neil/noel and i use to date. he remains friends with all of his ex-girlfriends. we are forming the ex-girlfriends club where we get together and shit talk noel. ok where we get together and I shit talk noel. noel dumped me over email, i guess we were barely dating, i say it’s his fault cos he was the first to initiate the super gay annoying coupledom crap. i posted the email on my blog when it happened and the subject is: you will hate this email. then i flew to nyc and hung with jamie and did lots of cocaine. no hard feelings noel!
i’m serious. i am not being sarcastic here. i just read back my post and thought wow that was suppose to come off as funny but it just seems bitter.
i’m attempting to distract myself.
i think i should start a noel’s secrets blog and every sunday i will publish a magical noel secret!
i’m beginning to care less and less about my blog. no no don’t cry. yet! after rambling to aimee about this and that for awhile she said WOW it sounds like you really hate your blog.
then i thought about it some.
yeah, maybe i guess i do. or maybe i just hate myself or the direction i’ve steered this thing. it seems every march i get all contemplative and insanely self-absorbed, don’t forget the insane part!
i’ve successfully turned myself into a novelty fine though i pretty much have felt that way my entire life now it’s just, in blog format too. people who are wallflowers are uh, useless? make yourself useful in social situations. do you get what i’m getting at? different people have different skills. some are scientists some are flower arrangers or trapeze artists, and others are drunken morons who tell fart jokes to make 45 year old women laugh at 2 am at the horseshoe. that’s me, that’s how i survive and that’s my “use” basically.
when i’m prattling on about raymi this internet that and facetiously decree I AM FAMOUS to random strangers at the bar or I AM A BIG DEAL they don’t get if i am serious or sarcastic or lying – i don’t even know anymore to be honest and hence the not caring about this blogthing – once you stop caring that’s when cool shit happens.
anyway.
it’s just a fucking blog. or it’s me. the blog or me.
