That’s OK Raymz. I’ve got no problem being mentioned in any article with you. I’m kinda flattered and I’m a big fan, but you already know that. I’m a little disappointed, but not surprised at the tone of the article though. To me it’s just another illustration how out of step mainstream print is. The hoity toity tone they take: how they imply that their writing is more important than your writing, and their need to marginalize you and your followers is so hackneyed. It’s also interesting that they have to give you context by dropping mine and Matt G’s names! I’m a Globe reader, 42 years old, and been around. I love all kinds of grown-up things, and I’m pretty well read and informed – but even I felt like I was dealing with close minded parents or teachers while reading this article. The beauty of Raymi The Minx is how immersed, how involved I can get in the writing – whether you’re talking about bacon martini’s, japanese jewellery, or rabid Twilight fans. The Globe missed that, and they missed it cause they’re not in on it. The only way in, is to discover it. To your thousands of followers, Raymi The Minx has something that the Globe and other mainstream print media are losing by the hour and desperately trying cling to, especially with articles like today’s: Connection With Their Readers. Not tokenism, or trendwatching, but true emotional and intellectual relevance. That’s why you are the success story that you are, Raymi. Yee Haw!!!! Keep it Comin…..
I heard from Luc about you and Fil breaking up. And I just read some stuff on yer blog. This is the first I hear about the article and, although I haven’t read it, it sounds like a piece of shit. I’ve always known you were something special since that first night we really hung out. This city is full of jealous assholes and I’m so sick of who it promotes/disses. You do have a gift; he’s f-n wrong and has no business pronouncing on that.
I’d like to visit you. I’ve got a car.
Love,
Melodie
Dear Editor…
I have taken huge offense to some of the content of the article: “Love in the time of bloggeria”, specifically the quote from Hal Niedzviecki -“She’s very much the epitome of the committed, addicted blogger – no real gift to speak of, besides this intense need for attention. And she thrives on it.”
Lauren White (aka “Raymi The Minx”) is a fabulously talented writer, and her style is hers, and hers alone. Not to mention the accolades her writing has received, she is one of the most celebrated bloggers in Canada for a reason, not only because her blog receives more hits then many others, but because people actually care about her. Her writing makes people want to know her, she has become many readers online friend, crush, fantasy. She opens up her heart and mind and exposes it like no other writer i have ever encountered.
It’s unfortunate that Hal appears to be jealous of her talent and her readership, and it saddens me immensely to see that quote in print. It is very spiteful and rude.
i’ll sound my mouth off regarding the globe “piece” later, or tomorrow. everyone knows how media works, now while i wasn’t to anticipate this particular slant, i was nervous and ready for something. dunno. it’s good and it’s bad. i’m certainly not the only one benefiting from all this attention so it would be nice if that person who keeps harassing me, who has overstepped boundaries MANY a time with me over the years and i have patiently tolerated it, it would be wonderful if they ceased ever contacting me, talking about me, or considering i even exist anymore lest i call their parole officer tomorrow. also, why you feel the need to defend someone who hasn’t wanted a thing to do with you for a long time now, is beyond me.
that aside, this is the life that i have chosen for myself. you may have chosen an easier, simpler one, a quiet one, a desk job one, i don’t know because i don’t know you and i don’t ever presume to. i have chosen to focus my life on living and being and sharing. and so fucking what. i gambled. i keep at it, and i keep going until i can go no longer. i don’t have a boss telling me what to do everyday or how to do it. am i proud of myself? yes. do i hate myself? daily. am i sick of myself? yes. am i bored by this? yes.
Hey Raymi,
I have been quietly following your blog for the past two years, whether I liked it or not. I came upon you accidentally through numerous blog links, and I instantly fell in love with your photographs, your fashion sense and your lifestyle. Even when I decided some of your comments were too harsh or crass, and I tried to boycott reading your blog, I was pulled back in without choice. I guess in retrospect, your persona of bluntness mixed with sweet is exactly what I really like about you.
