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i love that i get to re-experience this night again on this beautiful(ish) saturday afternoon. these food features of mine get me pumped about my next meal, i fantasize about eating immensely, namely, what can i next eat that is delicious and nutritious? people think they live day by day, no, try, meal by meal. i shall live to dine another day and because i have messed up eating restrictions and meal plans always, the next meal will be linner, for breakfast. followed by tons of snacks. i think snacking should have its own meal name, i feel the majority of people too busy to sit down for meals, snack more than the former and if that’s your main style of consumption, that’s not snacking, it’s eating. i will get back to you if i think of better terminology for this right, sometime, ever.

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we begin at the bar to have a cocktail, the place is packed and bumping, good vibe, happy faces, welcoming, efficient. every table spoken for. a couple gets a table ahead of us which i don’t mind, i like to wait for the perfect table and it’s a thrill when it pops up, cos you don’t know where it might be. every spot has a different vantage point and even though NOBODY puts baby in the corner, sometimes the corners are best.

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kept trying to time the photo with the wine fridge door opening, it cast a baseball stadium light beam on to me, a portal to another dimension of suntan booths worlds over.

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suffice it to say, one of us was not very good at timing this apparent challenging feat which i am incredulous by, as seen here. i am a pro, you have to be ready and waiting with your finger on the trigger, yes i am using hunting analogies (presently reading affliction by russell banks and it’s deer hunting season in new hamphshire right now btw)(nerd boner alert, lulz) for photography, is there really a difference aside from the outcomes? by one means, the subject shot is pierced by bullet, by the other, our subject hopefully gets a nice portrait sitting at a bar.

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quick! distract her with these fellinis.

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apple cider is one of the drink components, it was a bit tarty sour sweet, liked it. jeanette had the same.

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she suggested colleague get a shot of the pussy willows, when she overheard me barking demands reminders and suggestions to capture this and that before we left, so he took this one and it appears as though to be an outside shot. neat. i find i am too sparse with my compliments so have to be better (nicer) than that other than, going like, yeah that’s great, good for you I DON’T SEE MY FACE ANYWHERE IN THOSE PUSSY WILLOWS SO WHY ARE YOU WASTING MY TIME? um i am turning into naomi campbell. SHE is scary. i love her. remind me to google image obsess search over her later on please thank you it’s important.

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it has always been my dream to have a big butcher block kitchen island counter. oh it’ll happen. just watch.

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full marks for people watching venue. these are the best types of joints for that. people who are super into their cuisine and are out to be doted on, i love the free-for-all once the wine’s flowing, you turn to your table neighbours to your right or left once both parties have eavesdropped appropriately enough and say whatever’s on your mind. no snobby attitudes clogging up the atmosphere.

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cleanse coach giving me some super probiotics but i left my bottle of digestion enhancement enzymes at home. pop these when you eat post-cleanse to keep that brand new food movement moving.

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i’m like, they taste like cotton. wow. how apt. thanks for that.

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they make you chestier in the chest is what they’re really all about.

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catch me if you can.

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that good looking guy beside me is cherie’s husband. very personable dude.

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lynn came by to give us heck about not having pork shoulder (APPLE CIDER & JACK DANIELS MARINATED PORK LOIN)(drool, jesus when they write about it like that kinda makes you feel stupid eh?) so she made us tenderloin, which i love. thanks lynn. (nervous relief). someone has beautiful penmanship, look at the font of the writing on the blackboard. swoon.

here’s the entire menu for thursday:

THURSDAY MAY 5

STEEL HEAD TROUT & CARRON FARMS BEET SALAD

Sleger’s Living Greens, Fingerling Potato Coins, Quail Egg,

Triple Crunch Mustard Dressing

APPLE CIDER & JACK DANIELS MARINATED PORK LOIN

Pork Shoulder Cassoulet,
Grilled Kielbasa Sausages with Wild Mushrooms

Ice Berg Lettuce Wedge with Warm Bacon Vinaigrette

ARTISANAL CHEESE

Celery & Radish Salad, Grilled Country Bread

CHOCOLATE & RICOTTA CAKE
Detour Coffee Toffee Sauce

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you know the food is good if they brand the towels, you wouldn’t do that if your food sucked. branding towels is a privilege.

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island foods stamps their logo on their bags, their food is good enough for that so i won’t call the food police on them. so by this theory, mc’d’s and BK, a&w etc should be barred from all that branding.

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reminds me of the britney spears circus video.

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very happy girl. this steel head trout salad was delish. little adorable quail eggs, beets (which are now out of season nooo i love you beets don’t leave me!) fingerling potato “coins” (CUTE!) lightly dressed, definite mustard seed notes swimming in there. i love mustard seed i use it often. mustard seed for the win.

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i had the tiniest bit of this cheese biscuit, i avoided it so i don’t remember what the blend was but it was delicious. i just had a brooklyn flashback of getting chicken and biscuits from a drive through in bushwick (flatbush? somewhere dangerous at that time of night) with jamie then sitting with our boxes of grease in front of easy rider, in his greenpoint loft. i was like, i have arrived in life. actually i was at a very depressed juncture which i shall blog poetically about someday when i can get over it. the point is, drippy buttery greasy biscuits are quite the invention of destruction so if you must, please only have one from a place like Ruby – 730 Queen St E – 4.1.6 4.6.5.0.1.0.0. make a reservation i doubt you’ll be able to just drop in, maybe on industry night (mondays).

