today i will finally do laundry and there better be enough of those dryer sheets to go ’round and detergent otherwise i am not doing laundry.

any/every chance i get to delay the inevitable, i take it.

but then when i am walking around looking at mountains of clothes i start whining and sighing obnoxiously and people go you STILL haven’t done your laundry!?

and i say well it would be done if YOU did it for me you selfish fuck!

so, yes, it is pretty much that time of the month so i am very funny and charming one second and then i am gargamel from the smurfs a second later and then i am splinter from ninja turtles, all calm and shit and then i am snow white… i don’t know how to finish this tangent.

anyway.

so i am drinking and eating a lot and watching movies and being boring and having quite a lovely time ‘cept i am repulsed by my stomache, not that it has changed significantly, it’s just, water/beer weight, i suppose.

and i am always saying ok i am going to do sit-ups. tomorrow. and then i don’t.

and then i say ok tomorrow i am doing sit-ups.

and then we go to the bar and order greasy food and play megatouch for eleven hours and hang out in mack’s garage and drink more and put nails in the shelves and take the bolt cutters to everything and, cut stuff, and then valerie comes in and is uhhh why does it smell like you are painting in here? and i have caulking on my fingers and i am wearing a protective mask on my head and we are standing on fancy-expensive wood and fil is like, hi, we were uh, building you something?

best post ever.