irish you a happy st. patrick’s day

last nite dad came into town to watch the leafs lose. i wore my new birthday jersey they’s all got me (mrs. pitt, pitt, fil, chad) it says RAYMI on the back and 83 (birth year). so now i am a full-blown hockey nerd. i didn’t wash my hair yesterday either so i had some wicked greasy hockey hair and i am able to finally tuck my bangs behind my ears for the full mullet effect. i also wore my dad winter boots.

so we went to the pourhouse and went to the back to watch the game on the shitty screen we find a modest table with two seats around it and ask this couple who are old and making out if we can use one of their chairs and they purposely ignore me for ten seconds so i am standing there making the WHAT THE FUCK face at them and fil says excuse me are all these chairs being used and the fucking woman in her horny cougar bitch dreamy daze just slowly WHIMSICALLY even nods her head yes as in yes they are being used no apologies whatsoever and her nod was so subtle i asked her again SO ARE THEY ALL BEING USED? and she gives that phony bitch nod again and the guy she is with total prisoner of her cuntness asks meekly oh we can give them one right? and by now it is like a competition she has realised she is a cunt and does not need three extra chairs but still says they are being used so as i turn around to sit i exclaim WOW WHAT A BITCH to fil. big mistake lady our table is right beside yours and you’re in the drunk section.

after about ten minutes of trying to make her as uncomfortable as possible we moved to the front of the pub to watch the game on a better tv. fil forgot to go back to their table when we left to see if all the chairs were being used. before we left someone else came up to them and started dragging a chair away and me fil pitt eyed that bitch like hawks and she pretentiously waved her arm at the dude saying that chair is hers.

fuck i LIVE for those moments.

-george costanza