, i will

me: when the guy was rap dissing you were the white kids going OH SNAP

Jason: but not around you because you will bust me
they weren’t reacting at all
and i was back shooting.

me: oh you just described one of my dreams i live for busting people, you’re all talking then i screw my face up all witchy and say THATS NOT HOW IT WENT

Jason: haha.
i am aware of that.
it’s a lot safer to just let you talk.

me: i say embarrassing shit all the time

Jason: you know how to “take charge” of a coversation

me: yeah but then i blow it cos in my head im like hey i have the floor then i basically say the word nigger

samir looks like jimmy kimmel here.

this chick thought she hired me for this is london cos of the hat yes that was me.

melissa, luke, paul brennen – passenger 24

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me: did you see my short shorts
andthe fucking war it started
http://raymitheminx.blogspot.com/2007/06/yes-or-no-yes-no.html
check the comments

merkley???: wow

me: do you like them?

merkley???: sure
i’m not as much for off the self fashion as some

me: off the shelf?
those things are old and not meant to be so high

merkley???: ha

me: when i was skinnier they fit on my hips

merkley???: really?

me: i just pulled them way up yeah
and cos of my love handles they look like high waisters

merkley???: i like vintage more due to its scarcity

me: theyre not
so burn on everyone
they use to be my moms
theyre like 4 years old
not vintage
not meant to be

merkley???: anyway, cant sardly go wrong with short shorts
and the fact they were your mom’s boosts them a lot

me: yeah its that or dumpy potato art school dresses
i bet she wants them back now

merkley???: man i hate your comments section almost as bad as i hate mine
no — more
me: ha

nxne at the drake, peter elkas and melissa mcclelland/luke doucet, dear alcohol LEAVE ME ALONE!

sorry, craziest dog ever.

he rules cos all the drake dinks waiting in line got barked and jumped at.

ahh!

go to mcfly2015.com and sign the petition for nike to manufacture those shoes.

valency sent us flight suits, i think they’re the new hangover house outfits. we’ll wear ‘em out i’m sure too. thanks valency!

STRAWBERRY BLOND – ron sexsmith video, nxne.

if you see the teaser ads for next week’s cntm episode you can see me and fil! i am again wearing the green/black striped sweater and my high tan boots, and fil is to my right, your left. it’s playing every 4 seconds on city pulse.

i bought new pants at h&m today and i am 2 sizes smaller! i grabbed what i normally try on which usually fit but look fucked up, too much material in the vag inner-thigh area and dumpy on the side thigh basically, everything legs excessive material. all of my weight goes to my love handles so i am a pear. i gave up trying on pants at h&m for 1.5 years cos it makes me depression spiral city, today i thought i would give it a go and i grabbed a biggie pair and it was a tent, so i went out and picked two more pairs in smaller sizes, tentatively thinking oh i’m defs gonna be the next size down only. wrong.

h&m’s sizes are smaller and meant to make you feel like a hippo i guess. anyway i’m slated right now so i dunno be prepped to read a ton of pants poetry.

oh lisa, i saw the dress you described and i REALLY wanted it. i haven’t seen anyone wearing it. no matter, i always heed thee blog advice. so no chevron stripe for me. i mean

hello crazy ontario weather today! we went to the burbs for some biz to take care of and fuck, trees down all over, where is helen hunt when you need her?

speaking of poetry, more poetry slams war graffiti. if you have been following, this all began when i scribbled POETRY SLAMS = SINGLE FOREVS. on the wall of an annex bathroom that hosts spoken word, poetry slams, music geek instrument blowjob nights i dunno, and so, people took the bait, finally, with some goading. my side is winning, of course. i can tell by the script that i am arguing mostly with the same person.

this is the script that keeps popping up.

also this one, they like to say GET A JOB as their argument. funny.

oh, but of course your mom’s new age “wacky” friend myrtle chimes in. i was going to X it out and write GO HOME but i think i’ll save the vegan war for a different stall.

good one, ugly.

i said that. first cuss word in the whole thing i fear it will all be wiped off.

i said that too. just in case the nerds forget that they are the problem not the solution.

oh fuck, get ready.

i gave fil the last quarter of my chicken burger with GOUDA and he crammed it in his mouth so fast i couldn’t get a photo of his porno-elated face. also he had just eaten one of his own.

i didn’t want to be too full so i shoved these guys into the ketchup/chutney mix to dissuade myself, and it worked.

not for fil, though.

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watch next week’s episode of canada’s next top model, you will see me and fil, i am wearing a green and black striped sweater and probably look fat and making busted faces. i can’t tell you anything else. don’t tell me about this week’s show we have to catch the repeat. oh and if some nerd knows how to record it (next week’s show) and wants to put it online, by all means do it. maybe just the part with me in it.

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I don’t know how you deal with this abuse from a bunch of petty shitheads who sit around all day waiting for your every move that they will then attempt to copy and call their own.

“Hi, I don’t care, thanks”…that says it all.
Monstergirl

i said a dumb thing to ron sexsmith i said his friend wasn’t important when i wanted my picture taken with him and ron said actually he is and then i got flack for it all nite long til i talked to the guy and turns out he is all yeah he barely knows me, basically saving face for the guy, ron was, so burn on everyone for not getting it.

i told him strawberry blond was one of my favourite songs and he said oh should we play that one? YES. he did. then afterward he said thanks for mentioning it cos they never know what songs to do.

i made a video of it too.

i ran into some old school friends who were there for blue rodeo, who didn’t go on til 3am, we left halfway thru melissa and luke’s set. oh man my liver.

the shorts were a hit, this awesome chick from scotland called me a doll, everyone else asked if i was wearing a skirt, my shirt kinda covered everything so it looked like i was wearing i dunno, a tiny skirt? then once shorts were revealed everyone was really impressed by my balls. and jealous.

ran into an ex-friend’s friend who recognized me from my blog and we shit-talked the mutual friend who OWES US MONEY and half of toronto!

that’s the nxne mascot some little old lady made them all by hand, only 77 were made and i got one cos i am probably the only retard who will make the effort to take pictures of it everywhere.

fil got plenty of sweet shots, as usual.

FIL SAID I AM NOT ALLOWED TO WEAR THESE SHORTS OUTDOORS!

i’m not going to listen anyway.