You don’t sugar coat, you don’t pretend, and your exactly who you are, even when it’s a total contradiction. I think thats pretty damn awesome. Sometimes, I even find myself saying “What would Raymi do?” or “That is totally Raymi”. I have been thinking of sending you a note for some time, and now is as good a time as any. I look forward to what your new life will bring to your blog, and I know you will be fine. I applaud you for making a decision that many can’t, and never do. Thanks for giving me something awesome to read while I am online, thanks for the fashion inspiration, thanks for the laughs. Good luck in everything you do, and never stop writing!
PS: Although Phil may not be entirely missed, I will be missing Cid.
-L
people tell me all the time that this is really easy what i do. oh it is? makes me laugh. when i talk about dieting someone with the poorest physique having the audacity to tell me my plan will not work. it’s like that. i do this because i love it and it’s the longest relationship that i have ever had and i can depend on it. do i expect everyone to be cool about it? never ever. i haven’t had the courtesy to. you lose friends. your friends lose friends even. true colours become revealed.
here’s an email i just sent (edited out the personal bits)
hey always nice to hear from you i think of you fondly in a fond i dunno, way.
sorry about yer grandma, mine took a spill once down some nasty steps, concrete. bah.
im on the fence as per how i feel about the globe piece i sort of knew he was going this way but then it was said to me that they were going to make me out to be the paris hilton of canada, not only perez, what?
true colours come out when things end, when breakups happen. it’s amazing i feel woken up to so many brand new things. (about people)
suburban fall is how she goes. from one ‘saugan to another, represent.
Just read abt @raymitheminx in the Globe. A portrait of Toronto’s most famous diarist. Shes more than just Alice. She’s the looking glass 2.about 14 hours ago from TweetDeck
@abc4
@raymitheminx critics are dicks by occupation. but denouncing art is extra dicky.
Well, first, I think there is a little jealousy on display here. The writer of the article works for a medium that is losing readers; Raymi and Phil are both working in mediums that continue to attract readers. So there is that.
The snide use of a quote, by another writer, to suggest Raymi is a vapid one-dimensional attention seeker, without a “gift” overlooks this:
Raymi has succeeded in developing a readership and maintaining a readership were literally hundreds of thousands have failed. That alone speaks to a number of gifts. Is she self-serving? Sure. So am I, and so are you. That’s human nature. Human nature is something Raymi has a keen eye for, another reason she is well read.
Finally, I would hazard this: Raymi and Phil are both representative of a twenty-something tribe, and that tribe happens to enjoy a certain angsty something or other. I’m certain the demographic that follows their blogging follows them for that reason; they describe aspects of that angsty twenties passage really well.
If anyone would like to use this comment as an example of how not to properly use semi colons and colons, feel free.
i shall rebut this moreso later, kinda gotta split. a few parts i take issue with but more or less, i’m fine with it. to say i have no real gift to speak of is a bit rich. i’m interesting, that’s a gift. it’s a talent, in fact. you’re not. so, respectfully, fuck you. writing about individuals who do rather than not, does not make you interesting. taking advantage of popular culture, is not interesting. nor is it a gift. everything is old news before you even hit publish. maintaining eyeballs for ten years IS a gift. going out everyday looking at the world and asking yourself how to make the mundane, endearing, you try it. and good luck too. put yourself in center focus while you’re at it and take lots of shit for every minor detail down to your eyebrows.
another thing, i do not find honesty to be distasteful. there is no back and fight war going on, there is simply here and there is there and over here i’m finally purging, as respectfully as i know how, presently. also, over there the “veiled references” had been going on long before this week. i’m giving bare bones information, i feel. minimal.
here’s a quote not used in the article:
I’m not part of blogging circles. I can only tell you that Raymi is deftly holding back the feeding frenzy while she sorts out her life. She just took a bold leap and removed her safety net, meanwhile people just want the dirt. There’s a huge opportunity here for her to exploit the relationship’s demise and get a lot of attention from it, but out of respect for the other person, she’s not doing that and I think that’s confusing her readers more than anything.
