jana is more talented than you or me buy her shoes, request some LOOK!

there are two more kinds on her blog, if you buy some i will let you come over and brush my hair and listen to neil young. JUST SAYING.

look i just made this whimsical little dude.

yes that is an emperor pin that noel gave me, yeah i don’t know anything about them either other than i made fun of them once on my blog and some metal geek completely lost his mind over it so if you buy this guy you would be holding a piece of blog history in your hands. i think they broke up. anyway, there will never ever be a shortage of material for heavy metal jokes.

his name is ruby and he is into gambling, sailing, and enjoys the musical stylings of john tesh.

if you are interested email me at raymitheminx@gmail.com don’t try and barter with me in my comments that’s tacky and embarrassing and shows that you are not serious at all but a 20 year old dickhead with no class, or money. also, if you want to special order one of my retarded creations and/or have suggestions/a request, or also want a painting done on commission, lemme know.

+++

every month or so, keith sends me an over-analytical, arrogant, novel-length email, criticisizing me or you guys or whatever, here is one he just sent, try not to let it make your eyes look in opposite directions. it’s not that i am unintelligent and lazy, i dunno, i feel like the dude is a bit unstable. i appreciate the effort and thought put into writing me this buuuut…. ungh. here is a blog post of his that is obviously about me.

dear raymi

brave? nudity

the last picture in your most recent post is actually a sweet picture, the movie poster all hazed up, the light glowing, the nipple, it worked out well.

aside from that

i was badgering you in earlier emails because i believed that seeking out attention was trite, and subsequently i believed that trite behaviors were to be avoided at all costs… which may be true, but now i see that as far as humanity, and general social existence, is concerned… seeking attention and getting it, in the way that you are, is merely an undeniable part of the social landscape. and my desire to see you use your literary talent in a way that transcends diarist blogging is just like hoping for any number of idealistic absurdities. i.e. communism or utopianism. because the sort of pursuit i envision with your talent might not be as advantageous for you as flexing within the model that has been proven to provide you with a version or a variant of what it is that you seek.

in essence, i am scum. and i have been looking for your attention all this time with these emails when i have been taking issue with the fact that you engage in the pursuit of attention and instant gratification. try not to forget that i know i am scum in all this. i dislike the fact that people idolize so quickly, however this is, again, a natural part of the social landscape considering that you play the role of…. say… a star athlete to a sports fan, to the people that enjoy reading quick-witted pop-culture critiques and quasi hipster-life stories. idolatry is just a brute social fact.

there are some problems with the issues i have taken up, i couldn’t possibly know the extent of your goal set, and i have no way of proving that the things i am calling trite are ultimately negative. but despite the fact that i realize holes in my argument and despite the ridiculousness of my choice to email these almost-diatribes… i think that there is something completely fucked about the dynamics of the cultural world that allow for your blog to be considered good entertainment. it certainly takes talent to do what you do, but talent doesn’t always translate in to a quality product. In comparison to all the diarist blogs that i have seen yours is by far the most engaging, but the nature of the thing is that you are providing details from your life to satiate the entertainment appetites of other internet lurkers. There are no achievements that come from reading your blog, it is more of a giddy laugh because of the way that you turn a phrase or the way that you view a given situation, but without fail those things provide people with a norm base that puts them no better off in relation to moral issues or general conduct issues, the normative framework your blog provides is based off of your version of cool… and that sort of thing can fuck with the reader’s head without them knowing it, and they are getting fucked with without reaping any benefit, of course that happens when they watch advertisements and MTV, but i am grouping you with those other things as a negative… in other words when they read your blog they are just numbing up for a while… like reading the davinci code or something along those lines.

if you assume the stance that you usually do upon receiving my emails you will respond with a sentence or less, which is probably warranted considering the difference in our respective styles, but i would like to hear what it is that you think about the idol loving and the normative structure you provide others (it really seems like a comfort-food variant to me) because you get to experience it from a completely different angle… i know you are smart enough to see the over-arching trends. i have jumped to my conclusions already and that is why i seek the opinions of others, to get me to see where the value lies… to provide me with some detail from a perspective that i have no access to. i am not looking to post anything anywhere. this is simple curiosity and moderate attention-seeking.

