this picture made it into my dream last nite as i took it right before bed and was like oh man i canNOt wait to put that on the internet, wow, time to get a life maybe?
i had to sew those ribbons back on they were hot-glued on only and came off the second i took them out of the package, i also bought these socks in black (2 for 20) and a white lace pair of knee socks i am never going to dress my age, at least i don’t wear platform spice girl shoes and have platinum hair and crow’s feet. yet.
fyi you get loads more cut eye with thigh highs than knee socks, wow, what a world of difference i totally forgot about that, i used to wear them in grade 6 i’ll get you a dumb picture in a second, anyway, at the tap this circle of unhip chicks broke their necks glaring at me i was pretty close to yelling at them to stop fucking looking at me.
ps. i am purposely trying to tone down the sexy in front of my parents wearing these things cos i didn’t want to be forbidden from wearing them, but trust me, once i was out of eye-shot don’t think i didn’t jut my chest and ass out like crazy.
cobrasnake after party none of us went to, half sad about it.
broszkowski and i were dancing and i hear RAYMI RAYMI and ignore it cos fil says i am narcissistic and imagine all the time that people are looking at me or screaming my name, turns out i was right! rachel in the red hat shot the fred perry shoot with/of me. ps. nice fountain of babehair beside you.
hahahahaahhhahhaha
ps. that youtube kid wrote back to tell me he wasn’t fat, he’s buff, and that he probably knows more about nirvana than i do, then says he isn’t a fan in one comment, then in another the biggest fan. yawn.
HITMANCHON
I have much more freinds than you do and I am not a wannabee singer that sucks at singing Nirvana song, im not fat im hella buff you slut, you need to go burn in a lake of fire and never come back.
HITMANCHON
You need to get your fucken facts straight you dumb bitch! I am a huge Nirvana fan and probably know more shit about Nirvana than you do, and by the way im not fat im buff.
someone needs to tell him that these days the word buff and curvy, equals fat.
omg survivor is on right now and they just brought out everyone’s relatives oh man thanks a lot what’s next to watch a dog giving birth to little puppies STOP IT! i can’t type right now cos i can barely see the keys through my fucking tears blearaghhg.
may my first pair of skinny jeans rest in p-ieces ahha oh punny i have to tell that one to my dad.
we’re going to see the teenagers tonite at lee’s, if you feel like buying me a drink come on down.
bunny is coming for a sleepover next week for two nites, it’s gonna be a reunion, except now we are both old ladies. well i don’t know why i said “except” maybe i mean like sigh, times are different now?
peep my tan! i will try and recreate this entire ensemble for her, tan included. too bad i can’t cos i’m wearing all of her clothes, what i can offer is a few days of unwashed hair so that it turns sweaty greasy curly oh and can you lose like ten pounds in a week?
i read her a story.
Bunny: I like how you were like YOUR BOOBS ARE SURPRISINGLY SMALL
me: HAHAHAHA no they arent theyre biggish
Bunny: they’re 34 bs I think I always was pushing them up in pictures
me: well bigger than mine
Bunny: like CHECK OUT MY SOLID C RACK yes so is my giant ass. CANT TRUSS A BIG BUTT AND A SMILE
me: omg yer ass is not big
Bunny: anyway…ok, I’m off to lay out so I can get a nice, canadian vacation tan.
me: i wonder if my dad heard us hugging with our pants off
Bunny: hahah I know he walked in when I was taking a picture of you with your legs upon your head. i was like “oh good evening, sir. I am your daughters smarmy film maker friend.”
me: yeah he was blown away by your enthusiasm at meeting me you gave him a new perspective of dimension or insight into my blog “fame”
Bunny: I was pretty jazzed. it was one of those things where I felt like we’d click, and I admired you and your vivacious blogs and plus I wanted to make out with you.
me: can i say on my blog we hugged with our pants off
Bunny: sure you can say whatever you want.
me: ok you put your tits on my vagina and it blew my mind i was content on just falling asleep and then you attacked me and i was ready to go
Bunny: yeah, I was pretty hots for you but that dweeby guy kept getting all up ons and wouldn’t leave.
