see how dead it was? long weekend maybe or just, no one cares in the city?
brewsky.
full moon.
zit nation.
is that called irony? probably not.
lets take a better look. i think it’s called FUNNY AT THE TIME.
oh whatever.
i love the toy museum section in the supermarket by dave’s cottage. nothing ever leaves the shelves.
think i’ll do all my christmas shopping here.
asshole cape for the president, dave’s childhood costume.
as if any of this could be in order.
oh sage.
both lovely and effective.
nose plugger.
somehow, total mystery, every bag of chips were annihilated on the first nite, well all the ones i wanted to plough through anyway.
paula abdul asshole hat upon closer inspection is more latoya jackson.
tons and tons and tons of photos of beer mountain’s evolution.
pineapple express fowl-up.
natural.
dave took my advice and claimed that jacket for himself.
not allowed to ride this thing due to “cottage politics” ugh.
so attractive.
fil’s new shirt, same design on the back. HOT.
whups i fucked up your line. sorry.
evidently i am pretty concerned about it.
what could you possibly be taking a picture of now?
good call.
who cast these people and styled them? a triangle?
yes this is like jenga, only shittier. the die was missing. i have no idea if it came first or jenga.
the guys sabotaged me, i go to all the trouble of digging that stupid game out from under the stairs, wiping the dust cobwebs and dead spiders off it and one round it’s toppled from their (purposeful) shoddy block placement yeah ok fine lets all go back to alienating me with your fucking mafia wars never-ending discussions instead. so fun!
and why is this hedgehog a slut? eyelashes, eyeshadow, really?
and who dismantled my geese orgy?
i tried, shit doesn’t fit me.
wildly hung. i got fil to get me breakfast to go and i ate it lying down in bed with my fingers on my pillow like a total champ. moments prior i was dreaming about eating waffles and blueberry sauce and butter and blam fil walks in the room with breakfast. hoovered!
i am a complete dough head today and i am now completely ravenous. i want to ski down a mountain of singapore vermicelli. the gym called me AGAIN, this time it was the owner’s assistant i’m like DUDE relax i’m comin’ in tomorrow when i work out i’ll give you the fucking thing he’s all (euro) really for appointment? i say what? he goes you’re already a member? YES GREAT BUSINESS ETHICS! why don’t these scientists harass britt as much as they’re harassing me i swear, they call me more than anyone and no i am not flattered. dealing with someone who’s kinda stupid when you’re feeling really stupid (hung) yourself is exhausting. anyway i’m getting a bunch of weekly passes to hand around so let me know if you feel like susan powdering it with me for a few and maybe joining my gym so then i can save money off my monthly fee, then you can and on and on the end I’M STARVING LETS GO FIL!
so i passed out in the car with caked on blood. wicked. wait’ll you see my thighs and knees.
just before it happened.
ok now wash your eyes out here use this.
and this.
this too.
the owner of my gym is getting on my last nerve. i have to give them a void cheque so they can take my money every month, fine yeah i get that but why can’t they learn a little patience, i haven’t been to the burbs to retrieve the withdrawal form (same thing as void cheque) yet but will be in a couple hours, it was just the long weekend i’ve been busy ugh stop phoning!
+++
on october 10th i’m hosting a party with shake a tail so save that date. should it be cougar themed? anyway whatever come come come i have a secret message for all who confirm that they’re attending.
ps. only TWO people have sent in photos for my cutest photo contest, is there something wrong with you guys or something? just checking.
power cleansing my laptop battery something or other so hang tight chitlens! (fil put my battery in the freezer what huh?)
i totally bailed on the train track walk stand by me styles hahaha first thought a train was coming on our track (it wasn’t)(but a train WAS coming just on a different track) so i beat it down the side of the rocky track then later did a 360 flip tumble down the side just for fun? (i tripped) and completely scraped up my arms and knees, pictures to come. sober week!
you are barkin’ up the wrong tree i know NOTHING about other countries.
그리고 다른 나라에 대해 알고 싶습니다.
come again?
