nxne photos i am a lazy ass – lee’s palace, last thursday
chicks on the right i know from gradeschool and highschool, the darkhair just got married and the other is engaged. everyone is either married, engaged, or has kids what is this the eighties? i am not surprised really, not to toot my own horn or anything but, i always felt the cool ones don’t marry until they absolutely must and the other ones can’t figure out anything else to do with their lives. sorry. no wait i meant it’s the love, the love!
anyway the one on the right i was more tight with, i said her name outside and before she even turned around she yelled SHUT UP. i have a very distinct and memorable voice. she’s a nurse and her fiance is a cop. weird!
guess who they were there to see?
blue rodeo. who didn’t go on ’til 3am GIRLS NITE OUT!
i was into that guy on the left he would be sitting on the side stairs smiling and then casually get up with a tambourine or some shakers do his thing then sit down for a bit then get up again and join the band.
see?
just throwin’ that one in there again in case you forgot.
if you want to see a totally unflattering picture of the girls i bumped into click here yes i am a dickhead and i will take it down once found out so enjoy full-on fluke blinking shot.
*you are yet again all ungrateful no one thanked me for that. sigh.
last nite watching cntm was stressful and after it was over i was like i am going to turn off my phone, but i didn’t, and no one called anyway. it’s not like we were ON the runway or anything you see my face several times, i’m glad and not glad that they didn’t include the stupid fat faces i made, maybe that’s why we weren’t in as much, i know i elbowed fil a couple times too. anyway thank fuck it’s over now we wait for youtube to stream it. sigh.
i’m putting these up to stop myself from watching more of last week’s cntm on youtube fil hurry and get home.
i told my whole family to watch me on tv tonite, no too busy, will you tape it? uh? NO. try at least pretending to care first. i just called to remind you to watch for me on tv and you tell me to tape it for you? that’s YOUR job i already did my part not to mention went on television for you to watch! i didn’t tell my mom though i figure she would ask me to tape it so i’m saving myself the annoyance. gonna file it under THE FAMILY DOESN’T CARE. what else is new.
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dear world
i have not seen one episode of (in no particular order):
watch canada’s next top model tonite me and fil are on it.
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gone pervy
more on fil’s pornoflickr of course. mine too i guess.
Ryan: did you blog anything what’s fundamentally revolutionary today or funny?
me: kinda
30 minutes later
Ryan: ok you were right i check yr blog like every time i check my email these days your name’s damn well an ad for it
me: yep
Ryan: i liked that face in the crowd bit i think it’s like part of yr job as an ex to make sure they don’t get over you probably a lame ego thing
me: yes totally, i am not friends with so many guys cos of their new girls its insane
Ryan: in a sense you could take that as a compliment
me: and even some of them like me and tolerate me but i sense the resentment and at some point there is always the talk where they tell me their feelings about me
Ryan: in that it sounds like those guys gave you glowing reviews gives the new bitches something to worry about you know?
me: yeah well mostly i treated them like garbage in the end and their peanut minds blocked that bit from their memory well my thing is all about MOVING ON not moving back in like other girls i know
Ryan: yeah goodcall
me: i guess having a blog up there for them to obsess over adds to it
Ryan: helps
me: and even dudes i was never intimate with their new ladies dont feel me
Ryan: sometimes i do miss the “friend” part of an ex-girlfriend but it’s worth it sometimes to watch the bridge burn down
me: generally most girls decide to not dig me, it’s been that way my whole life
Ryan: naw that’s just a girl-thing
me: it’s foreign to people, well dudes, like fil, who everyone likes, not to understand he thinks im just making it up
Ryan: girls seem to like you, i had an ex who did
me: yeah well they either hate me or fiercely dig me which is refreshing
Ryan: fiercely me: like protective
Ryan: yes well i wouldn’t feel too slighted probably this new girl saw buddy’s eyes light up at your name and then total-defence-warning-signals go off for them and they just wanna keep that slut away whereas if you weren’t anything to care about in the first place then wouldn’t they be like oh hey i’ve heard so much about you
me: yeah well im brazen i guess i totally busted his heart like three times so i guess she heard all about it
Ryan: i dunno the individual stories but if you can generalise it’s that people take sides, usually their own sides? with you it’s public cause yr blog but i’m small-town so it’s public too, you’re not one of those chicks who kisses one guy and eyes up another are ya? i know lately sometimes i think this girl i’ve been with is just wanting to broadcast it to like well her ex she was with for like 4 years so anyway it’s a turn-on but what i’m saying is i don’t understand women and their motives
me: i am loyal to my bf i do not fuck around
Ryan: sorry i didn’t mean an accusation i just don’t know you is all i just always suspected that like..if a girl says “i have a boyfriend” X amount of times, eventually it means i DON’T have a boyfriend not necessarily you
me: i never ever say bf
Ryan: yr blog should be evidence enough that you’re spoken for and happy that past lives need not haunt anyone
little children is spectacular. the narration, the story, the imagery and execution, if i had a dick it would be seeping right now. we have avoided renting cheating movies cos we just end up sitting there glaring at each other and accusing each other with our eyes, but i was at the movie store by myself yesterday without fil breathing down my neck to rent some piece of garbage like deja vu so i got what i wanted and i am so glad i did.