i also never complained about the suburbs. make fun of, sure. certainly. absolutely. i grew up in suburbia so i know it well, hate it well, but still love it. i’m fine with where i am right now in fact, britt asked me yesterday when the plan was to make my way back to the city and i said i’m actually considering going further away. i was done with the city before i even left it.
one thing typically left out when it comes to the matter of breakups is feelings. manners. respect. we didn’t part on awful terms so i’m not going to paint the internet scarlet with IT’S FUCKING OVER YEAAAAAAAAAH blog posts straight off the bat. i’m going to, bit by bit, emotionally make out of context vague references, as i always have.
and now if you’ll excuse me i have to go figure out another way to get attention.
ps. i dug on the coors light mention. you know, being interviewed on a good day is nerve-wracking. try it on a bad day, following a couple bad months. see what drink you go for.
Hey Raymi
I’ve followed you a lot over the last seven or eight years. All I wanted to say was that I hope you’re ok and that I’ll be thinking about you. Seems strange I can get bummed out over the break-up of two people I’ll never meet, but there you go.
party store post halloween, weird vibe. ‘specially from the above it teens working there. i think we did a good job in irritating each and every one of them.
girls nite out attire. i’d be game for that. elton john on the juke til dawn.
i could easily handle a room with the walls adorned entirely in curled ribbons.
yuh-awn. just look in the mirror, guy.
into that wig. daisy of love? i’d be good for one ridiculous marie antoinette wig for sure.
almost went there.
too masqueradey. too phantom. too geeky, essentially. grabbed a couple feather face pieces, one black, one white.
no discounts. don’t worry it won’t “be right” for “the costume” so we’ll have to return it sunday.
oh, hi.
just a dollar. it’s like they knew i was coming.
man, if it wasn’t for the sun, somedays i’d just. you know? you do.
it’s so easy to fall in love.
guys i have a vision ok so it’s like this: i emerge from this stump. yeah and then?
then, when i figure out how to turn around in it…
then you make it rain leaves all around me.
this is what i’ve been dreaming about. crazy girl on film, long dress, lying down (so lazy) slow motion emo running through the tall dead grass. oh and balloons. oh yes. there will be balloons. (hence party store)
OMG THIS IS SO GOING ON FLICKR.
UFO landing. sorry, signs.
fuh-licker.
recommend a new fly purse please. cheapo, el.
stupid astors. bladder is the last word you want to see when yer poundin’ brews.
a beautiful old man moment is captured. he was intensely considering something. saw it from miles.
the rest of the day’s goings-on (way too many s apostrophy thingers in a row there) can be found here.
check the globe&mail tomorrow. toronto section. goes up online too.
happy birthday mom love you! XOXOXOXO
Hey Raymi/Lauren.
I’ve been reading your blog for some time now, and I have to say that I’ve felt inspired to be
a better boyfriend just because of what you’ve been saying.
My girl and I have been together for only a year, and we are now living together, and I think
I’ve forgotten how to keep things fresh. People can often get stuck in routine, and I don’t ever
think that a relationship should be allowed to become a habit. You have to keep working at it.
Keep doing little things to remind the person that you love them, etc.
I wanted to thank you for indirectly reminding me of what I have to do to keep the one I love.
