look it’s the tofu olympics!

tomorrow it is jamie‘s birthday.

raymi says:

i like that you are best friends with bono now cos this means that i can be his friend too

Jamie says:

yes

Jamie says:

i told bono about you

Jamie says:

he wants to meet you

raymi says:

good

raymi says:

can you give him my phone number

Jamie says:

he said he might write a song for you to post on your blog

raymi says:

tell him to make it a la joshua tree and not like his mid life crisis techno pop album

Jamie says:

okay

from now on i only take advice from this guy.

i’m watching life aquatic for the hundredth time and now i want to sew the letter Z into everything i own with big fat yarn thread.

just thought you’d like to know that.

oh and i’ve had this sort of pink crush on this mean lesbo girl since i was 17 that i have seen around town here and there and yesterday she actually spoke to me and i choked on my beer and spat it all over my table.

what to do in a terrorist attack. v. funny.

some fucking asshole tied up their dog outside of the coffeeshop in the rain and he is soaked and whimpering and kind of old-looking and i burst into tears seeing him and ran all the way back here. i think i might go back and say something and have a total jerry maguire flip out in the coffee shop and then people will be all, “usually she is quiet and keeps to herself but today, all of a sudden….”

i’m so fucking mad right now.

so yesterday was kind of retarded.

i collected my bike from melody’s and realised the back tire was completely flat so i took it to that place in parkdale with noel where that old guy fixes bikes and while he waits for customers he hangs out with pigeons and they sit on his hands, what’s up pigeon whisperer?

anyway he takes out my tube and just stuffs it back in again and i give him a fiver and we go to noel’s for a bit and then we go to magic pony but already my tire is flat again so i just leave my fucking bike and take a cab there and everything is all bright white and lit-up and full of arty geeks and i almost blew a lot of money of some stuff but i didn’t.

then noel and i parted ways instead of me going back to his place to make art. i was pretty pissed off about the whole bike thing still so i went to the queen’s head to drink a 50 and eat a bowl of split pea & bacon soup like a homeless person and then samir shows up and is all you are pathetic. i was pretty trashed at this point so we go around the corner to the pretentious paddock for a wrap party and drink a bunch of free booze and eat free salmon.

then we ditched to go to beaconsfield but i thought screw this i’ll just go home now and called a cab and then this slutty little cat walks by and i pick it up and it was clinging to me and i wanted to keep it but i didn’t. i’m all about being wasted and picking up strange animals like it’s not at all inappropriate.

this fucking bottle of gin just won’t leave me the hell alone.

i went over to help my mum with some photos and then i took as many quarters as i could and longboarded back here and my pants kept falling down and jingle jangling and cos the season is changing there is hella leaves and little branches all over the road and i have near heart attacks flying over them but i didn’t wipe out.

last nite we watched the hockey game and it turns out that fil screams like a girl when we score.