i’m fucking hungry and starving and learning that adderall with no food, equals exactly what i wanted it to. surpassing hunger because this place is too messy to cook and there are no food implements to use. haha.
i like going back and forth from my laptop to the mac machine thing in my pajama bottoms and flip flops and no shirt and sweaty armpits. did you know i stubbed my left toe, the one beside the big one and i think the nail might fall off. i don’t care about that, it’s not so important. it just hurts when i walk and i hobble a bit.
we drank neo citran and had a coma from 930am-320pm and everything else was put on hold.
this may as well be my fucking book
i might be moving to a studio loft big open-concept place like you see in the movies.
i will be twenty years old in seventy-one days. i think i am ok with the idea of that now. i was masturbating and i said, “i am almost twenty years old. that pussy is almost twenty years old. i should tell people i am twenty years old. i like that number.”
and then there is my book which i have not added to in four weeks and i realise that when i publish it i can put on the back that i was 18-19 years old when i wrote it and then i will feel superior to all other beings.
thank you jdh for the pill. i am flying now. i’m not even hungry anymore. i know i make people cringe when i say dark things. my psychiatrist thinks i might have ADHD after i told him everything i did over the past 4 weeks and i didn’t lie about one single thing. not one. rather, i told it all and did not cover anything up. i see him again monday, 1:15pm and i will be there on time with a coffee to hold in my hand so i dont fidget with my hat or my hair or fingernails.
wuh wuh wuhhhhh…guess what happens when you type raymitheminx.com?
boink!
each day
i’mge t t ing
b ette r
and
bett er
so write raymitheminx.com on bathroom stalls and toilet paper rolls, ok?
useful links:
we were in the same movie together
my answer to ebay taking down my dirty panties auctions
people who don’t write about me are boring
how old is this kid? 10? looks young in the drum picture
so my book is about my life and all the things i don’t tell you here and something more. i’m just trying to be a pioneer and have a nice looking little thing to store away with all my adventures so i can move on to the next chapter of my life. i use to fantasize about my journals being found in parks or wherever and then being telephoned and told that i am brilliant and interesting and worth having the world know about me. i think i’m doing all the things i was meant to be doing on this earth. anything different wouldn’t seem right.
MONDO magazine wrote about me. i’m going to their release party tomorrow. somewhere near York university, the rooster something pub. now i have to go look at more photos and maybe shower or make it look like i had a shower and then go meet parkdalemiddleton for drinks and food or hash fuck i need to go to the tanning salon and go get my money and go go go go go.
Douglas Coupland, i saw you on a commercial for this canadian awards thing. i screamed and everyone went, what? we were sitting in this junky-style livingroom with a hole in the wooden floor and the room was all slanted and i said, “DOUGLAS COUPLAND!?” and no one knew except for one, who you were. but i couldn’t talk about it because no one understands me and i kept saying, ok i’ll take that tranquilizer now, no NOW, ok in a minute because sometimes when i get to talking it’s like i can’t stop and i am even annoyed at myself. but one guy was nice and said, no what you are saying is interesting, tell me more. i couldn’t tell if he just wanted to fuck me. i don’t trust many people.
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lil’ raymi’s viewing
