last nite i smashed what is most likely a family-heirloom hurricane lantern, just the glass part though and spilled red wine every fucking place i stood/sat and all over the boat and today four separate people commented on my drinking ok fine i GET IT. yes there’s nothing sexy about being a drunken fat pig but when the guys do it it’s ok but when me and my big mouth do it everyone wants an intervention fuck off.
i am sick as a dog and my arms fucking kill from tubing, i cannot lift my arms to put a stupid gay hair elastic in my bird’s nest hair and i have a massive mosquito bite on the bridge of my nose what looks like a volcano about to erupt, i have wicked funny gossip to share but i can’t say it cos too many people read my blog, too bad, i can’t even mask it oh well, maybe i should make a turn for the better and not talk shit about people anymore, i know, booooring.
fil wanted to mention on his blog how hilarious he found an advertisement to be about toronto’s new trash megabins but the ad was on the side of the regular trash bins, ya fil hahahahahalarious also he got me a vodka tonic from the bar at the horseshoe and me being drinklor was all I CAN’T TASTE THE BOOZE YOU GAVE ME TONIC BLEEEEARGH! and he’s all NO NONONO IT’S VODKA WITH TONIC AND GIN! both vodka AND gin?! so nice!
then me and kane spent a solid five minutes praising the simplicity of mustard and ketchup on a hotdog versus ten hundred condiments, it was a very passionate discussion i will tell you that.
ps toronto teens i wrote a song called STOP STABBING EACH OTHER! it’s gonna be a big hit.
what else can i tell you?
uh.
i have this wicked clip of a drunken guy who ruled at edgefest who had the best moustache and hockey jersey and wal-mart runners and he was drunk swaying by himself, his hair was pretty good too it was like hey fubar, FUCK YOU I’M THE REAL DEAL!
mad props to joel for being the opposite of homo and getting us passes and letting me feel up raine and then smoking everyone’s pot and then not stop talking i don’t know what?