I will have a great time with you.
hmmm enticing…
난 당신과 함께 멋진 시간을 가질 것입니다.
????????
We will be talking about is a lot.
we will be talking about is a lot what? we will be talking lots, like girlfriends or you talk too much? pass.
우리에 대해 많은 대화를 가지게 될 것입니다.
ugh.
I want to be a very special friend to you.
thanks again, really flattered but i don’t have room in my life right now for more people.
난 당신의 매우 특별한 친구가 되고 싶습니다.
Let’s learn about each other!
guy just read my blog!
서로에 대해 배우도록 해요!
seriously what are these characters and who can even read them?
If you have the courage, you to contact me first.
look idiot YOU contacted ME first. you already made the contact i thought asians were supposed to be super smart.
만약 당신이 용기를 가지고 있다면, 나에게 먼저 연락 주세요.
From. JeeNee
one point for the dope name.
THIS IS GOING TO BE ME IN TWO MINUTES!
except in a bikini doing laps in the lake YES!
if you want to get dave to play one more round of lord of the rings monopoly with you all you have to do is roll him a huge spliff from his roach collection. can’t help it man i was desperate. sickitating i know.
oh yeah saw inglorius basterds at the cherry beach drive in last nite, great flick. didn’t stick around for halloween II though. that drive in is sweet but it’s a bit of a hike to the bathroom and kinda scary too. it wasn’t packed at all when we showed up (in fact we thought it was closed) and the lot was empty. totally different scene than the 5 drive-in, less funnies to ogle, more urban lame normies. oh and they check your car for brews so be careful, we stashed ours in our pillow cases and laid them down in the backseat, heart was racing like a motherfucker felt like going through customs i was acting all hyperly casual as in completely UNcasual dead giveaway but we made it huzzah.
new hairs. new hairs did. done did. thanks rose! (holy shit check out my calf told ya i’m gettin’ ripped)(that cougar kaftan is britt‘s)
look i went to this, above, from this, below. what a difference.
rose is a colour genius if you ever need something corrected GO.TO.ROSE. at brennen demelo even if it’s just a regular hair touch up, roots, anything, she’s amazing. 416.301.1072
in between i looked like this. JUST KIDDING omg you guys are so easy.
no i looked like this. another dress by britt. girl has dual citizenship so she goes stateside for crazy cheap deals on insano-dresses and gets over them in ten seconds. score for this guy.
did that little half ponytail pulled back thing boring sluts do, it’s like the mullet of ponytails.
brad had another show at the bovine last nite. i gave him a necklace i made, i promised him a long time ago i’d get him this necklace i had from my first bf – a super long chain with a metal worn down blue guitar pick on it, i have no idea where it went i might of had a moment of closure back when i was mental and gave it back to his sister, anyway, so instead last nite i took a bullet off a keychain and put it on another long chain i had. offered it to fil first in case i was doing a bad thing (i dunno rules, feels like there are rules in giving dudes who aren’t your boyfriend when you have a fiance jewelry?) but fil isn’t as flamboyant as brad ha. anyway YOU’RE WELCOME TIMES A THOUSAND BRAD.
i was afraid to take a picture of this guy he just seems kinda tough ass. i mean you’d gotta be with a hairdo like that no? i like to think he’d be into the notebook and scrapbooking maybe.
so we’ve had a lousy couple of days in these parts, the icing on top of which fil’s bicycle was fucking stolen yesterday. haitham the little angel that he is on the spot orders us up some jagermonster shots. wuh-oh.
ugh i hate this shit so much.
the nite’s events are about to change dramatically.
here we go.
oh man my stomach just flip flopped looking at this one.
exactly.
brad looks like frankenstein here.
