shawnraymi is coming over with a hamburger and smokes. i wanna go for a run mebbe he will go too. maybe he will have fireworks. he usually has fireworks. i have my drug addict hang-out session later today. i’m voting conservative. me and dad are. and schrader i think. angelo is voting ndp, figures. heh. rick byers (conservative) looks like jfk too duder. i hope i don’t sleep thru voting. i wanna see dodgeball. i want my friggin bikini back. i want my whole body to be one fucking color. it’s pretty annoying that people’s heads are being chopped off. fuckin frig. well looks like they’re gettin’ ahead in life but it’s not something to be head-strong about or basically be all braggy and lose yer head over it. ok sorry. really i’m fucking mad as hell about this crap and if it were going on a year ago when i was mania mania mania i would be so not out of bed or even in the real world i’d be hospital-city where i basically belong. my mum wants to put me away in this 30 day rehab thing. i know i would just lie in my bed crying the whole time at nite. that’s when those places are toughest to be in. so tough at nite. so lonely. so sad. i think about doing this rehab thing just for material to write about. i’d write a whole damn book. the first institution i was in wouldn’t let me have my spiral-bound notebook but they let me have a pen. i fucking hate horsepitals.