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so i dressed in my slutty ms. claus outfit for my neice and told her that i worked parttime for santa claus and she believed every word of my speech and i told her that it has to be kept a secret and i said that i would tell her all about the north pole someday and she said YOU’VE BEEN THERE!? it was adorable. i said santa couldn’t make it but he wanted me to wish her a very merry christmas and he knew that she was a very good girl and very smart and pretty bla bla bla.

then i hit more of that xmas sauce.

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