Ok so I’m super-amazingly-offensive and like, a real crazy slut bitch and everybody hates me when they first meet me and don’t start liking me until 2 or 3 months later after they realise how fucking sarcastic and boastful i am and learn that i am never ever serious and even then they still hate me. Whatever. Most people really enjoy believing everything they read from this site and thinking that in real life I’m all zany and obnoxious (which i am but not 24/7) and i jump onto tables and kick babies in the head. I’ve been offending people all over the place forever. I was confronted by this girl last week for saying, “who are these bitches?” as in, “who are these ladies who have joined us at our table?” She’s all, “Aren’t you the girl who called me a bitch!?” I’m all, “Yah but in a nice way. ha ha. get it?” Evidently not everyone is as smart as me. No one gets it. I should just, not talk. Ever. Maybe to taxi drivers and that asian dude on the milkcrate down the street but, fuck, making friends is hard. Such a commitment. I can’t even get waitresses to like me. Not even if I tip them 50%

fuck people.