i think it’s been awhile since i’ve shared with you’s guys a pointless some guy fucked up raymi story so here we go. i went to subway to get a sub for dinner despite fertilizer being in their wheat bread (the only kind i ever order)
If a sandwich is advertised as healthy, one would expect that the bread would be whole grain. Not so with Subway’s wheat bread. While it does have some whole wheat flour, it’s the third ingredient, listed just before high fructose corn syrup [4]. None of Subway’s breads are whole grain. Ammonium sulfate (a fertilizer) is also added. Unfinished sandwiches may be composted. The bread also contains azodicarbonamide. From Wikipedia,
Use of azodicarbonamide as a food additive is banned in Australia. In the UK, the Health and Safety Executive has identified azodicarbonamide as a respiratory sensitiser (a possible cause of asthma) and determined that products should be labeled with May cause sensitisation by inhalation [5].
Most of the meats at Subway contain MSG and/or sodium nitrite.
moving on, i did this because we were going to gabby’s to play trivia and i thought fertilizer is probably better than deep fried something or other or a mountain of nachos and i wanted to have food in my stomach to be primed for all the alcohol i planned to consume.
fil goes ahead into gabby’s and i am already having second thoughts about my sub cos there’s a bitchy chick barking at the “sandwich artist” to spread out her meats and demanding every single sauce on her 6 incher and the guy is taking a long time to get it right, and then there isn’t change so he has to go searching for a roll of coins and i am wearing my humongously obnoxious russian hat and it’s taking up all the room in the restaurant and by now two ginos come in and wait with me for this guy to finish up and serve me and then another tweedle dumb sandwich artist from the back room comes out with a box of change and snail’s pace unloads it all into the til meanwhile there are now two more people on top of the two ginos and me waiting to be served and i am doing my best impression of someone who isn’t an impatient fucking asshole.
i looked like this.
so the kid says hi sorry about that what would you like i say a 6 inch cheese and veggie on whole wheat and TOASTED which i can see throws the guy off comfuckingpletely because he gets a loaf cuts it in half puts the cheese on it and then sweeps it aside to begin serving the dude behind me, NOT putting it in the toaster thing which was his intention of multi-tasking, i saw it in his face and read it on his brain and so my eyes bulge out of my face as i am watching him painstakingly try and get two of those ready-to-go measured out chicken boxes onto the dude behind me’s sub and he’s delicately arranging them (by this point i am thinking he is for real retarded, or baked) and so then he sweeps THAT SUB aside and asks gino number 2 what he would like and i swear three minutes have passed since he first started my sub, i admire the concept of doing the assembly line bam bam bob’s yer uncle end result of having half-completed subs on the cutting board (if you can actually pull it off efficiently, which this kid wasn’t), but not when i have already been waiting long enough and i KNOW the kid intended to put my sub in the toaster but forgot and my not pointing it out for fear of looking like a witch, well, too late, so i go in librarian you are in trouble voice UMEXCUSEME! and hold up my hand then point at my sub and make a pfft/pshh exasperated sound in lieu of words and i already feel like a dickhead because my hat is the size of lake ontario and now i am scolding a pimply faced retard.
a lightbulb goes off in the guy’s head and i say can you toast that? and he goes ok then asks what i want on it and i know the window of toasting-opportunity has closed cos they toast the sub with cheese on it only THEN do they load all the toppings on it so i say fine and tell him green pepper lettuce tomato red onion a teeny bit of mayo and sub sauce and pepper, which takes a hundred years of course and the other tweedle dumb is pulling on a pair of those gloves and everyone on my side of the window is like thank godding in their heads and they totally heard me say toast it but see that it is not being toasted and i feel embarrassed for all of us.
i went down being the bad guy to save 4 other people and no high-fives were handed out, i angrily inhaled my sub in the corner even though i wanted to do the storm out and i could see everyone looking at me in the reflection of the window, i couldn’t do the storm out cos i don’t think gabby’s lets you eat subs at their bar.
that was my last subway experience way to go out like that holy shit, i was so bitter i shared some honey garlic wings with christie at gabby’s after that.
moral: don’t fuck with people when they are starving.
