i didn’t get chinese food yesterday however after band practise i destroyed half a bag of chips and onion dip and then fil goes oh man i’m not even hungry but then he started eating and couldn’t stop and i was already feeling nauseous and bloaty on the couch drinking rum that his parents brought back from the dominican and forcing my eyes to stay open until 2am for the chapelle show.
you know there’s that type of person who when you’re watching something funny with and you’re suppose to laugh at a certain part and so everyone is laughing but the person has already seen the whatever it is you’re all watching so said person is anticipating the funny part and so when it happens and then that person explains to you why that part is suppose to be funny like you are retarded and makes you sure you all fully understand why you are laughing.
i am that person.
but not all of the time.
ok most of the time.
sometimes i get jokes more than other people do i think but then i remember that i am not the only person in the world who has seen television.
but then sometimes you’re sitting with a dumb person who doesn’t know anything about anything and then you explain to them why it’s funny and they are so greatful and you feel like the funniest most smart person but then someone else pipes up and corrects the shit out of you and you realise that something you thought for 5 years was wrong and it actually meant something else and so the dumb person witnesses this correction and they immediately lose all respect for you.
i have butchered bangs now, go 80’s! i did it with the kitchen scissors and tied a tiny hair elastic around the trimmings and am now accepting bids for raymitheminx.com’s first ever hair auction. tony got some kids to buy his shorn off afro so maybe one of yous guys can make a hair doll out of my clippings and sleep with it and then maybe clone me one day? staple it to your forehead?
i don’t expect anyone to actually want my hair btw though in the back of my mind, i do.
holy crap i love smashing video game cars. i have listened to the arcade fire’s neighborhood #2 (Laika) at least 300 times. my brother slept over last nite and gave me 20 bucks to have my bed so i took the futon. dreams are way more fucked when you sleep on couch-like futons. i’d describe my dream but well, no i won’t. i refilled my crazy pill prescription yesterday and there are a ton of do not drink alcohol with this medication stickers on the bottle. whoops.
so perhaps by nite fall i will have bangs and then come morning i’ll have razor wire in my wrists because i will hate myself for having diagonal emo bangs and the only way it will look right is if i arch my neck out and stare down like i am mysterious and brooding and only hang out in coffeeshops that don’t exist.
i haven’t washed my hair since i had it dyed friday. it doesn’t look like anything was done to it either. i still have a ridiculous splotch of dark roots on top of my head what the f. this also means i have 5 days’ worth of mascara on top of mascara on my eyelashes. tar city.
we have band practise tonite.
oh yeh i fell asleep cradling a small bag of doritos dill chips and when i woke up i finished the rest of the bag off.
jamie and i are writing a stupid book together and it’s not going to be cafepressed. it’s going to be something elsed. it’s a book for children with swear words in it and i am already insanely bored of writing it and thinking about it. it’s basically inanimate objects that suffer from low self-esteem and a caterpillar who goes to the discount supermarket and makes friends with the condiments and inevitably starts doing blow and becomes a janitor. uuuuunnnnghhhhhhhh.
i almost gave myself bangs yesterday and then i almost gave myself bangs today but my hair is too greasy to do a good job of it so i will probably do it tomorrow.