-Keith

ok so not from the exact same nite but here is when i stupidly went blond, some days i liked it, most days i didn’t. i am really into memory lane right now for some reason.

clenching my winter ass.

napoleon dynamite dance.

that’s me using dial-up + aol to email some files at my brother’s work it was so boring and slow. good thing i could watch price is right and shoot off fire extinguishers ‘cos they had slow leaks.

ok it’s tiny but the one below is from the nite everyone was complimenting my greasy crimped bedhead garbage hair.

and this one is the day i fucked up my black hair (moments prior) and dyed it myself then had to fix it profesionally the next day sigh.

moron.

oh i transcribed this post out of generation x, enjoy.

hmm looking at that is kind of where i am at right now, the beauty before the storm.

you can tell i’m riding the red tide cos the bags under my eyes get super crescent-indented deep. i am trying to look dead in this series, something i used to do on webcam for perverts and speaking of…

i wanted to try out being “sporty” this cycle. so far so good.

HAHA nice comment.

do u ever thought of being a porn-star?
lacky | Edit comment Delete comment | 09.18.07 – 12:16 pm | #

actually no but i already have done some pornish things in my life and i feel like doing something like that again would be going backwards, not to harp on women’s career choices or anything i don’t want some long boring ethical debate about the sex industry (zzz) anyway, no, you will not be seeing my gash anytime soon, unless you are hustler magazine or playboy and have mountains of cash.

oh and re: pornish things, i was a webcam girl, i did not do porn, i did not fuck bros and make dvds.

pillow dress come shirt.

i have a zit on the right side of my chin and it is making me look like rumer willis cos when i look in the mirror i jut my chin out in this rumer willis jug jaw way and then i kind of high five myself in my head for looking like a c-list celeb. wait is she b-list? anyway i am not going to get an alien haircut so don’t worry. everyone is all worried about me getting streaks it is kind of sweet like we are all in highschool together smoking cigarettes and no one can make a change w/o consulting the other 8 of the crowd. except i was never like that in highschool so i am going to get streaks anyway. it will look really pretty and i can get away w/o washing it everyday cos the blond hides the grease. i bathed yesterday with my hair up then went out like that and couldn’t handle it, fil liked it. i haven’t had my hair piled on my head in ages so i had to take it down and looked like sloan from ferris bueller, all greasy flipped over wave. you need some hair-up practise before going out into the world, maybe i should invest in one of those retarded bra strap head bands? i HAVE to get streaks cos my hair looks super greasy if i go one day w/o washing it and it can be all garbage messy unwashed and people compliment the hell out of it. i did this hosting event thing a few years back and all these fashion people kept talking about my hair i will find a picture in a minute of the exact nite out.

i just cut my pillow dress into a shirt i am a good idea here‘s some haikus i wrote in 2005 and here is fil as jeff from today’s special.

haha a convo my mom and i had before she started blogging. the comments are still there for the post too.

OH NO
i can really giv’er to this song, but not so much this time. i may or may not be drunk. for some reason i was feeling shy.

garden rose
pretty fucking amazing if you are able to wait it out ’til the very end ha.

me: oh man this song i am singing (garden rose, second video, band is lavender diamond whom i love and we hung out with once and they are from LA so if you live there, stalk them.)
brutal
i look fucking retarded

Phil: haha

me: like im trying to be whimiscal and delicate
but i just look like a drunk witch

Phil: hahaha

me: im like waving my fingers in my face to show off my polish
it doesnt translate

Phil: hahahaha

me: oh and then my voice is cracking
u made me feel shy
oh and now i am trying to sing opera

check out my brother checking out my nubs.

sorry but i am super fucking into my nails right now i am looking forward to doing another coat i just might go and buy up the rest of the colours too.

albino eggs!

yes i wear that sweater 7 days a week now.

mesquite injection.

dinner at fil’s mum’s.

oh good news, she went to a psychic and the psychic said me and fil are getting married and having two kids! ha.

her second little baby thing arrived too, this one is uglier than the last, the other one’s eyes are at least closed.

look at fil’s mercury filling, OLD!

oh just perusing the baby catalogue.

ew get away creepy ugly desperate girl!

labradorABLES hahaha.

before that we met up with my dad.

he had that mmmmm.

i was starving my balls off so had a grilled cheeser, right before dinner too. fil just sat there starving.

hey at least it was on whole wheat. pfft.

okai bai.