I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you, and I know it’s little consolation, but you maybe gave my
relationship some fuel to last.
here is what i have learned this week. shockingly, so many women, married, with kids, without, men too, boyfriends, girlfriends, so many of you feel trapped in relationships you’re unhappy in. unions you’ve stuck it out years for. YEARS. aside from the piles of comments (which are splendid thank you very much) coming in i have been receiving a gauntlet of emails, truly personal painful emails. long ones that take me ages to get through, like entire afternoons. not all sad, though the ones that stand out most are the sad of course.
but i don’t know what the answer is. for you. i just know that being unhappy for the sake of someone else is probably the stupidest life choice ever. i am not saying that is what i did but from my pedestal it’s easy to be like oh no, that’s what other people do. fall into.
look, i am likely the most annoying insufferable partner you can take on. i will smother the shit out of you. that’s my game plan, basically, and i have to KNOW EVERYTHING. i am super jealous and possessive. lazy. irritating. opinionated. but that’s not the point. the point is i am also fucking wonderful. i am a treasure. endearing. i will give you all of my attention and i will worship you. i make US my world. i do not self-serve. i will distract you from your pain and i will buy you stupid presents you do not need.
however, when someone stops being blown away by you, that’s when you have to leave. when the reasons why someone fell in love with you get choked (unintentionally) into submission that’s when you must leave.
i was told once that there were things about me that could not be replaced, or found in someone else. this is true but is it worth sticking it out with me because i say things in weird cute voices sometimes? (YES)(hahhaa)
my fear is that i morph men into fucked up pieces of shit like me, just the bad parts. apparently men aren’t jealous prior to me. pfft. well. i dunno.
when you’re with someone who is equally attractive as you, maybe even more so depending which way you look at them, or seeing them in action, how women react to them – it fucks you up. when you have some insecurities to begin with, shit gets crazy. one, you are constantly at battle with hovering women. then you are at battle with friends discussing said hovering women. then you are at battle internally over it and then you are also fielding shit from strangers on the internet. everyone tells you how you should be handling jealousy, ugh. look that’s all fine and good if the person i shouldn’t be jealous of was actually giving me some validation. if they came alive for me and not just for everybody else in our world.
in summation. i do not know. we are all feeling the same things on this planet. isolation, controlled, stuck, unhappy. it’s boggling that this is the way of the world and humans. that it degenerates into this. birth, courtship, marriage, unhappiness, death.
somewhat of a sidenote, periodically i get emailed from a recently broken up soul telling me that they were not allowed to read my blog because their past other half would not allow it and then it became “a thing” and basically i broke them up. that’s pretty ridiculous.
the globe and mail is coming by tomorrow to, not exploit but, “the idea is a new yorker mag talk of town piece” profile me. i better watch my mouth.
first question asked, “now, is this a publicity stunt?”
it’s been thrown around more than once. that astounds me. who would benefit from that, namely, what could be benefited from a fake breakup?
more than five years later. i took this photo of myself on my 21st birthday that liz expertly, uniquely recreated in painting-form. anyway aside from the no bangs (that i frequently pine for) and the blond, pretty much the same yeah?
i don’t know why it’s funny to me it just is. when i go to the bathroom i stand beside it and try to pose like that and it’s impossible, my brain tries to tell my head where to look and then i feel really smart. here’s the photo, was used for the cover of dear raymi, that jamie designed.
sigh. youth.
here’s something from someone smarter and wiser than i.
First I want to state I am an old guy. Am not on your site to look at your tittys, though they are nice, there are a lot of that all over the internets. You are an entertaining writer. I enjoy your humor.
I read your post last night. You laid it out there for all to see. There was nothing that surprised me to much. Y’all were on the run a lot. Can’t keep that life style up for a long period of time. I have been down that road. It catches up with you.
I wish Phil well…………
I hope you realize you will lose some of your current friends. These are friends for your current life style. Drinking and partying. They are not bad friends it is just something that will happen. You are wanting to change your life and they are enjoying what they are doing. Don’t be to hard on them. Choices. They will talk to you but you will find there will be less and less to talk about. Your mutual interest have changed.
Please try to keep up your current humor, you are a fun read. You are also quite attractive. Even old guys happen to notice that stuff……
Rami(Lauren) I wish you well for whatever the future brings you. I do believe you have the right attitude and just keep on keeping on and moving forward for yourself.
Sounds as though you have a great family to support you…..You are blessed.
Have a great day………………………
how much did sesame street pay google for this one?