our movie projection jealousy is really something else, it’s endearing and cute and sweet, but i think i have created a monster in fil. i cuckoo’d my jealous onto him over two years ago kinda jokily and i’m i dunno more secure now i guess but he is totally two years ago me, adorable. well more like fat me without the fat. am i making sense?
anyway the movie is pretty heart-breaking, every character is flawed you cannot fully like them, there is a gross jerking-off scene too.
the duality between the cop who gets fired and the town pedophile is great and it is sad because the cop only realises his shortcomings too late.
jennifer connolly’s eyes, eyebrows and hair are just mental i cannot believe she is real.
how gay was i for saying execution?
you will want to strangle the fuck out of the one blond busybody park mother and you will need to find yourself a red bathingsuit like kate winslet’s.
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look how HUGE my cannons are!
thanks colin!
hi,
congratulations on being the first stranger to post a comment!
you are the winner of a hack caricature of yourself and cat:
me: i bought my dinner from the organic lesbian restaurant
Phil: nice does it taste like fish
me: they are filming another american pie around the corner
Phil: or carpet or box
me: oh its uh boring
Phil: or rug
me: i got u some spring rolls and soup someone took a bite of one i forget who oh the film crew is all out there
Phil: oh they must have slipped
me: they went quiet when i walked by
Phil: ok i will leave now
me: then on way back quiet again and one guy went on his walkie HOT GIRL and alerted all the other guys down the line
Phil: WHAT
me: so i had to walk by them all with sweaty arms and one goes hey you want to be in the movie i said
Phil: are u trying to make me angry
me: if i have to audition no way i said it really snarky i think they might have recognized me from last summer walking by all the time they are all old and ugly fil u have a hot girlfriend ok who is finally starting to feel better anout her appearance hello
Phil: i know i am joking sheesh
me: ok but yes it is funny
Phil: yes
me: like it is 33 out they are all hot and testy and bored and i made them feel better
Phil: you should get on the movie in whatever
me: yeah right they would make me audition
Phil: well you should at least ask
me: i was going to say yoy guys are making ANOTHER straight to dvd? i wasnt sure if they were serious
Phil: ok well tell me more when i get home
me: anyway ill walk by again sometime theyre gonna be there awhile thats everything
Phil: see u ok bye
me: bye oh some homeless sketch bag said i look fantastic no amazing fabulous? the point is he was on a blanket in front of the futon store
we made a deal that fil would get me a present if i grew out my nails, and i did successfully for 2 months, no biting, i held up MY end, did he? no. and now three of my little dudes have been ripped out. i am tired of repainting them and in general thinking about them and looking at how dirty they get and the shit that gets stuck beneath them the only good thing about them is how amazing a penis looks being held by them what i didn’t say that this place is rated G. anyway, fucking nails, fucking fil!
i think this flavour was invented for gin or vodka so we are saving it.
fil’s turkey meatloaf jail food.
if you can believe it i finally sorted through the box of my shit my dad gave me two months ago, it was like final straw go through it day lest fil come home switch contacts for glasses and turn into MEAN FIL then the nite is fucking RUINED.
i have some stuff i don’t want and won’t sell i mean you can have it i am not paying for shipping well for the one thing i can it is a fake gucci wallet the other is a trinket box i put stickers and nail polish all over when i was cuckoo, i bought it in LA i’ll take pics of them later.
it’s so fucking hot.
i am going for a tan later, my ass crack was peeling for awhile there. i found my elton john cd and best of crazy michael jackson hello itunes.
last nite was sober nite as well as back to back episodes of hell’s kitchen how stressful is that show! and the fat asian crybaby, breaks my HEART! fil got mad at me feeling sad for him.
all my new/old junk spread throughout the condo cid is visitting it all and trying to bury it in the floor holy get a life.
oh wait awesome he just stuffed himself into this tiny plastic papers and pens basket one that would be on a desk in an office, quite shallow, i’ll show you a picture.
there’s all this shit in it too, my highschool diploma and keys and little things i think it will be his new favourite place to party. like time-out land.
