we’re the ones who paid for the bombs we built the planes that they’re on

my first

and second favorite audblog posts

im banned in saudi arabia and i now have a 17 yr old scam artist rich kid with 35k$ usd car making a porno site with my pics on it and he keeps asking me do you have the thong pics every ten minutes and i make 45 per cent off him everytime and it’s just ratty old pics you’ve seen already. ooh illegal!

i only write when im stoned my career as a blogpusher is over already i wish i had a roach somewhere i was thinking but man i DO have a roach somewhere. wooh.

grape koolaid with moskovskaya but no cigarettes are to be found.

i called shawn to bring some over but he is at the refinery so he’s gonna come over with his seriously drunkard boss and hang later at like 3 im like no come earlier i need them NOW.

to dress like i have aids or not is the question. hmm.

me and my buddy rocky aka winkles sprinkles fuckface meow meow stupid etc and i can’t help lookin’ like an elf.

this is alex. hi alex. he is my friend what lives in zurich and is the reason i bought my own fagboard. he has a gf of four years and works in some skateboard shop or something. i’ll link it eventually. yay alex.

send me this size small and i’ll give u a postcard or a few personalized photographs.

this too please.

meow meow.

holy shmoly

I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in

And stops my mind from wandering

Where will it go

I’m filling the cracks that ran through the door

And kept my mind from wandering

Where will it go

And it really doesn’t matter if I’m wrong

I’m right

Where I belong I’m right

Where I belong.

See the people standing there who disagree and never win

And wonder why they don’t get in my door.

I’m painting my room in the colourful way

And when my mind is wandering

There I will go.

And it really doesn’t matter if

I’m wrong I’m right

Where I belong I’m right

Where I belong.

Silly people run around they worry me

And never ask me why they don’t get past my door.

I’m taking the time for a number of things

That weren’t important yesterday

And I still go.

I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in

And stops my mind from wandering

Where it will go.

Just Plug Me In Just Like I Was Eddie Harris You’re Eating Crazy

Cheese Like You’d Think I’m From Paris You Know I Get Fly You

Think I Get High You Know That I’m Gone And I’m A Tell You All Why

So Tell Me Who Are You Dissing Maybe I’m Missing The Reason That

You’re Smiling or Wilding So Listen In My Head I Just Want To

Take ‘em Down Imagination Set Loose And I’m Gonna Shake ‘em

Down Let It Flow Like A Mud Slide When I Get On I Like To Ride And

Glide I’ve Got Depth Of Perception In My Text Y’all I Get Props At My

Mention ‘Cause I Vex Y’All So What’cha Want You’re So Funny With

The Money That You Flaunt Where’d You Get Your Information From

You Think That You Can Front When Revelation Comes

You Can’t Front On That

Well They Call Me Mike D The Ever Loving Man I’m Like Spoonie Gee

I’m The Metropolitician You Scream And You Holler About My

Chevy Impala But The Sweat Is Getting Wet Around The Ring Around

Your Collar But Like A Dream I’m Flowing Without No Stopping

Sweeter Than A Cherry Pie With Ready Whip Topping Goin’ From

Mic To Mic Kickin’ It Wall To Wall Well I’ll Be Calling Out You People

Like A Casting Call It’s Wack When You’re Jacked In The Back Of A

Ride With Your Know With Your Flow When You’re Out Getting By

Believe Me What You See Is What You Get And You See Me Coming Off

As You Can Bet I Think I’m Losing My Mind This Time

This Time I’m Losing My Mind thats right said i think im losin my mind this time this time im losin my mind

You Can’t Front On That

But Little Do You Know About Something That I Talk About I’m Tired

Of Driving It’s Due Time That I Walk About But In The Meantime, I’m

Wise To The Demise I’ve Got Eyes In The Back Of My Head So I Realize

Well I’m Dr. Spock I’m Here To Rock Y’All I Want You Off The Wall

If You’re Playing The Wall So What’cha Want Y’All Suckers Write Me

Checks And Then They Bounce So I Reach In My Pocket For The

Fresh Amount See I’m The Long Leaner Victor The Cleaner

I’m The Illest Motherf**ker From Here To Gardena I’m As Cool As A

Cucumber In A Bowl Of Hot Sauce You’ve Got The Rhyme And Reason

But No Cause So If You’re Hot To Trot You Think You’re Slicker

Than Grease I’ve Got News For You Crews

You’ll Be Sucking Like A Leach

You Can’t Front On That

So What’cha Want

And it goes a little something like this…

Unemployment at a record high,

People coming, people going, people born to die.

Don’t ask me, because I don’t know why,

But it’s like that and that’s the way it is.

People in the world tryin make ends meet,

You try to ride car, train, bus or feet.

I said you got to work hard, you want to compete,

It’s like that and that’s the way it is.

Money is the key to end all your woes,

Your ups, your downs, your highs and your lows.

Won’t you tell me the last time that love bought your clothes?

It’s like that, and that’s the way it is.

Bills rise higher, every day, we recieve much lower pay,

I’d rather stay young, go out and play,

It’s like that, and that’s the way it is.

Wars going on across the seas, street soldiers killing the elderly,

Whatever happened to unity? It’s like that, and that’s the way it is.

Disillusion is the word that’s used by me when I’m not heard,

I just go through life with my glasses blurred.

It’s like that, and that’s the way it is.

You can see a lot in this life-span,

Like a bum eating out of a garbage can.

You noticed one thing, he was your man,

It’s like that, what, and that’s the way it is.

You should’ve gone to school, you could’ve learned a trade,

But you laid in the beds where the bums have laid.

Now all the time you are crying that you’re underpaid,

It’s like that, and that’s the way it is.

You know it’s like that, and that’s the way it is because…

Check this out

One thing I know is that life is short,

So listen up, homeboy, give this a thought.

The next time someone’s teaching, why don’t you get taught?

It’s like that, what, and that’s the way it is.

If you really think about it, times aren’t that bad,

The one that flexes with successes will make you glad.

Stop playing, start praying, you won’t be sad,

It’s like that, what, and that’s the way it is.

Check this out.

You know it’s like that and that’s the way it is, because…

i said balmy today. a word, admit it, you don;t hear very often. it felt balmy out, it was dope. like robodopeness.