a tiny man would tell a little joke and get a tiny laugh from all the folks

after top model we decided to go out on the town, which translates to going to the fox n fiddle to play megatouch and drink cheap martinis and listen to open mic.

hurry up fil!

now i’m not a mixologist or anything but i’m PRETTY SURE a keylime martini doesn’t look like this, or taste like pineapple. drank it anyway. the ‘tender said they were 3.50 (i knew they were 4.50, didn’t correct her) and bam four (mine, fil had beers) later we get the bill and i say yeah you said they were 3.50 and she snaps yeah well i’ve been doing this 2 years so i know they’re 4.50 and then she shows me the little sign i say yeah i get it, but you said 3.50, she goes i’m pretty sure i didn’t (so did, fil heard it too) anyway, don’t turn cunty on me cos i’m correcting you, if you’da shut yer trap that 4 extra bones would have been added to your tip, idiot. yeah i was pretty blasted. fil stopped me just as i was about to give her shit about her “keylime” martini that she had the gall to say she made really well. OH YEAH and she flirted with fil right in front of me too i just remembered! she goes HEY don’t YOU work in a bar or something? lame. baby, you’re a 6 at most, he’s like, a 10, forget it.