Girl Players on the rise; a new era;

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the following is partial-satire so don’t lose your cool ok.

Dear Raymi, you stung me a little bit. I just wanted to know why and how come I found out via your blog you were finished with me?

Now if you know who I am and who I hold court with you can get any and all ideas of which posse members I am referring to when I say about a month ago i piledrove a friend of mine like she was a cat in heat and I have never seen a fountain like that before, though I’ve never been to DisneyWorld so. Err, this is a little hard to write because it’s going against the conservative Toronto grain. I just don’t know what happened or when, but, it seems people are mellowing out and getting it on all around you. With each other!

When we go out for a night, I know that without a doubt, I must come out on top if I want to get laid this evening. I must dress better, look better, and be on my game.

Women beat men population-wise so we have more competition. This fact is made apparent when we go out at night. Suitable men we’d consider giving it to are few and far between and what’s more is they don’t fucking approach you. I am going to start referring to myself as butch aggressor because that’s how I feel when I speak to men. I am a completely different person now that I’m not engaged anymore. When I moved back to the city I would pick up a dude, a fucking stud top notch, DAILY. A new breed of woman is on the rise, men.

Not yet named but, for now we’ll call us “girl players”. I, am one of these prizes. A girl player is a mid-twenties urban force to be reckoned with, she is successful, coveted by marketers, parties, pr, events all that stupid fucking garbage. She’s fucked someone you love, someone with influence, money. She doesn’t fall in love because she has no feelings. Her real relationship is her career. She is focused and determined to beat you other women, and men, without question. It was a man’s world until we ate most of you and the other contender big players out there in our peer group, achieving as much as we do, do not exist because they followed the rock dream or make peanuts in whatever plebian creative field they went after. sorry.

I started feeling crazy by the tenth dude, a total ten, I picked up and was trying to juggle/manage along with the famous rock and roller with the enormous wang, the hot teacher, the hot famous indie professional, and so on, it was just, too much. I realized these semi-relationship entanglements were getting in the way of true love, destroying my perception of it. I was trying to pin down man players, multiples of them, at the same time. My ego knows no bounds.

So I lost my game or something and one by one I let them all fizzle out. I became human again. I focused on myself and my work instead, then I became a fucking animal about that.

Sometimes I forget that part of my career is hugely focused on being hot, being a parody of a person, with lots of platinum hair white teeth and sex. There are others like me, we hang out. When we go out, we get to use our notoriety to do whatever we please. It’s ridiculous. We never admit to competing in the business world together but in man world, in the jungles and dancehalls, after a long fucking bastard work week, I am going to fuck everything in sight and blow off steam all over that prey. If I can snag it first.

That’s all I have to say about that, for now.

(this was sex column practice).

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