Dear Douglas Coupland

Sorry i haven’t written you in awhile. i’ve been a bit busy. i haven’t been replying to emails or updating my blog. it lends (can i use the word “lends”?) me great anxiety to not do these things. i don’t want people to not come back here if i don’t update regularly. i’ve been getting myself into a nice little ball of debt. i want a credit card so i can get paypal and then sell things to people. like my journals or my shoes and stuffed animals. i like to share. you keep things in your life for a short while and then you let them go. nothing in this world is permanent. except maybe for styrofoam.

i spoke with many nice people last nite at the underwear modelling gig. it was hip hop nite and we confused the regulars. i wore nipple pasties and a thong and dirty sneakers. we video-taped it too.

i want a new job or another job or to never work again. i just want to go out and stay in a lot and have money and have money and have money. i think i am bipolar or manic depressive or whatever the hell it is something that’s wrong with me. i can barely work, you know. it’s hard. my work hours are very minimal but still, i am there and after a couple hours i have to leave. and then i go somewhere and spend money.

well anyway, i have to think about what i want to do today.

take care.

love raymi.