we had this cat, moacha, a hundred years ago who was siamese and the sketchiest cat u ever saw and she was beautiful and a total snob and then there was sheeba who was also siamese who use to smell moacha’s ass and one xmas we couldnt have a big tree just a tiny one on top of the television set kuz sheeba woulda threw herself into it (much like my brother’s white trash cats do. they like sleep in the fucking tree and watch you when you watch tv and pretend like they are not there but you know they are) and when we got back from ottawa sheeba was sitting on the tv and the little tree we had was smashed to the floor all messed up.

sheeba could do huge jumps and flips and twist her body so retardedly and when she ate grass she vomitted all the time like immediately. hello that made you vomit 2 minutes ago, remember? stop chewing more stupid. she escaped all the time to watch tv thru our neighbor’s window on their back step and when we found her she would look at us like what the fuck idiot i am just watching entertainment tonight, relax.

moacha was a stray and fucked from the start. that’s how you know what your cat’s temperament will be. like oh this one grew up in a dumpster and got rained on all the time and that cat came from a crazy breeder or whatever. now we have rocky and rocky is the shiznizzle. he’s a bit of a lesbian but that’s fine. he smells my vagina fingers and licks them clean. meh. right now he’s in skitchen kuz he took off again in the backyard so he is sitting on the bed looking at me like i am suppose to touch him.

i want another siamese cat. find me one please. thanks.

lets go to the movies! ok!