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get the croaker

sass is back after her long work’ation in LA nice nice. more on that later but for now round II of stoner chat with spliffanie. happy friday pals!

me: pick a picture u want for your updated stoner logo
oh thats right i like hearing about drama class too

Steph: HAHAH
I WON AN AWARD

me: HAHAA
thats good
cute girls usually win stuff

Steph: i went to like, drama competitions

me: i went to my room and read fear street novels by myself

Steph: i read christopher pike

me: me too
they were better cos they had elements of sex

Steph: totally
pic sent

me: k
what one should i do

Steph: um one of the ones in the heart sunglasses?

me: ok
do u want a new stoner name

Steph: sure you have one in mind?

me: spliffy steph doesnt flow
no offense
i like it its just i dunno
you hate stoner steph?

Steph: stoney stephy?

me: omg are u mad at me
HAHA
stoney steph is great

Steph: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA
no
i was doing something else
hahaha i cant stop laughing

me: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA
im you!

Steph: right so funny

me: k is there something better than resin raymi
i feel like
“i feel like” in ryans voice haha
ryan doing steph
ew
i feel like some people dont know what resin is

Steph: HAHAHAHA
roach raymi?

me: what stoner words are there that begin with r oh brb ill get my copy of junky
roach is good

Steph: ummm

me: theres a glossary in william s burroughs’ junky of drug terminology
its dated tho
btw i like that u are jealous of the author of the book that u are currently reading

Steph: HAHAHAH

me: you’re like i hate you read read read

Steph: ya she’s funny and good and enjoyable to read, im almost over my jealousy
but not quite

me: and u wont share it either
there is nothing that starts with r

Steph: its called I Was Told There’d Be Cake by Sloane Crosley. what a name eh. but then she goes and makes fun of it

me: oh man i hate that way to win me over

Steph: i hate that too

me: is she a character out of babysitters club

Steph: baaahahaa i know
once i wrote a book that was a total rip off of sweet valley high
its hilarious

me: HAHAHA

Steph: print shop chapter title pages

me: ok my name is raymi the tea head
yours doesnt have to be an s word

Steph: k good that was cheesy
no offense
DONT BE MAD
jhahahahahaha

me: HA!
do u know what a tea head is
sorry i am old world bohemian

Steph: no clue

me: tea head, head, viper user of marijuana
chucks is excessive hunger
for sweets
heroin users get it
flop is a drunk passed out on a subway station bench
thats you

Steph: i think more people know what resin is then what tea head is

me: well theyll know once they read this

Steph: are you getting terms from burroughs?

me: yes
ok do u have a change?
stoney steph?

Steph: tea head fred
please

me: raymi the tea head fred
no im going to be raymi the tea head

Steph: no i want to be called tea head fred

me: i think you smoked too many roaches

Steph: so many rules man

me: haha
there are no rules
stephy the skid
like billy the kid

Steph: ug why do they all sound so gay

me: because they are?

Steph: hahahha

me: MARIJUANA MARTHA
thats your name

Steph: sigh

me: the caps lock didnt seal it

Steph: hahaha no

me: urg
ok last chance
or should we keep our names

Steph: no they’re gay
ummm

me: ok

Steph: im asking rye
he’s smart

me: ok

Steph: spliffanie
he’s a genius

me: WOAH
nice

Steph: i know

me: im jealous!

Steph: hahah ill ask for you

me: thank u

Steph: cannabis sativaymi

me: way too confusing

Steph: rollin raymi?

me: hmm
hahahahaha
funny cheesy

Steph: brb

me: ok we can wrap it up now burn out

Steph: did i annoy you haha

me: HAHA no
aw

22 thoughts on “get the croaker

  1. All your stoner chats bring back stuff from my childhood. Fear Street? Christopher Pike? Hell yeah. All in a box at my parents house, waiting for me to walk down memory lane…

  2. why does it have to alliterate

    Introducing,
    the madonna of marijuana
    a bud to all buds
    raymi “left-handed cigarette” laurennnnnnn

    and, in this corner,
    her bag of weed weighing 0 pounds 1 ounces
    the winner of after-dinner spinner
    stephanie “the stash” skidlingtonnnnn

    i had a friend named Browny Puko cause he always had resin on his teeth and he puked every time he drank

    have a good weekend!

