greetings from planet luxury stress. no blogging today until i tidy up this sty. do you want a cat? who wants a cat? i was just going to text the teacher that we are giving a cat away but then they started being friends and licking each other on the couch and my heart broke, therefore if you want all these pets (me included) VACUUM THIS M*THERF**R ASAP.
we went to bed at ten it was the only way i could stop eating. i made jerk turkey sausage. i bought soy sour cream and it made me want to puke. never again.
this is how REAL i look when allergies have their way with me on a saturday afternoon, starving, hungover, depressed from the weather, emo from the hangover, stir crazy from how long it took to get out of the house to this chain resto for slug-like service, baby how tired do i look? LIE TO ME OR I WILL JAM THIS LIME WEDGE INTO YOUR EAR.
my two favourite nails were on the end, pink and ring finger. pinky broke and ring finger cracked, it always does. it’s ok though cos when i’m hyper-focusing on that hand the other one is growing and then i pay that one attention. people nurture their obsessive tendencies into full-blown enough already status. i’m doing a hand aging watch.
whenever i throw white peach crystal light into a drink i’ve practically ruined (saves every drink every time) that drink is then known as a BLOOD CLOT. yum. if we had grey goose here we’d call it a grey clot. ew.
pretty soon i will be needing a sunblock sponsorship. did you know how pricey that stuff is? i didn’t cos i never wore it before, only makeup on my face would be my defence.
the two B’s showed up afterall changing the course of action for our evening, which likely would have resulted in more eating. well it did but not in the form of in a restaurant as sundayte night tradition, i think eating period in restaurants is tradition enough. this fatty has to restrict and stick to it. today so far so good. is baking your own chicken wings a healthy idea? i think so. we could grill them OMFG why haven’t we started using the bbq yet? oh cos we’re lazy degenerate slackers that’s why.
i have a nude version of this. i am trying to tame this place up, should i? would doing that make people visit more or less often? i think i will be labelled as p0rnography until the end of time cos of all the garbage vocabulary on my blog so it doesn’t matter if i go topless. i pictured myself as a 56 year old tanned weird nudist poking around my estate unsexily cos often when i’m puttering around the house naked it’s nowhere remotely near lewd, or sexy it’s just, so papa of me.
maybe a solution in the future will be for me to show up 25 minutes later after everyone’s been seated but then i will just do the math in my head for the food still not being there +25 minutes so, no point. plus part of the fun is everyone stir crazily staggering and dragging one another in the streets finally out of the house. once in awhile you have to do the ok i’m leaving. ok i’m waiting outside. are you getting annoyed right now thinking about it? i am. it makes you hungrier and angrier and crazier like you were held in a pirates of the caribbeanesque cage for years and centuries it’s amazing how humans can go hostile barbaric so easily. i am the perfect candidate for a movie starring crazy jungle beast woman creature warriors especially if they coincide it with my period. i could be one of the monsters from the descent OMFG HOW SCARY IS THAT MOVIE so scary.
i am the most beautifat girl in the world. see how i was svelte this morning but a grenade here? i think i was constipated all weekend long. yum. anyway when you’re rocking bloat you have to go prettier. i needed to distract with dazzle camouflage, enter wolf dress melodie made from a large wolf tshirt.
i already need to clean the balls of my necklace. when i think of this necklace i think of bison burgers and get hungry (we went to stampede immediately after buying it to eat) and i cannot separate the two. i am an eccentric wizard of asininity.
i like this bread bag tie art. i like anything outlined, simple everyday objects one can easily identify. that’s how i started painting, with popsicles.
gave this to my dad. anyway, as is plain to see, people like simple and their knowledge in art is, minimal. hahaha sorry. i’ll do a post of all my art one day.
always have a younger version of you around to keep you young and on your toes. it helps if they are even more neurotic than you about aging and fat, makes me feel normal. i just saw a girl run by now i want to run to the supermarket. i think i will. i’ll call my dad to say hi first. maybe i could do that while running?
what was that sh*t you were talking about me again? that’s what i thought.
haha.
