scowling cos no matter how many times i clean the mirror it is always dirty.

here is something i wrote when i was in highschool about a guy who was in a few of my classes throughout my highschool tenure, i wrote this a month before graduating. it’s more or less all true. he is on my facebook.

2001 lauren white.

“it’s because we have nothing in common. i’m sorry, you’re just not interesting enough for me. that’s the way it is.”

it’s wednesday, 10:49am – he’s followed her from the upstairs hallway, passed rooms 201, 203, 207… 214 – down the stairs, through the business department to the history dept. and now he’s circling her like a moth in the tech. hallway.

he is always there.

he is socially retarded, brilliant at saying random, inappropriate and ill-thought statements – inept at reading body language. he mutters to himself whilst walking alone through the crowd. he is always alone. he has quite possibly the ugliest face you would ever lay eyes upon. he is emotionally scarred due to this. kids are so honestly harsh.

she lets him walk uptown with her friends because they get a kick out of his weirdness.

he is not used to being around people so he acts in a manner all his own. he is scratching his head and smiling to himself over dirty thoughts.

he told her a goat was slaughtered in his honour of his 17th birthday and he’s noticed he talks to himself a lot less now.

he has convinced himself he is gay – she thinks he is vulnerable and desperate of anyone’s affection or touch.

they stand in a circle eating slices with their backs out and he is not confident enough to penetrate so he wanders off, not too far, talking to himself and pacing in circles.

he’ll probably be a virgin for the rest of his life.

he is 5’3, maybe. hairy all over, and tucks his sweaters into his tight jeans.

he worries about school and homework and getting good grades. that is all he has. he is very bright, but his intelligence has deteriorated because he lacks common sense.

he is a textbook from 1987.

he thinks short-term.

he is so painfully ugly.

he is flawed all over and she has lost patience with being nice to him. she has had enough of his constant mumbling and following her from class to class and attempts of prying into her life.

he is suicide waiting to happen. yes. he’s one of those – though, he hasn’t the will to go through with it.

they both sit at the extreme opposite end of the spectrum.

—–

well, he’s still alive, so that’s good.

happy birthday.

sashimi times two.

kristin secretly threw this into my bag at magic pony.

ipod holder i bought for fil at canzine fest 2005 that i now use for my camera you care.

e sushi (bathurst/bloor) always get it right i don’t know why i fuck up sometimes and test out the other places on bloor, jtime sushi pics to come further down this post, MISTAKEVILLE!

rice thief.

hai thur.

jtime sushi last nite, we ordered baseball sashimi (medium sized order) japan roll, dynamic roll and cn tower roll and two large sakes, you’d think they could spare a couple extra salads and soups yeah?

NOPE! for share for share!

share is a bad omen.

i am bummed cos i know we made a jtime jmistake.

they at least get the rolls right, the wasabi mayo is amazing and perfect for covering up flaws.

i’m glad we didn’t get the larger order, ungh i hate roe, do NOT ask me what that white shit is.

i KNOW!

lesson learned.

dynamic (dynamite) roll is always good.

fil’s cn tower roll.

ew!

holy shit my nose was huge last nite.

the lady who likes to stand around not bussing dirty plates was watching me do this and was not feeling it either, so what, don’t give me tentacles. i did not eat it.

i tried to make the lefties more appealing for christie, she was done. i put the purple guy on the far right in my mouth and then spat it out. i fucked up the meal by using the higher sodium soya sauce and the wasabi was retardedly hot too.

clockwise from the green, green tea, red bean, sesame. the dude was all braggy about us getting ice cream too and said ON THE HOUSE yeah excuse me dude this place is NOT called BJtime.

then we bought a box of wine to further celebrate fil’s impeccable health.

i made a new flickr food set.

fil and i have been spending 54/7 (feels like) together now that he is on sabbatical, and we are both still alive, it’s like we are living on this little planet far-removed from the rest of the universe where people don’t have jobs or scowls on their faces. he bought a new computer to aid in the not killing of each other, we sit at our little desks listening to our headphones and the room is filled with silence for hours, it’s funny. and then i get up to pee say something funny then go back into blogworld and then we go out for a walk and a snack.

there was something else i wanted to say that was funny but i forget, maybe it’ll come back to me.