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more light source be resourceful. hi yeah can i have a glass of the pinot and four more candles. no, five more.

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here get me get me i am doing something cute and different now, a tucked in linen. to hide my sausagely-defined eating tour torso.

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love looking in on this. that’s why people love hell’s kitchen even though they get shitty food (for tv’s sake) or have to wait 2 hours and then get interviewed about how they had to wait 2 hours even though they KNEW they’d have to wait two f–ing hours (i love it) and you’re like if you really wanted to eat you’d go to spago or some shit but no, you want to be on tv and want to watch the crazy frenzy going on in the kitchen expecting to be pissed off and then it’s your moment to be pissed off shine on camera, people FIGHT to get in that restaurant (wasn’t there a ramsay’s kitchen nightmares where blogger reviewers came in and one girl tweeted during service about how it was crap? i need to find that episode). servers get addicted to this stress, the adrenaline i had after closing bar forces you to chug booze like a chris farley john belushi love child and stay up til 5am. i know i am addicted to this blog and the crazy variety of things i do daily yet crave a break and then when the break comes i get emo and think everybody forgot about me when’s the next thing OMFG WHEN!?

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like i said the menu changes daily. i like that. there will definitely be something on it for everybody, they serve your party in bigger portions and you can plate it yourself if you’re finicky. smart.

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just anotha’ day.

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what’s he doin’ to us, are we getting crushes here or what? totally. ha ha.

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i liked and found humour that we get to bask in the luminescence of the subway sign ‘cross the way. any closer to the front and you can watch someone having the thursday sub special while you cut into your oh so tender APPLE CIDER & JACK DANIELS MARINATED PORK LOIN. heehee.

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not food wasters, good good. they divide it all for you without your needing to ask so if you played favourites with some dishes, you go home with them. ok i will arm wrestle you for the beet salad, which there is no point in bothering because i am so going to win. YEAH! i am going back to the central to arm wrestle that little erin chick. a come-uppance indeed.

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do you know how powerfully intoxicating the scent of grilled bread is? why would they do that to me? i had a teeny nibble of the artisanal cheese but mostly focused on the Celery & Radish Salad. by this point we were stuffed.

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getting a little face time with lora who will be at Cheese Boutique tomorrow SUNDAY tomorrow! yes tomorrow, which is sunday, which is also mother’s day oh crap i have to go to the bay and get my mom a gift certificate (what’s with moms and the bay?)(gahahah the teacher just said what about feairweather? ahahahahah).

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this is what she’s making. i wish she were there today i want that now, you have no idea how much i need it haha or if you saw me last night at adventurehouse then you probably do. haha hi brock and kevin and jay and the rest thanks for coming had a blast dancing with you. melodie get me those pics asap! we used my old camera it was so weird using it i can’t believe i used that piece of crap for so long and it kept this blog going, you guys have very low standards for your quality of entertainment. just saying. this blog needs an overhaul redesign stat.

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oh man chocolate ricotta cake why do you do this to me? you know i have no willpower.

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just kidding i was very good actually, i had just under a third and gave the rest to jeanette who later texted me that she had the rest in the most food p0rnographic text ever i hope i still have it ahahahaa.

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i’m like a chihuaua constantly thinking neurotically that they have to go, they don’t, they’re just hyper and agitated.

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talking some kind of shit or other, who knows who cares it travels up from a bottomless well so you don’t need to capture it all. or remember it, or listen.

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a good cleanse coach gives rewards.

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one of her sayings is eat what you want when you want with who you want without shame. ok jeanette can you shut up for one sec and put that spoon in my mouth? namaste.

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girls got great feet. i loved these wedges.

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if it was my foot i’d have done the same. they were clean and brand new looking. sorry bad table etiquette i was drunk.

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that is the biggest apple that i have ever seen. um is it real? is it even an apple? it’s so tim burton. sigh i missed him at the lightbox. i have a disney make a wish foundation dream to be jack skellington in a christmas pageant. i know every song by heart. ok this is a self indulgent irrelevant tale for another day.

i am going to get the teacher to film me singing this song. “the fame and praise comes year after year, does nothing for, these empty tears.” gah love this movie. before you! i have it on vhs! this movie is my cousin and i’s version of jesus christ superstar that my mom and my uncle sang to each other.

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you will love the decor. old mailboxes? come on!

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ok lets f– with these jeanette.

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found cheese boutique’s 2011 festival of chefs cheese accordion pamphlet (colleague designed it) each slice of which has the featured chef of the week and all their restaurant information, handy thing to hang on to.

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people need to see this thing.

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i look like something out of harry potter, make sure you visit the platinum banshee off market before heading back to hogwarts, she has a message for youuuuu.

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neato.

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i told jeanette she changed my life, hugged and thanked her and she was touched. a lot of my friends and family have told me i am their health inspiration. good. great!

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remind me to dress like a superhero more often.

thanks everyone at RUBY for the great time. yours is a prime example of an owning thy shit establishment, i shall sing your praises next time someone asks for a recco in the east end.

xoxo ruby tuesday raymi.

ps. everyone don’t forget to have one of lora’s mini macaroni hamburgers tomorrow at cheese boutique it’s on me!