our hell is a good life

EYE SMILE TIME

alright so if you are driving in your car and your arm is out the window, is that for my benefit? not being your passenger, i mean, i’m on the sidewalk and i see you roll up in your whatever the fuck mobile and your wrist is sticking out like that, where do i send the thank you for letting me know you are a cool mother effer note?

this was funnier in my head two nites ago before i fell asleep, anyway, hang tight there’s more.

so like, ugh, i can’t even finish this.

you actually achieve the opposite of the desired result in hanging your goddamn arm out your window, you look like a wiener, you do not look like the stereotypical and universal image of cool when you do that (black ray bans, grease-style white t-shirt, pack of smokes tucked in the sleeve), you look like a little kid actually on your first day out of the house after a week of being grounded. also, don’t make eye contact with me, it’s awkward, i don’t want you to know that i acknowledged your arm and its intentional FORCED attempt at casualty, please stop.

you are only allowed to jam your arm out the window if you are the passenger and a feeling of euphoria overcomes you riding down country dirt roads and santana is blasting out the speakers and you do that magic carpet ride arm fighting the wind thing so that cars behind you can know that you are the most whimsical traveler ever.

also hello, driving with one arm is dangerous.

sorry for the harsh, i’m just trying to help here people.