GO TEAM HOUSEWIFE GO GO GO!

the other day i was in the middle of a stressful phonecall and during that i was attempting to spring clean my closet, drawers, all of my clothes, and i was angrily shoving stuff into plastic bags to throw out and to donate when i got off the phone the bed was a complete disaster, like full-on mountain of clothes it was funny but at the time i was too pissed off to take a picture and i think i threw out some things i didn’t mean to just went straight to the garbage chute and goodbye.

+++

lets talk about this post. i am going to go to toys ‘r us to rip on more toys CAN’T WAIT.

this is our favourite comic (panels?) out of lenore, fil scanned it for me last nite.

+++

ha! i made you a present

hi.

you made me totally laugh today with your post. omg, I had that book, but I never thought to underline and make notes. funny. so, here is a picture of you. well kinda, if you walked around with a red hood on and a gay smile on your face.

xoxkyra

and yet, another reason i was a boyfriendless tween.

WHAT CLAUDIA WORE!!!

And her clothes! Nobody dresses like Claudia. She is totally cool. She wears funky stuff like pink sparkly high-topped sneakers, or short flared skirts over skintight leggings, or wild jewelry she’s made herself. She’s good at pottery and is always creating earrings (she has one hole in one ear and two in the other) or beaded necklaces or bracelets.

found on the ever-reliable tuppenhut.

+++

my old nickname was ren.

oh how nice we have a little atheist on our hands.

for some reason i am more embarrassed to share this with you than i am about telling stories about shitting my pants. so what made think of blogging this was last nite we saw the trailer for the mist that comes out nov. 21 – it’s one of my favourite scary stories come to film, by stephen king. anyway i feel like i have some sort of ownership of it because i read it many times, and i have a copy of it along with a bunch of other short stories in paperback form in one book from when i was 13 maybe 14, before i had my first real boyfriend, which will be super obvious once you see how much of a raving nerd loser i was.

so i decided to write my own “reviews” for each story at the top of the page for every one, oh god, well, enjoy.

how thoughtful of me, and i see i am still doing the circle above the i’s, CRINGE! this tells me i might even be 12.

oh jesus i want to jump out of a fucking window right now, it gets worse.

NOOOOOO DON’T LOOK AT ME! so close to not including this guy.

you would explode if you saw what my face looks like right now from looking at this i feel like i am watching 2girls1cup.

and here we have the mist and i obviously enjoyed it, it took me five minutes to make sense of my wording here. ten points for spelling kicks: kix.

i sorta didn’t dig this story, i found it long-winded and boring who cares i have to sell each one and to whom? dunno!

how funny/sad that i checked off the introduction like i am proud of having read it AND put an asterisk.

you’ll notice an affinity for the crazy, sorry red flag much?

who says mythical oh right girls w/o boyfriends do!

haha what an arrogant piece of shit loner.

yeah thanks.

what a prude i didn’t want to say there was fucking in it and i apparently know a lot about adolescence, being 12 years old of course i am an expert on it.

evidence of giftedness right here.

oh, you don’t say?

good to know, thanks for the tip!

HAHAHAHAHHAHA look at how much of a liar i am!

WE KNOW WE GET IT, CRAZY = INTERESTING!

thank you doctor book sleuth.

woah i mean business with that red asterisk.

i’m so helpful, in case you did not get the retardedly clear ending, I EXPLAIN IT FOR YOU!

i don’t want anyone to be left behind so no biggie that i ran out of page space to help you along so i continue on the next page, what a pal.

ok now i’m just whole-hog fibbing.

FINALLY! SOME HONESTY!

the end.

let the jokes begin.

all hail technoviking

stay tuned for something wickedly embarrassing, you guys owe me HUGE for this one. fil thinks it’s kinda endearing then he spends 5 minutes laughing hysterically at me. brb.

also i would like to remind you that i have raymitheminx.com back now and you can change your links if you want, but, if you were ever wanting to link to a specific post you would need to do so from raymitheminx.blogspot.com, that is all, i am an internet detective.

oh wait nevermind, totally disregard that, i think that was when i do my archives thingy i can’t get at them or maybe i hallucinated it. carry on.