(ps. he’s lying, that is not as simple as you think it’s gonna be).
i love that TMR keeps it fresh and inventive for me. i love the variety, the team work and creative challenges, pushing myself, reaching goals, strengthening myself of mind, body, spirit and enduring a good hour of physical intensity. i even went for a jog with the dog today after all this. andrew said i did more working out today than i normally do, it’s the heavy weight competition that pushed me to go harder. makes you feel great. i was ready to give’r after eating a billion chicken wings on saturday and cupcakes at cherry cola last night and we finished one of those big bags of popcorn i made fun of the other day, like homer’s 6 foot long sandwich. the world stopped until we finished that bastard off and now it’s behind us so lets forget all about it please.
more of friday. yesterday was a complete write off, in part thanks to friday as well as the craptacular weather. all i wanted to do was watch teevee anyway so it was fine by me.
the longer she stayed the harder it was to leave. she was somehow going to go home then trek back for robyn. yeah, no chance there buddy, the sun, the open bar, the friday. it was hard to crank out the shitty posts what i did i was holding my breath the entire time and then blam done publish. blogging is a full body job sport. haha fully.
i have to exercise for it. i lie down blogging and don’t move for hours it’s incredible how fast you feel like you have rickets. think how many hours you sit in an office chair, same thing lying down bobsled styles, no, luge?
speaking of ridiculous i am kind of f–ing ridiculous hostzillaface now. i go big. teacher will text don’t go overboard then a few hours later he’ll receive “going overboard” i am addicted to planning buying displaying tidying then doing it again. it’s a form of escapism, like blogging, like any sort of activity or hobby. why do you think there are so many toronto fc fans? to get away from wives or to drink. we cannot go out to eat when a game is on because the people who spill in to the hood, that essentially was constructed just for them, there’s nothing wrong with these people it’s just the number of them. why am i ranting about this now? we waited forever for chicken wings at smokeless joe’s yesterday, they arrived luke warm. luke warm wings. NOT YUM! we ate them anyway. they comped nothing. we went pre-fc rush and still they couldn’t manage it. not enough chicks on staff on the patio. kind of takes the fun out of your chicken wing activity when it turns into chicken wing rage.
the revolution will be blogged. why is that saying the revolution will not be televised. snoop says it WILL be televised in plastic beach? i will listen to it now boy i wish i “knew” “things” looks like someone has a google vortex date coming up.
i am sitting out here now and it is glorious. wasps are buzzing around me from the juice pitcher remains at casa lazy. i ain’t scared of those things (yes i am) they’re not hassling me yet.
the non-break out face sunscreen i bought isn’t a liar, no zits. hallelujah. i can’t believe i spelled that right. now i will listen to that song. nah too downery. this is great though.
echo beach, when you go into molson amphitheatre/ontario place entrance, is branched off to the left instead of to the right, sand everywhere, volleyball nets, tents, wiiicked. my only suggestion is more porta-potties, especially in vip. one only? seriously? i held my wee all night long til i finally gave in, not fun, long line. teacher lead a pissing on the fence revolution, a story he retold a lot then i snapped yeah can you not do that in vip again or at least not storytell it THRICE thus forcing me to use it as material on my blog. another beer stand might be a good idea too the venue holds so many people, so many thirsty people.
my legs are getting longer. i am lengthening. on wednesday at TMR i’m getting a half hour stretch sesh with kash. did you know it’s possible to actually gain height? from stretching. i’m gunning for two more inches.
diamond rings was on before robyn. good tracks. dances all zippy. it felt like we were in a glitter bubble vortex, to the vibe of big primpin. aka amazing.
what shows should i come to/got to/cover for NXNE? i have a (priority delegate) pass and i don’t plan to sleep i am going to use the f–k out of it this year and i want to go to every single party there is and i am going to cover it around the clock/week, for this i will also require a blog slave or two and a lot of ephedrine. just kidding that’s illegal in canada, i don’t think i’ve ever tried it. email: RAYMI@RAYMITHEMINX.COM if you want me to come to your band’s show, and no not in the cheap seats thereof, i want press/proof of your caliber too. it is my goal this festival to crowd surf at something insane and get a legendary photo of that. am i insane? maybe. will it be worth it? who knows (yes). do i ask questions out loud and answer them? yes.
one of casie’s alter(act out)egos is to be borderline artistic. lets banksy this city. banksy stewart. hey now. kinda catchy (we’re working on a nickname a la raymbo for her, bequeathed by yours truly).
hot blond in red shirt sneered at me/us then became my secret enemy, she was like a shit together version of cheryl, friends with sarah taylor, whom she is standing with in this photo. i am creepy. ahahhaa. a past piece of fish mingled through the vip crowd, too afraid to approach me. i kinda zinged his heart a little. funny dude. emotional baggage, lousy lay, never called each other again. he wrote and asked for my number after saying hi nice to see me, i said why didn’t you come say hi, he said too awkward i said totally. i was too smug to go over myself.
