i’m going to write a poem
i think that will show ‘em
because i got the style
that is way longer than a mile
them bitches i defile
while i eat a crocodile
and i’m like see you later
and i eat an alligator
and i’m like yo i just crush a lot
i ain’t no hater
i’m a porno rollerskater
a mix-master debater
all the egos i deflater
in that golden elevator

this poem sucks

people are talking loud outside in the alley and i want to go out and say excuuuuuse me if you are going to talk loud can you at least be discussing juicy gossip about your boyfriends and other stuff that is actually interesting for me to be eavesdropping in on? thanks. oh and can you make it so you don’t sound like you are 13 years old?

one time over summer some kids were playing in the alley and i went HEY EXCUSE ME I AM TRYING TO WORK IN HERE! and their father apologized and they went away because they thought i was a stressed-out student even though it was summer (no school) and i was playing alchemy or something.

mean mean mean i like mean i like mean.

things that turn me into a monster

people who walk slow in large groups and then you have to follow them for a little bit and then you finally have a chance to get by them and walk to where you are going and then you are finished and walking back and they are still walking slow and they give you this look like oh there is that girl who walked faster than we did

and they kind of scowl like they are in charge of the sidewalk

it makes me fucking insane

who are you to think you have the right to be mad at me

i’m the one who is mad at YOU and now you’ve flipped it so that i am the bad guy

so then i have no choice but to walk amazingly fast and cut through all of them like the biggest bitch there ever was and i am in a hurry to go save someone’s life but really i am in a hurry to watch television and eat popcorn.

speaking of popcorn

listening to the bag rustle and the popcorn shake around makes me so mad

i can’t describe it

ask fil he knows all about it and he use to appease my mental retardation by letting me pour it in a bowl but now he refuses and so i have to sit through bag rustling and my eyes get squinty and i shush him every ten seconds and lean way forward towards the tv so that i am one with it.

faygo stripper. says:

hows your day?

raymi says:

snowy

raymi says:

how is yours?

faygo stripper. says:

same. i had to shovel. but then the end broke off.

raymi says:

loser

faygo stripper. says:

straight goods. i like your art blog

raymi says:

thanks it’s retarded

faygo stripper. says:

ya but in a good way.

faygo stripper. says:

ok i have to go buy a new shovel. ill talk to you soon.

the lady who made our bagels is retarded.

slow.

and the other lady serving coffee is fat and bitchy and s-talks every person who walks by the front of tim horton’s.
this one old lady was walking slowly by and she put her cigarette out on the sidewalk and the coffeebitch goes UNNNNNGH THERE IS AN ASHTRAY LIKE, LIKE, RIGHT THERE, YOU KNOW and she looked around to make sure her co-workers were paying attention to her disgust and it made me want to go outside and put out 5 cigarettes on the sidewalk because i didn’t like her tone.

today fil will get to see half baked for the very first time. i tried to explain it to him how funny it is and i tried to say some of the funny lines and i don’t think i sold it very well.

ok there’s this part where the guys spend a bunch of money that they are not suppose to because they are saving to get that one guy out of jail and then dave chappelle yells at them all for spending the money and then he takes a toke and his voice changes all nice and he says “i’m sorry for yelling.” and then he takes another toke and says something else that i forget, and it’s really funny. i mean it. it’s SO funny. it’s the way he says it that’s funny.

then i tried to immitate it and i thought i did a pretty good job but because it wasn’t in context, fil didn’t laugh, or smile, nothing.