I am so hungry right now i could eat a fig newton. Now that I am done taking dumb pictures I will get dressed and go out to eat greasy eggs and cheese with sour cream, YES, with sour cream. I stayed up til 6am reading my blog. I totally felt sorry for myself. Another thing i quite enjoy is Bccing myself when i email people and then i re-read my fantastic responses to people and think, man, that person is so lucky to get that email from me.

ahhhhhh cigarettes. video games. kitty cats. hash. boys. girls. chocolate bars. cheese. karaoke. 40’s. coconuts. cornish hens. costumes. pictures. supermarkets. change machines. best friend necklaces. vintage cycle shirt. on-coming traffic. cellular phones. the club district. security guards. fin.

Jamie rules because he draws all those paintings I post of hot half-naked girls and he also likes Hello Kitty and likes to complain about stuff and he rode a bicycle in Amsterdam and he is also in love with me and tells me how cool i am all the time.

I hate these girls but i love them so much. I want an empire, dude – magazine, video games, clothing line, crappy tv shows and movies and books and gahhhhh!

I fucking love laundry, no, not doing it, not rushing home to do it or worrying about doing it and then delaying it for weeks and weeks, I love it when it hangs all around my room on hooks and nails and doorknobs after F I N A L L Y doing it. And i like smelling the armpits of shirts that no longer smell like stank and also the crotches of pants that still smell like mysteriousness. I am so psyched to wear this shirt i haven’t worn since August to the Glad-fucking-stone tonite. Yep. it’s true. Karaoke.

biznitch.

RAYMI’S MOM on Positive/constructive Expressions of your Anger

-aknowleding and validating your anger

-physical activity while visualizing your anger being released and expelled

-visualizing positives

-journalling letter rutal music, self soothe

-rest and recoup

-state directly “I” vs you statements

-invitation to talk

-relaxation and deep breathing

-reconginze that your anger is telling you something

-laughter

-crying

-talking to someone

-recongnizing the feelings under the anger

-hurt loss sadness non-acknowledgement

-resentment

-disappointment

-time out

Things I can do with my anger

-knitting/crafts

-drawing,painting,finger painting

-letter writing

-listening to music

-garden work

-snow shoveling

-being by water

-listening to relaxation tapes

-walking dog talking with pet

-pause

-be aware of what is happening in your body and what it needs

-counting to 10

-silent screaming

-running

-20 minute workout

-pottery, breadmaking

-hammering nails into boards

-throwing stones in the water or a fence

-racquetball tennis sports

-pounding a pillow

-screaming (not at someone)

-spraying silly string

-heavy duty cleaning/scrubbing

She left out: punching people in the face, chainsmoking, sucking on bottles of scotch, setting things on fire, screaming at small animals and children and kicking dogs. Meh. Honest mistake.

This is what my hair looks like after not being washed for three days. Funny, not so different from when I actually wash that shit. buh.

Ok, so i’m not getting married. I lied about that. It was good to receive twenty pieces of email on the subject, however. You guys are so silly. You believe anything I say. That’s great. Here is something that is one-hundred per cent true – I found a Nigerian Boyfriend. It makes me so happy!

I have an earache and cramps and my room is destroyed and I have 130 dollar steve madden boots and a trillion dollar cell phone and spent sixty-three dollars and twenty-three cents on a hat and a scarf and yesterday I got so much sleep it was disgusting. Buuuuut i have this new girlyfriend who calls me! Woah. And she is going to make me a turkey sandwich and let me watch cartoons at her place before i go to work. SNAP! At first she hated me and so did her other friend but now they like me and laugh at everything i say. almost.

This dude keeps coming over to feed my roommate’s cat because me and coolhandluke (yes he lives with me now) are too dumb apparently to do it ourselves. She has decided to move out already to this place across the street. i kept being cranky and saying, no you can’t smoke in here because i am allergic to it and the girl upstairs has/had cancer. So the girl who is making me a turkey sandwich is moving in Nov.1 and Coolhandluke moved in a week ago. PARTYHOUSE 2002! However I do miss my other roommate who moved back to Scotland. He was super, chill and if something went on fire he would be all, meh, whatever and throw it in the backyard. sigh.

I have a mentor who is helping me be focused on writing The last Minx. He sends me emails that say, “Good. I want you to know that what you are doing is very good and I think you should keep doing it.”

today i was attacked by two cats and then my vitamins fell out the window and tomorrow i’m going to get married.

I can’t stop picking my nose and wiping it on everything in sight. Who’s going to that gaymodcrawl? i think i’m going to buy a polaroid camera and go around charging people 5 dollars for a shot of them and their stupid fucking dumb mod friends. YARRRR! i am going to be SO rich!! I don’t get how everyone is all, I fucking hate mod club and Blow Up etc etc but they are still SO into that scene and rockin’ out and all around being too cool to talk to one another.

TTYL!

Ok so I’m super-amazingly-offensive and like, a real crazy slut bitch and everybody hates me when they first meet me and don’t start liking me until 2 or 3 months later after they realise how fucking sarcastic and boastful i am and learn that i am never ever serious and even then they still hate me. Whatever. Most people really enjoy believing everything they read from this site and thinking that in real life I’m all zany and obnoxious (which i am but not 24/7) and i jump onto tables and kick babies in the head. I’ve been offending people all over the place forever. I was confronted by this girl last week for saying, “who are these bitches?” as in, “who are these ladies who have joined us at our table?” She’s all, “Aren’t you the girl who called me a bitch!?” I’m all, “Yah but in a nice way. ha ha. get it?” Evidently not everyone is as smart as me. No one gets it. I should just, not talk. Ever. Maybe to taxi drivers and that asian dude on the milkcrate down the street but, fuck, making friends is hard. Such a commitment. I can’t even get waitresses to like me. Not even if I tip them 50%

fuck people.

sometimes my pictures just won’t load. deal with it.