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do as i say not as i do

Hey gang,

So lets talk about the Grammys and just be like everybody else for once.

We will talk about me and we will talk about the Grammys, the Gram-me’s.

And how about that Kanye holy stupid fuck! Maybe if you were drunk with your hilarious friends at a pool party all in Hawaiian shirts and like Norm Macdonald gets up and takes the podium at a roast, FANTASTIC yes, appropriate. Basically that scene from Billy Madison.

However, part of me is like fuck the Grammys who cares? Do any of us know anyone remotely near as famous as Taylor Swift and Beyonce?

Do you know how much my socks were not blown off by the album she snuck up and dropped on us last year? Just as much as those puppies stayed up and on all last night from her Biblical gospel I am Jesus performance. Well Beyonce you may have fooled Kanye but not this girl! (btw I love gospel music fyi).

Maybe sing a song that has rhythm and flow that you can actually navigate with this “talent” you have. You tried too hard to make a moment happen. We shouldn’t have to wait 2 minutes to be grabbed by something. It was all build. It was f-ing without c___ing.

I liked your body silhouette and matching men in white accompaniments but Beck has been at it longer. You can’t win ‘em all and you don’t. It’s a part of life.

I don’t purport to know about awards shows or how winners are chosen but it seems that some other higher power governing body is in place much like your God you duly believe in, yet you can’t accept the room of little white men deciding decisions. Or is it based on record sales as well as popular opinion?

Anyway I don’t care. Pretty sure no one else OTHER THAN KANYE WEST rushes stages when they don’t like the outcome but mostly because we don’t get invited to those things and have the opportunity to.

Here’s something else I noticed, when Jennifer Hudson got up on stage to deliver some horribly read piece about this well, she stopped at the top of the stage and this little white old man he like, shoved her over and it really pissed me off. Here is this exquisite songstress in a beautiful white dress and she froze, she was still poised and all but I did not like how he did that it was so typical awkward insecure tiny man who felt more entitled and important than her and I am surprised no one else has pointed it out yet. Watch it for yourself and see. I just mean, if that happened to me I would have thumped his arm or pinched him super hard and painfully. I would visibly react. Jennifer Hudson played that moment cool though. Maybe tumblr is talking about it they notice everything.

Should I tweet come-on to Kanye West next?

In moments like these, social media opportunities, or maybe like everyday, I just splatter as many people as I can with stupid crap everywhere and see what sticks. You would be surprised!

People will care about celebrities more than they will ever care about me, eventually I am gonna have to bite the bullet and stop trying to be the one and to talk about the one instead.

But no!

I can do both.

See. I relate to the megalomania so much, I am smarter than her. People love the fame and you reinforce it with every gaudy fancy sexy glittery photo you post. There is a recipe. We all get it right and wrong. The object is to always be the focus (which they always are). Do I troll you guys? Sometimes maybe.

I refrain from using a filter sometimes. Some people think that mentally ill people are the only ones who do that. Maybe it is a form of autism but when one is actively cognitive of the shitty things they say, and I mean shitty, sometimes I can deliver some real honest harsh zingers and be separated from the cruelty affixed and I am doing this with logic and reason. My mind makes quick calculated conclusions in the moment before I speak, everyone knows the saying think before you speak. Some people act and think later. Some (many)(all) tweet then delete, Jason Biggs comes to mind. In the moment I am thinking that this person will only benefit from what I am about to say. I have a way.

-note to self do celebrity hall of shame tweets blog post round up or get someone better to.

Anyway the point of many is, does Kanye think before he acts?

Do I provoke purposely without thinking?

How can it not be on purpose if I have thought about it.

Sometimes I’ll post a mega juicy sexy ass pic then like throw my phone away and agonize over it secretly quietly in the back of my mind while watching Banshee. Flee the fear and know that it’s for the greater good because it will all add up to, something someday?

Then there is the dreaded like-hike obsession. If there are no likes does it mean it’s bad when you tried really hard to look good in the picture? And then why do your friends only like the pics that are not of your butt but like everything else, are they being passive aggressive? Just chill with the obvious silences and don’t ask because you don’t want to know.

Sometimes I’ll say one of my dumb things on Facebook instead of twitter and it will get all these likes and comments. Say the same thing on twitter and, crickets. Twitter is good like that sometimes though.

Every single one of us desires attention.

It’s funny how Iggy’s hair was judged by the universe from lazy couch slobs with awful hair themselves. Personally, I loved her hairdo and it takes courage to go out when you’re bullied by the industry cos they jealous of you and attack you for “stealing” from their culture. Some people just identify as a certain way. Do you bash transgender people for identifying as a different gender, well how about race? What if I woke up one day and decided I was Swedish?

People can be and do anything they want and if they do it better than you, beat you to it, so what? Play better then. Cos you just look like a whiner.

Like how we look like whiners always whining about how unfair it is that Kanye West does this, does that and his stupid wife too. I have gone back and forth defending her so many times meanwhile look at me. I am using her as a scapegoat left right center!

Oh well keep the dream alive.

I don’t have anything interesting to share other than trashing on the Grammys. Aside from dying my hair and my exercises and boring you with what I am not eating right now.

Running on the spot indoors works well in the winter. When all your stuff be jiggling it be working. I hold onto my chest and do army style leg-ups (pretending to know what that is). Lots of kettlebell too, I do bicep curls with it. This one is heavy.

Green tea is important these days also.

Went through some jewelry yesterday that my mom gave me awhile ago. She is so sweet.

I took a lot in this get-up I’ll save for my next post I don’t want Grammy people seeing how ridiculous I am more than necessary.

Can you tell I’m dying on the inside? No? Ok good. jkjkjkjk jeez

Have a nice day!

Update, this:

Norm follows me now why don’t you?

6 thoughts on “do as i say not as i do

  1. I can’t believe he did this again – actually, I kind of wished that he went all the way to say his bit and make himself look like an even bigger ass. I have no idea what Beck’s album sounded like nor have a listened to Beyonce’s, but they’re voted on by a team of their peers. So if Kanye doesn’t like it, he can keep his mouth shut because people will be less likely to vote for him next time he’s nominated. Anyway, Beck hasn’t aged at all. WTF?

  2. Raymi 1. You vs. Kim K. is an unfair fight that I want to see and 2. My boner just asked me to call Chas Bono to find out how to give it its own penis because you look so good.

  3. Raymi,
    “Flee the fear and know that it’s for the greater good because it will all add up to, something someday?”

    Your propensity for splattering and glitter bombing as many people as you can with stupidly awesome crap everywhere and seeing what sticks is what makes you far more brave, intelligent, and savvy than many celebrities who generally have a lot of production money backing them and no sense of raw fearlessness.
    Also, the blue underwear with the little bow…solid choice!

  4. omfg

    “Kanye is ‘fighting for creativity’? It took 68 people to make that Beyonce record. Beck wrote his entire album and played every instrument.”

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