LOOK IT’S MY MEAT WEDDING CAKE!
Monthly Archives: August 2006
look how fucking earnest i look. (insert whisper british accent) NO SIR I DON’T KNOW WHO ATE THE LAST PUDDING I SWEAR.
anyway the next time the super’s wife is vacuuming in the hall and my studies are disturbed i will go open the door, step aside, nod like i don’t speak english and swoop my arm and direct her into the room to continue vacuuming our apartment like it is not at all out of the ordinary i am losing my marbles.
i know it’s for spammers but i like it when certain people leave that comment code encryption shit in their blogger comments like 1. they are going to get ten million junk comments because the entire advertising universe reads their blog and AHA FINALLY A WAY TO PEDDLE OVER THE COUNTER KNOCK-OFF TYLENOL! and 2. i feel like i am a spy and i cracked the magical code to send my super important message when really it is like four letters of the alphabet kind of lopsided and really close-together OOOH HARD and the super important comment i leave is something along the lines of “ahaha GAY FOR REAL!!”
yeah that’s right indiana jones and tom hanks you can just FUCK OFF and MOVE OVER cos TTyyr Qqqq3%%& = I AM A CODE BREAKER TOO
i am going to cut a dress into a shirt that everyone who reads my blog except lise and fil says is unflattering so now i have a new shirt SCORE. also you can now email me at raymi@stalkraymi.com
UPDATE
i am growing my bangs out and they are growing in fact RIGHT NOW.
this is what happens when i promise to wake up when fil does cos that’s the only way i can get him to stay out later with me, and then i have to write on my blog a hundred times.
anyway this is what i plan to look like this fall, allow me to reveal:
AUTUMN RAYMI 2006
breathtakingly innovative, i know. and yes i am going back to black and not wearing pants. so if you see anyone walking around looking like that this fall you know where they got the idea from. there’s a possibility i am going to let my uni-brow grow in.
i dunno about you but i for one am SHOCKED! the secret is finally out.
you know i could have written this breaking newsbyte a hundred years ago.
JUST SAYING.
and now finally, evidence of how awesome i get whenst intoxicated…
holy grossosaurus rex
poor cid, i’m still awesome.
fil’s nipples + aerosmith + three hundred bottles of wine later. oh my god i can’t watch this without my hands over my eyes and ears and mouth and a bag over my head. too much.
apparently i turn into a valley girl.
oh yeah i dreamt i was pregnant and the doctor was advising me that i should abort it or try for a miscarriage but the only way to miscarry was to put a cherry bomb in my twat and sit in the front seat of fil’s car and drive it into a lake with the windows down so all the water could flood in and then boom, abortion. in my dream this all made perfect sense. the doctor was asian so like obviously he knew what he was talking about. i was very much dreading this feat so i was trying to just make myself bleed and i kept looking in my underwear for blood and i saw some but it wasn’t period blood according to my childhood friend who was playing with horse figurines, i was just bleeding internally and it was coming out of my vagina so now i have TWO things to worry about. GO DREAM!
GO CANADA!!!!