YUM!!!! there you go make it your desktop wallpaper!
check fil’s flawless nose which is actually bright red with a rudolph zit on the end. i did a good job with the makeup no? today he’s even redder as he took a stroll while i was having my hair done, it’s the native in him, he could just think about the sun and turn lobster.
hanging on for dear fucking life.
see the bullet necklace take care of it guy, that’s been in my possession since i thiefed it off my brother when i was 17. BURN!
sorry bro.
then us three jagermonsters went to some douchehole on richmond called toiko? toika? whatever it’s where ex-ravers go to feel safe and E-out hard to strobe lights and shitty music. amy was there for some reunion and brosz7 decided it was a smart call to inform her she looked like a hooker. what a total moron that guy is, no filter whatsoever once he’s tanked. he’d probably tell you his credit card number.
then he does another shot in this rip-off sized glass. then fil and i bailed cos i got the hiccups and wanted to eat all the chinese food in the world but settled on tv dinners and muriel’s wedding instead and i woke up today wanting to diiiiie but i’m all good now i love you world!
this saved my ass today. vanilla soy is delicious. where does it place in fat comparison to dairy milk, is it 1% or higher?
dinner last nite, sundried tomato cheese filled whatever those things are, with left over rotisserie chicken, mesclun greens and this amazing spinach basil cream sauce fil’s mom made. fab-you-lous.
LOVE this song tons. know who also loves this song tons? JAGERMEISTER.
groupie sluts 101.
amazing ride surreptitiously parked out front of the bovine, awesome flat black paint finish. pompadour bad ass greaser owner wouldn’t let me take his picture on it though.
so settle on this american graffiti homage instead.
TIME FOR BED SUSAN.
then we went to swiss chalet?
balcony coors light time happy saturday amigettes!
fil claims not to know how to make wraps with the rice paper (guys are so full of shit) so i forced him to watch me do it.
this part is super important while waiting for the rice paper to absorb water from the damp towel.
ready to go bonus gross work out hair.
smear a little glob of super light philly cream cheese then throw on some mesclun.
throw in your filler (ours was rotisserie chicken with peppers, onions tomato zucchini zzzz etc)
add salsa. i swabbed the stove after all this was done, another thing fil claims not to know how to do so we go days and days with a messy stove before i finally give in. ugh MEN.
fil goes and you have to do that for each one? no dude, that’s when a magical fairy comes in and takes over YES HOW DID YOU THINK THOSE WRAPS WERE GETTING WRAPPED BEFORE!? so now he knows and has a much stronger appreciation for my culinary slavery.
and this piece of shit bit me on the forehead last nite.
this one’s a good one as nothing touches my hands meaning, someone else is mailing it ensuring you get it before 2010. anyway the prize is sweet, remember when i received all that harajuku perfume, samples, swag, purse, charm bracelet, etc and i selected a bottle of my favourite character? well YOU can get EVERY harajuku character/scent plus a bunch of swag too AND I DON’T GET ANYTHING!
so what do you have to do to win this shit? i’ve decided the competition will be who can take the cutest photo ever and i’ll give you two weeks to do it by. i will also be posting every photo as they come in then pool them all together in a post keeping my favourite picks to myself and will also be needing the rest of yous to help judge/critique each one so you know i didn’t cheat and pick an unworthy of cuteness photo.
requirements: be creative and simple, unique, think whimsically cute like a scarf blowing in the wind, emo almost. no babies, i mean fine send in a photo of a baby but you’re the only one who thinks it’s cute, therefore no win. pets are fine but that’s being lazy and also kind of in the baby department too. unless that pet is one of those japanese freak teeny tiny dwarf somethings with HUGE eyes, don’t bother. here is an example in my opinion of what a cute picture embodies:
there, top that and good luck. do you see what i’m saying? think cherry blossom girl style or inanimate objects in the vein of martha stewart, pretentious, rustic, homely, CUTE CUTE CUTE. now you can TAKE a cute photo or you can FIND one but if it’s found you must name the source. higher points go to those who take/create the photo/image themselves. this contest is open to those living in canada only (everyone else can help decide though too). or not whatever.
for more info you can check out hlcontests.ca and if you want you can host your own damn contest too.
xoxo good luck wieners!
send to raymi@raymitheminx.com subject line: CUTEST PHOTO EVER.
all of these could be yours. the holidays are just around the corner ya cheapskates!
ps. you can submit as many times as you like and as many pictures as you like too.
