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the blond heard round the world

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5431721193/

hey internet lets do this! here i am yesterday sitting at the piano before we went out to eat at chap’s. i love chap’s. it’s a dump trapped in 1990, it’s texican. that isn’t even a word! amazing! if you want to look like me just sit in front of a light source. insta-soft lighting youth making flaw erasing.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432330574/in/photostream/

i put this on facebook and now i cant get anything done. i call this the norma jean. the look’s foundation of which being mega blond and manipulative sweater number 5, all american wholesome goodness. where is my crock pot? bought an elfin belt.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5431721465/in/photostream/

see i tinted my eyebrows. my face looks fat here cos it’s taken from below slightly. yeah yeah wah wah too hard on myself. bleh.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5431721565/in/photostream/

totally neurotic photo taking day. nothing is good enough. phone wasn’t co-operating. i haven’t downloaded my camera pics yet so we’ll see how that went. always a mystery surprise.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5431721689/in/photostream/

my northern masturbating forest spider’s layer offering. pink grapefruit perrier. uber anorexia girl greyhounds. ROLE MODEL INFLUENCER BASTION OF HEALTH. no problem chase it down with peach blend applesauce. zero fat. matches my nail polish. actually the american wants to stop drinking. when he has kids. he wants to have kids. give it two years and i think i’m ready. little raymis. before any asshole tries to come at me with please don’t reproduce bullshit, actually, i am mega-maternal. my shit is quite together. yeah i am a case right now but that’s cos i am a planner, long term planning right now. in two years i will be ready to fly a jet or something.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432331042/in/photostream/

two dollar panties from h&m. love the $1 this or that. yeah i totally need this wild retarded fucking thing yes i do. i am the fun parent.

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tomorrow i am going to be a waif, this is my last hurrah of my menstruation.

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i bought this for my outfit for tomorrow. a onesie jumper. the last one. i also bought a red flower clutch rose styled for me, that pink hat (the reason i went in there in the first place) and a nice red silk shirt. oh a khaki skirt too. i decided not to spend $200 on one dress instead i spent $160 on an assortment of things. mini-panic attack at the cashier averted. that and the table (the only thing i want to spend time with right now) this month no more blowing money.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432331358/in/photostream/

nice gameshow hair much. veronica corningstoner. hi rose! scooped her from brennen today.

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also channeling christina applegate married with children era oh man that’s two c. applegate looks in a day. lets see if i can do it again.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432331580/in/photostream/

maje transformation in the works over there.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432331756/in/photostream/

this is the orig moment when i saw kelly bundy. now this lighting, not too sure about it. i am kinda digging my older sunken eyes (hahah thats so funny to say in my head or to declare) and the older seasoned thing. sometimes only though.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432331874/in/photostream/

housewife desperation bangs.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432331984/in/photostream/

arrived like this. i stopped a streetcar today. it’s true ask my colleague. it was on king street and i was going to jay walk (that’s right) and i had no problem waiting for the streetcar to pass me before breaking the law but he full on halts it to check me out, i am always prepared for this shit, you slink into fuckin owning it sultry cosmopolitan reading self entitled oblivious mode, cannot be avoided. don’t say you wouldn’t.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432332066/in/photostream/

tired and checking myself out. man it’s like i am self obsessed or something right?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5431722943/in/photostream/

texican heaven. i almost stole the hot sauce, i would if it weren’t so vinegary. the service pissed me off. miss-communication is all.my dad wanted to avoid a scene so he walked over to the kitchen and asked why my shrimp was taking so long. they decided to put it altogether for some reason. i sat for half an hour watching my dad eat his soup.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5431722999/in/photostream/

after the glory what was cafetaste’s high end onion soup, looking at this abomination was humorous. dad how was it? i’m tracy morgan I CAN’T EAT THIS I’MA FOODIE! tracy morgan voice. halarious.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5432332312/in/photostream/

i dressed like an aladdin ninja prickhead.

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tired and stressed out before bed.

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this was a wonderful evening.

come to the hideout tomorrow and bid on me and check back here (here, down here, right here)(HERE) in an hour or so i’ll link to my mission statement on who i think my biggest competition is and what i have to offer. the american is considering bidding by phone for me. do they do that? i’ll ask.

17 thoughts on “the blond heard round the world

  1. i can’t believe, why do you keep on telling people that you are related to jack kerouac when you are not?

  2. shouldn’t you be studying right now nerd student loner in a library at 8 o’clock at night. you are spending a lot of money on an education, step to it kid. here’s your first lesson, spend less time focusing on other people, and more time perfecting your own thing. follower.

  3. You eat everything delicious and are still thin…how woman, how???!!!!?

    Please don’t say vomit. I work out too. Do you just take pictures of food you eat just a bit of? Does God love you more than me. Please explain.

    a.

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