i do not like wal-mart anymore.

we went there tonite to go to the mcdonald’s because finding neverland was sold out so we had to eat garbage to get over our sadness.

anyway, the female’s restroom totally depressed me. there was piss on every toilet seat. a lot of fucking piss. and some blood even. and there wasn’t any toilet paper either.

all the mcdonald’s employess were total loafters with their cellfones in their hands like annoying 16 year olds talking about marijuana and all these dumb street fights that never happened and they fucked up our order and my double cheeseburger was made all wrong.

i don’t like feeling like i am the prettiest girl on the planet when i go places and i usually end up feeling that way when i go to wal-mart and fuck you for being shocked by reading this because you feel the exact same way at wal-mart too so shut up.

oh and if you say i don’t go to wal-mart because you are a millionaire or whatever you are a lying piece of shit or you are paris hilton or trying to be.

wal-mart during the day is at least tolerable.

at nite it’s this whole other gross vibe feeling happening and all the cashiers make you feel like you are dealing with homeless people, you know what i mean? like you feel sorry for them because the atmosphere is draaaab and none of them are smiling so making fun small-talk is pointless.

i liked wal-mart better when it was woolco.

i dunno why they haven’t given us a target yet. canadians would be all over that shit. at least you feel better about yourself after visitting a target. after visitting wal-mart i feel really bad for the world and my teeth feel yellow.

and i never understood why the in doors are on the left and the out doors on the right. it’s so strange. what the fuck wal-mart?

and why are there ashtrays all along the exterior walls near the entrance? i know why they’re there, i’m being rhetorical here. wal-mart is saying that mainly poor people on welfare shop at wal-mart and poor people on welfare smoke cigarettes like crazy. that’s fine and all but they could at least act like fancy nonsmokers shop there also and take down those offensive ashtrays so it doesn’t look like a parkdale poolhall that i am walking into with my neice, come on wal-mart, you insulting piece of shit.

sometimes i just want to give up on words altogether.

take mike’s oscar quiz challenge and get everything wrong more than me because i want to win because i am selfish.

the top of my head is sort of platinum now and the rest is 8 different shades of malibu and my eyebrows are still dark so now i feel like wig-city and i don’t care.

car washes calm me down.

speechless.

sometimes i get the urge to make a whole new blog just to fiddle with a new template and put some sort of something clever title on it and specific google images that don’t mean anything and i call it the new shit the new space the new place to be for a little while and then i give up on it entirely but mostly it is because i was in the shower thinking of some random made-up story i thought would be endearing and i could have it up there and look at it like it was something that a whole other person wrote who was not me altogether and everything would be brilliant just like i thought when i was in the shower and i would link it and people would email and buy it completely and because it was written over there it would be different and new-feeling.

and then i think well i could just stop blogging for a month and save all that fake brilliance in a word document and cafepress it and put a new photo on it then sell it but because of this compulsion what is blogging i can’t do that and so i think that i will just write whatever the nonsense here like a post but it wouldn’t make much sense because say if i was writing as if i were a boy character or as a 12 year old, new random stumble upon readers would be like ungh?

but then i think fuck it, make a new blog, delete it, write the crappy word document, delete that, create a new post, keep it and pretend like you never wrote this bizarro explanation like you’re the avon lady. loser.

dear raymi

remember when I said I was gonna buy a shirt?

Well I was only pretend gonna buy a shirt.

Sorry.

But then I changed my mind and bought one anyway.

Even though I already have one that I made myself. Not the one I gave

away, but another one just like it. I wonder where that other one is.

Hmm…maybe in an exotic european hamper somewhere next to fancy dirty

foreign underwears.

I can’t wait to get it.

You are the best artist.

this blogger girl has a post about meeting douglas coupland, which

means that you’ll probably hate her, but i thought you might want to

see it anyway:

http://zenforlunch.com/bloggy/2005/01/coupland-o-mania-part-one.html

I’m trying to decide what clothes to wear today. In winter you can go

for weeks without doing laundry because you hardly sweat at all and it

seems like everything is always as fresh as the day you washed it. But

then one morning you wake up and realize that everything you own smells

like ass. That day, is today.

My web site has disappeared.

Fuck.

It’s gone.

Where is it??

what!?!??!?!??!

all my clothes smell gross

i dont even want to clean them

i have not washed my hair in 4 days

so today i have to do that

ungh

that coupland reading version was well written enough

i would have had a better conversation with him though

and i would have written it up in my blog like:

went to the coupland reading today. he read his book. there was a baby

crying and i wanted to scream in its face. i was too hyper to wait to

get my book signed so i left.

clenching ass cheeks due to 1.coldness 2. fear of ass-rape

My version would’ve gone like this:

Douglas Coupland spoke at the Barnes and Noble two blocks away from

where I work, two days ago. I didn’t know about it until today.

I’m sad and angry and frustrated that my web site disappeared.

I wonder if it’ll ever come back.

My hits! My hits! My poor, poor, precious, beautiful hits…gone. All

gone. Whaaa waaa waaaa….*sniff* *sniff*

what the fuck happened to it do you know?

cant u call the internet authorities? hang on i think i have bill

gates’ extenstion laying around here someplace or other.

james made that to help advertise my shirts. and my guns too. some of you have emailed and said you purchased crap but i don’t believe you because cafepress is fucked up sort of and says that i have made zero dollars so whatever. not like i am da vinci or anything anyways.