Author Archives: raymi
my left eye got soap in it when i wasn’t paying attention tho my bath was awhile ago and all of a sudden the soap is like MAKE YOURSELF KNOWN. come to think of it now i might have just put laundry detergent in my eye out of excitement over the new washers FRONT LOADING!
guess which genius i will be capturing on canvas next…
the moral of the story is i just discovered a fashion zit on the right apple-part of my cheek.
me: i want a sour cream gun the one they use at taco bell
just a heads up
Phil: um ok menses
me: im serious
im googling it right now
Phil: the sour cream gun?
why
what for
me: SOUR CREAM
im on taco bell’s website
you’d think they would have a picture of it
Phil: ok sour cream fiend whats the big deal with the gun
you want to eat sour cream straight from the gun?
me: i like how it makes the sour cream taste better and like cake icing, the piping around a cake
i am picturing myself shooting that into my mouth
Phil: um no it doesn’t make it taste better
the stuff they use isn’t real
it’s modified so it tastes better
but is a billion times worse for you
me: yeah i know that but i dont care i want that device
i would put other stuff in it too
like
uh
sour cream
thats all i really want
Phil: boy i am hungry for taco bell now thanks so much
me: seriously lets drive to mississauga to eat taco bell then go home and feel fat for the rest of the nite
Phil: no thank you
i dont want it that badly
actually the more i think about it, at all
me: ok
well a gun like that would be awesome
then u wouldnt need forks or spoons anymore
Phil: yes true
me: u could shoot your omellete out of it
or a steak
yum
haha
ew
Phil: but you would feel obliged to eat lots of whatever you happend to have in it
like ground beef
or blended bacon
me: well just put one portion in it one meal
Phil: or peanut butter and jam swirl
me: butter chicken
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
ew peanutbutter
Phil: ew blended meat dishes is gross thanks
me: ok fine
sourcream sandwiches
Phil: beef shake, extra thick and creamy
me: ok barf
Phil: yep i win
me: im picturing going over to say samirs house for dinner and he has a few gun meals prepared
Phil: like what
me: and the host is always in charge of shooting the gun into yer mouth
Phil: this is giving me indigestion btw
me: doesnt matter just the idea of that being the way people eat in the future
Phil: scallops
me: you have to stand three feet away
kind of like homer’s make-up shotgun for marge
Phil: right yes
me: and you just get blasted in the face an entire meal all at once
that would be an interesting way to die
Phil: that wouldn’t be enjoyable
me: ok ill shut up now obvs i havent eaten anything today yet
Phil: you need to chew and savour
what will we eat then
yo?!
me: NACHOS
AND THAT CONCLUDES ANOTHER ONE OF RAYMI’S CRAVINGS!
CRAZY TYRA WINFREY
a little difficult to watch
TYRA IS A FUCKING BITCH
LEARN FROM THIS cos she cares! “when my mother yells at me like this it’s because she loves me!!” ???
penelope cruz is going to play me in a movie and the movie will be about doing laundry and sighing a lot while having a laundry basket on her hip and there will be wacky spanish humor oh wait is that a movie about her life? i am going back to bed cos i am too retarded for this world right now i have been awake since 5:41am.
also this woman is what i aspire to be after my good ole blogging days are over i can’t decide which hat i like the best
her captions are pretty amazing also
I imaged a frog and knit it.
but, I modelled it on a frog and was not able to knit it.
It is failure.
etienne’s matt good buzznet fotos
On the night before the burial, Cathey’s wife Katherine refused to leave the body, and played songs on her laptop that reminded her of her husband.
i cannot stop looking at this photo and reading the caption. even my period is crying.
Hey raymi. I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your blog, and it is not just because of the boob pics. I have depression and sever social anxiety that has kept me inside my house for about 4 years now. Its sad, but the Internet is my life and you are a no bullshit light in this cyber world for me.
I love how you speak your mind with no apologies.
I have a blog as well if you want to check it out It is not the greatest, but I try.
I am always looking for friends online and would like to invite you into my world.
I know you get a million emails a day, but I just wanted to say hello and hopefully correspond with you sometime.
Stay smart, crazy and beautiful.
Michael
AKA
Bubba Nosferatu
