oopdate!

i just did wii fit for the first time in 63 days! ha more like WII FAT. did you like that? i just made it up. anyway, lo and behold i am not heavier than the last time i weighed myself on that scale of depression 63 days ago, i am slightly lighter. never declare to the internet that you lost weight because two days later you will feel like a cow. this period is taking forever to arrive i’ve been straight bloated for weeks it feels. sorry all i ever talk about is being wasted and my period.

i only came back on this shit machine just to share my wii joke with you.

oh and a lady almost U-turned into me on my bike last nite, i was pretty close to just veering around/alongside her sans bike dinging cos i assumed she would just blast ahead of me, thankfully i decided to be a bell nazi otherwise i’d’ve been a sailin’ palin. she slammed on the breaks and it jerked her up inside pretty hard she didn’t even check her mirror for shit and she burned it out of there like a bat out of hell something fierce afterward. crazy lady, she knew that i knew that the intense whiplash she experienced would have been how fast she’d have slammed into me and thus she beat it the hell out of there. near death experiences are kinda funny only in the sense that you’re like hmm what am i going to make for dinner tonite when do i put the vegetables in after how long the chicken’s been seared BLAMMO DEAD then you’re like cool if i would have bit it i wouldn’t have to study for that math test wahooo! it’s a reminder to take it easy and not rush your brains out all the time, put things into perspective all that oprah stuff.

garry shandling OUT!

ps. aren’t you happy as hell elina is finally off of antm?