  3. roach-a-raymi??
    rasta raymi????????
    rom jeraymi???
    reeferaymi?
    rollin’ raymi haha
    raymi the reefer
    okbye!

  4. how about loser lauren?
    orrrr gutter girl?

    really, this whole stoner thing because your life is a train wreck is far more entertaining than your attempt to be a hipster, oh oh.. ive been here twice this week…i must be “stalking” you.. hahahah you suck! … and how pathetic is somebody that has to be constantly seeking reassurance from their “friends” if they “are mad” .. lol… so sad!

  5. constantly needing reassurance from my close friend?? it’s an inside joke (that she started) you irrelevant turd from some metropolis of buttfucking nowhere you wouldn’t know urban if it licked your mangled genitals. hipster? pahaha fuck you. i don’t attempt things, i am them. whether loser or stoner. in my book, hitting a blog twice and feeling compelled to leave dog shit in the comments is v weak. what will power you have. this means you have less than zero friends to diss me with secretly and with dignity by. now that is sad, considering the internet. you couldn’t make one buddy happen awww sad face.

    ps. being famous and having a book deal does not = loser

    not to mention gorgeous.

    kill yourself motherfucker.

  6. when i see that someone posts a jerk-off remark trying to slam Raymi it is really disappointing that a person is so unhappy with their life that they want to try and hurt her feelings

    there are millions of extraordinary women in the world, thousands on the internet, hundreds of those in Canada, a dozen maybe who stand out, and guess what?
    Raymi still rules.

    like Howard Stern, a hero to millions because he dares to be more honest about himself than anyone else, makes all others look fake, all wimps
    so too, Raymi is a hero
    takes courage and faith to do what she does
    she treats all of us as if we were a personal friend, each post a private sharing to those she trusts.

    only the shallow and ignorant fail to see that each post is a gift, and she spoils us with her energy and dedication

    and oh yeah, did I mention she is one of the most brilliant writers anywhere

  7. Pingback: Raymi The Minx » Blog Archive » I know you better than you think I do

  8. Boys and girls: let us please, assume the full lotus position and begin with three deep breaths, paying attention to the tickling sensation on the outsides of the nostrils on the in-breath (similar to when snorting coke, but not the same)-

    The brief comments donnybrook that just passed reminds me of the scene in Poltergeist (Part 1) where the midget exorcist opens the closet door, looks into the gaping maw of hell and exclaims; “So much RAGE!”

    When are we, the collective we, going to realize that regular bowel movements are more important, in the long run, than fame/not fame lame/not lame, both of which are fleeting? In the meantime, if I may be sold bold, this is Raymi’s house, we are guests, let’s fucking behave that way! Sorry, Raymi, I farted…

  9. um i am gonna get told to kill myself? cause i am a long time reader (off line for last few days)first poster and it’s getting boring, and i know ii should have my own life and all that shit but really? it’s getting boring, and for the record i hated the whole break up thing that was other busy-bodyies shit to worry about like it was their own. im just saying like my friend’s do to me when i am self indulgent or straight up bo-ring – go do sommthing! you are fucking beautiful and creative and cool as shiiiiiit….

  10. you only get told to kill yourself when you go out of your way to hurt someone (who is already down). i’m sorry my piece of shit life is too boring for you now i am fully aware of the lost-novelty of suburban life, trust me. also, i miss my friend steph who lives hours away so this is how we fucking hang. if 4000 other people have to put up with it daily that’s their choice to come here no? i posted this daaays ago and people are still talking about it? not so boring afterall then, perhaps?

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