bridget jones is on and i hate mark darcy’s girlfriend/fiance, natasha, i want to throw her down some stairs. friday nite i learned that i can never ever watch forest gump again, the older my ovaries get the more of a blubbering mess i become on the couch crying into my vodka. i just weeped a bit in the bathroom from thinking about the part in almost famous where the young journalist tells the guy who is leaving with his sister to take care of her in san francisco. i’m sorry if you can’t handle it if my blog is about feelings now, and thinking about stuff in movies that made me cry. oh don’t forget the part in bridget jones at dinner with her friends and mark darcy is there and her gay friend says we like bridget just as she is and she looks at mark oh siiiiiiiigh yes i cried then too.

when this coffee kicks in we can discuss this further if you want.

lets talk about parts in movies that make us cry in my comments forever.

oh one more thing it’s on A&E so everything is censored and at the part where she tells hugh grant she’s quitting she says she would rather wash saddam hussein’s cars, that’s what was chosen to cover up a swear word! fil said they may as well have said n-words and j-word’s cars.

and you know those cheesy posters that say THINGS I LEARNED IN LIFE… and then the age of the person then something about eating vegetables or lying in a field of grass, dentist’s like to hang them on their walls for you to read when you are waiting for them, anyway, i have one:

THE MORE YOU TELL PEOPLE YOU DON’T DRINK JAGERMEISTER, THE MORE THEY FORCE IT ON YOU AT A BAR, AND THE MORE YOU END UP DRINKING IT. -raymi esquire. (oh and then you say goldschlager instead, which just means they think you mean mix it with jager! fuck i can’t believe i spelled goldschlager right the first time, that’s a bad sign maybe.)

i’m glad my hits are lowest on sundays, it’s going to get retarded.

oh and if you were at the cloak and dagger last nite, i’m sorry, sorry if you don’t understand that i am lord of the dance!

here’s a FAME TIP for the girls, if you can see gays impersonating you in drag, then you will be a success. if you don’t see that happening, change careers.

ps.
HOW TO NOT WRITE A SHITTY BLOG POST (questions to consider) just to refresh your memories.