me: do you have that dress still you kicked him out
Bunny: I don’t, or I’d give it to you.
me: that guy eventually went looneytunes on me
Bunny: I know. Pardon me, I must fuck your friend.
me: i transcribed a note he left on my front porch onto my blog ill find it
Bunny: haha
me: lots of grammatical errors
i wanted fil to capture my big pass the pigs moment but i crapped out on my first roll, sigh:
trimmed my ends, what i do is separate my hair down the back of my head and put each part over my shoulder to the front and usually i cut one side shorter than the other, as i did yesterday, feh. when your hair is that long who even notices that?
fil didn’t want to take my picture because his toe is broken (crabby) then the most obnoxious (bipolar) chick ever came in with her friends and was trying to impress the room with her cool (bipolar) anecdotes. at one point i said to fil we were listening to stuffwhitepeoplelike right now because she was talking about OH IN CHINA bla bla blah. also a gaggle of girl’s nite out (in) chicks came to pick up their take out and left the door open TWICE i almost ran out after them and screamed at them, didn’t. i even got the adrenaline surge like ok i’m going to DO something now.
guess who lost more weight? fuck now i get how much you hate girls who blog about that shit, whatever, i’m working really hard you know, so eat it.
i should warn you that this post consists of like 20 more pictures of me.
we drink nag drinks now which = white wine + ice cubes haha.
my thumb is the same size as fil’s pinky.
morning.
feed me time or i turn into a purring nest in your lap.
i thought i’d introduce you to my new friend HITMANCHON from youtube, have you noticed the fine calibre that fuckin’ place produces?
hitmanchon has this to say about my lake of fire sing a long in the car (which to be fair i am butchering purposely after singing the majority of the songs off unplugged during a long car ride):
HITMANCHON You fucken suck blg black dicks! How could you possibly sing that awful you really ruined that song hope you never sing another one of Nirvanas’ song.
to which i replied: oh go lose some weight and make some friends.
only because i learned from his profile he has a myspace account too, “hitman509″ oh great one of these types and it’s private, of course it is, internet lunatic shit slinger’s profiles are always private.
i had to tell him on one of his videos just to be sure he knew i reacted to his comment: raymilauren you are a fat 16 year old pile of shit you don’t know your ass from your elbow you were two fucking years old when kurt blasted himself NEXT.
then i noticed he left me this comment on my karaoke jam to where did you sleep last nite (oh please) don’t you know the rule of talking to me if you’re a kid? it’s DON’T.
HITMANCHON
Your such a fucken Redneck!
obvs kid has never been invited to a halloween costume party before anyway, i shall keep you abreast of the situation once hitman gets home from school.
i get loads of narsty nirvana comments ps. something about that band makes people cray cray territorial, competitive and possessive like come on, get past it already, who are you me in grade 6?
we drove to orillia yesterday and had beers on a patio, then we had beef jerky and doritos for dinner and went to the pbj show, it was pretty good, i thought they were drunk maybe.
i think i started to draw the world then got bored and had some ruffles and gingerale. you know, waspy snack attack.
my battery was dying so no these are not drunk fuck-up shots, arty pretentious or anything like that, i am not that cool.
as we were leaving the steamwhistle this chick goes to wendi where are you going wendi says to the kooks the girl goes, the gooks? then we, pitt especially, explode in laughter that lasted five minutes. (i look a little mangled in these pics)
doubt it, dicks who are dicks spend years refining themselves.
remember when i dreamed about pepsi and then i bought some? of course you do cos you think about me all the time.
you are going to love this HARD then hate me then LOVE me then gain four pounds.
anyway, i wish i could be one of those people who shuts up cos then i would have this massive entourage waiting for that special moment when i open my mouth and all passively say hey, and everyone nods furiously in agreement that they GET IT.
yeah people get mental when i show up and defend myself in their shit slinging forum
i DID feel like i was being watched that nite tho and normally i chalk it up to being self involved and crazy and fil never believes me when i say people are staring at me so
these geniuses get in a limo from the victory. THE VICTORY. A LIMO.
at this point i will mention that i have the brutalist fucking beer goggles in all of the lands i REALLY thought he looked like joaquin phoenix and i still do
