Yesterday your fearless hero went to the zoo (where she belongs) for the annual Seafood for Thought eatathon. My third year in a row! I am a important people! Here’s last year’s post: Seafood? I see food I eat it. Funny how some people don’t know I’m “a foodie” yeah I’m all over the place I get that but it’s true, I have reviewed quite the amount of restaurants over the years so I kinda know what I’m talking and eating about.

Tickets to the rain ball and man, did it ever rain.

As you can see it was quite summery weather save for the monsoon so we dressed appropriately & although it Noah’s Ark dumped forty days forty nights style, it was still hot out.

Too hot for a bra even so I Sharon Stoner’d it.

A taste of what was to come except we did not taste Stingraymis™ as they are not for eating but for petting only. They are scary looking things and I was most brave this year thanks to Rebecca’s fearlessness rubbing off on me. She grabbed this one shark and held on for awhile so I copied that. It was a lot of fun. We got soaked again. If the rain won’t get you the stingrays will.

Colleague, ever the s-disturber, told me some women were giving me major stink eye when we passed because of my outfit. Well I’m sorry it’s summer ladies. I’m sure you watch all kinds of sluttily dressed shows and read celeb gossip mags where they are dressed hotter than me and you don’t think twice about it.

Line skipping. Baby doesn’t wait in lines.

Rebecca said we matched (cos of my camel toe) she burned me many times on that and I fell in to the trap each time. I can’t help how these shorts were designed, they’re Bettie Page and since high-waisted 50’s technology has not been advanced to avoid c-toe, don’t blame me.

She wore those earrings in honour of Lady G.

Ferret Bueller.

Act natural everybody!

I did not touch it. I didn’t see the point. It was grooming itself anyway.

This chick is from the old neighbourhood, was nice running in to her hi Jenn! Oh I got stories lol.

Woah easy neck veins!

Wine me up. I wish Cheese Boutique‘s tent was attached to this one during the downpour which turned me in to a sucky pants. I am scared of thunder and lightning. Laugh all you want I have sensitivities. I deal.

First thing in my mouth was yummy ceviche. Can you remember what Raymbecca? If there’s no picture of the resto to go along with then my photographic memory can only go so far.

What kind of fish is this?

But of course.

I rule therefore I am.

Hello old friend.

We had moments to choose where to find shelter not wanting to accept that it was actually going to happen. Self-delusion is one of my strongest skills.

 

This corn chow was delish and warm and that was the crack of thunder cue to get a move on.

It was claustrophobic under that tent and scary and windy and wet but we kept eating and drinking and partying through it nothing like group camaraderie to get you through a rough patch and I apologize to anyone I might have annoyed with my whining.

The woman to my right was going to make a run for it and I stopped her. Are you kidding me? She stayed and ate with us once she turned around and saw how much it was coming down. Where were you when it rained yesterday?

The worst of it wasn’t even photographed cos obvs it was too wretched to do it.

It was a funny situation and bonded all of us, I liked that part.

Knew I’d eventually get drenched, wanted to maintain my hairdo and makeup. Never give up my pretties!

LOL NEVER GIVE…UP.

Fanciest downpour.

We should have grabbed a bottle of wine. We were stationed beside Steamwhistle but Rebecca is allergic to wheat. I drank one for her because I am a good friend like that.

I kept myself together despite my wimpy faces. I was scared! I thought the tent would blow away or someone (me) would get struck by lightning. One of the singers of the band said they thought they were going to get fried up there. I believed ya!

You had to laugh though. It rained for a bit before we arrived too. Rain pockets. Driving to the zoo seeing the scary sky made me worried what a ninny. Just knowing you can’t do anything about it makes me uncomfortable. It exhilarates me for sure but it still scares me okay bye don’t tell anyone.

It just kept raining.

Then our friend Jason shows up by umbrella escort well la-dee-da.

I only cracked one or two global warming jokes what, raise awareness people. No one seems to care anymore? Wait ’til the next election maybe.

Two jokes about walrus global warming and no laughs. Just one soggy tumbleweed.

Fine. Beer time.

Wet t-shirt contest everywhere.

Here’s when diva Raymi came out. People kept appearing in garbage bag raincoats and I wanted one NOW and no one knew how they were getting them nor could I walk to find out in the rain and Raymbecca had me on IGNORE and walked away with the umbrella. O’RLY?

Ahhh relief. I couldn’t believe one guy had the audacity to say he needed them for his entire group. RUDE. You give me one and I go get you a stack buddy. I had my party enemy now, all set. I did not see him again after that lol.

How do you feel special or stand out when everyone’s in the same garbage bag as you? During my temper tantrum I finally went to storm off in to the rain and my flip flop got stuck to the wet ground. FOILED! It was funny for everyone watching and already irritated by me (colleague) I just didn’t understand why he wouldn’t go and get me one already!

All better now.

Rebecca went to culinary school with Trista (who was on top chef and made it to 6th place!) and so she was acting more mature than me or like, yeah, all business when I was like hot wet cute mess, I got this, I “know” these people don’t even worry about it haha.

We’re a cute pair though. I see us as old future potatoes together complaining and yelling at each other. She’s my Lois, mom!

And THIS fricking picture are you kidding me? I can’t stop laughing. It’s like only raining on her thanks to the cloud behind her and it looks like a kid’s show for weather. SO funny.

Cut eye problems now solved.

I got two more ponchos for the road. Awesome. Only come in handy if pre-stashed in a purse.

Look behind me now…

Don’t judge, she’s so us. She’s our people.

Wet posh people everywhere. Loved it.

Well hi there Albert (Le Select). I got them some beers, then brought food back to Mill St. tent then went to get wine for myself and then I got slammed in to by the guy carrying way too much. Seriously if I was more of a VIP diva bitch elsewhere I’d have made a stink, I was able to stop myself from sheer will alone to not want to fall and it almost tore my flip flop apart from the wet ground suction.

Yummy nummies.

And there I am with the beers, purple shirt is blocking me and was the whole way.

Colleague said he could only tell me apart from the herd by my pink sandals.

See the four red boxes? That’s what walked in to me. My hood obscured my view and I was walking in such a direction he came at me from my left BOOM. They were just wondering where I was too and SMASH. EVERYONE laughed and stared. A few inquired if I was alright, I was shaken and in shock, glass everywhere.

Bech and colleague came to my aid, it was funny, yes laugh totally but they could tell I was upset and then I burst in to tears and said LADY GARBAGE. After the rain and that and the wine glasses stupidity it all finally bubbled over.

And then like with all glass shattering incidences I felt a phantom piece in my foot that wasn’t there thankfully.

And this is what it looks like when minxes cry.

TO BE CONTINUED!