teacher had to deal with two raymis haha. casie went up to him at the concert and was barking orders and he goes OH MY FU–ING GOD THERE’S TWO OF YOU. don’t think he minded much, made you look like a player. we were all pisstanked.
and then another snap, this guy grabbed my arm to pose with him, someone got possessive even though we (casie) had elevated this moment into happening. wasn’t a big deal.
the teacher got up to fight so to defuse naked shirt hugged him. casie got him topless for a cigarette, for one of hers. see how this all happened? haha.
going to cherry cola tonight early evening for the fundraiser party of the movie i’m in. i’ll be meeting the cast and i guess the dude i’ll be writhing on hahaha. meet us for a drink if you’re in the naybe and/or bored. it’s at queen/bathurst just north of queen on the west side. google it!
i text teacher I AM MAKING A SPECTACLE at certain junctures in time.
casie and i did a lot of DTD yesterday, working in the sun and somehow managed to piece ourselves together for the launch of echo beach at molson amphitheatre to see robyn. it was so fun. i had no idea it was going to be that awesome of a place. it is. even more so from the other side of vip, the right side. this one barista who serves teacher every morning at starbucks came up to him at our fence and said to me hey you’re in a cage and i says, no, YOU are then backed away dramatically. anyway if you watch this video over and over (like this one) like we just did you can see at least 300 different reasons to laugh. one example is in the very beginning where i go hey. pause. HI. behind the scenes magic right there. shit show hosts for hire.
long ass beasts. my minxologist has reminded me it’s time for another minxing. i’m going to get jacked on coffee and go through decals after this post.
and the lobster in his risotto can be tracked back to nova scotia probably from there but if one of you feels like seeing the adventure journey of something in my stomach on this rainy afternoon, go for it.
this post ended up being shorter than i thought and therefore more boring. meh. suicide saturdays game on!
thursday saw me meeting up with a mystery client in the library bar at the royal york. my decision. i wanted to have dinner afterward at epic, also in the royal york. i dressed like an escort, unintentionally so but then once paired by my client i looked like a full-fledged woman on the clock. i went with it.
i made him take pictures of me.
part of your work being a virtual salesperson gives you an opportunity to put all your skills to practise, sometimes people want to do business with you because of what you look like but you never lead on that that might have something to do with it instead turn the iphone to camera and strike it up. a table of texas oil tycoony types sat behind me and the one big shot loud mouth of the group didn’t notice me until we up and left then hollered, beckoning for me to stay, oh you’re not leaving are you? this is why i love the library bar. ballsy rich flamboyant drunks. i winked and sashayed on out of there.
avocado butter spread we couldn’t figure it out or recall what IF it was that (maybe asparagus?) but it was the champion.
the masters of the universe table of men traveled over to epic as well we could see and hear them the whole time, great entertainment. part of me wanted to join them but i knew that would go downhill fast plus i was in a business meeting.
i love old school fine dining.
the old school sexist waiters, not so much. my client said he doesn’t normally go to fancy restaurants so he didn’t understand why the waiter would wait for HIS say after the wine was poured or a plate was ready to be cleared, i’d motion and instruct that it was fine, i was clearly in charge here but not in oldschool waiter world, they take this shit seriously. i can offer my professional dating services in from of table etiquette and dining manners. raymi at raymitheminx .com hahaha no i’m serious.
yikes i look crazy.
the caesar salad i went back to epic for after FOUR YEARS of obsessing over it, verdict? not worth it. nowhere near as delicious as i boozingly romanticized it that night. oh well.
telling ya, scarf is the best versatile accessory.
not everyone can take non-blurry photos. i’m going to start bringing a real camera out with me. may as well get one for south beach.
ok now my blackberry pics. it’s raaaaaaaaining and pouring. more blog posts, more cleaning, maybe a fun trip to ikea for new cushions.
ps look! thursday JUNE 9 there’s a sample sale at nella bella. that’s the brand that does my flower clutch that is my currently rotated half part of the london bag. i am giving my mom the other half of it cos she is obsessed with the print or seeing it on my blog all the time has hypnotized her into wanting to BE ME more. heheh. everyone is obsessed with that bag. go get your own or one like it or whatever. bye.
