free hit counter

it’s been’erwhile

i have these saved going back to july i can’t even remember half the burns i made up when i chose them, so be gentle.


this just inspired me to make a video response so you can see what my face looks like right now. yes agreed, it is way horrible that you only felt validated as a person when your mentally ill buddy CUT THEMSELF OVER HOW MUCH OF AN ASSHOLE YOU WERE TO THEM and now that they are better your flattery high has been taken away. next time i hope your pal becomes a drinker instead and gets over you forever.


WHEEEE! FUN! LETS ALL RACE TO THE FRIENDSHIP AWARD CEREMONY DON’T LOLLY-GAG I THINK YOU ARE UP FOR AN AWARD THIS TIME FOR SUREZIES!


oh sigh, but you know a lot of people go through life constantly beating themselves with confusion sticks over why they can’t ever please their parents when really the solution can actually be that simple, how arrogant to believe that it’s impossible for a parent to hate their child. be free l’il duder and enjoy it, that’s the best revenge showing her you don’t give a fuck anymore about anything she has to say ever again.


how completely awesome, a sociopathic attention-seeking testing-type, you know you were supposed to stop panty-waist friendship tests in grade 6? did you know that? did you also know that you get the opposite desired result when you test people? hopefully you will blast through the windshield into a tree and become paralyzed for life then you will see how much of a selfish shitlick you are.


are you that much of a miserable cunt that you have to inflict cowardly torture on innocent people? um if you hate your job you know you can change occupations. get some friends and a life, maybe? you should be forced to fellate a toilet brush.


you know there are other conniving ways to force your ex to talk to you (though totally mental to obsess over someone who doesn’t want anything to do with you anymore) not involving fake pregnancies and STDs like burning your name in gasoline in his backyard or breaking into his house sitting on the edge of his bed and watching him sleep. w-i-n-n-e-r.


ok i did that once before too but i at least know how to spell masturbate. please do me a favour, go to dictionary.com and type in masterbate (PUKE) and see what happens. the only reason masterbate comes up in google is b’cos more than half of the world’s population spells it wrong and google just gave the fuck up and allowed it to lead to the ‘masturbate’ term. UGH! GET IT RIGHT! not only did you make me picture you masturbating, you made me picture a stupid fucking idiot masturbating THANK YOU SO MUCH.


YOU ARE HILARIOUS! i can’t even tell if i am being sarcastic right now.


barf at wipe, and barf at lover. the fact that he is married makes me so much less enraged. great! this is almost too pathetic for words, you know he’s using you right and that he doesn’t think of you when he wipes his asshole at home with his wife and kids?


aw too cute, sad, but cute.


wow green-eyed monster much? holy do you ever deserve to be throttled the hell out of for that. make your own fame dick.


and you are proud of this? why do people like you keep popping up WHAT IS GOING ON WORLD!??!


aw me too! i probably have more feelings for inanimate objects than i do humans, mostly kidding, but you know what i mean. like a balloon in the sky could break my heart or a picture of a red scarf hahaha.


i understand you are in the wrong profession.


BEST SHAPED HEAD ON A KID AWARD GOES TO THIS GUY! omfg and his face, PUNCH ME PLEASE!


yeah, and it’s called schizophrenia medication.


uh, grow up maybe and get on with your own life or confront her. does it paralyze you at night, do you sleep with a blanky called binky?


find a way to tell him soon. as teachers age they inevitably (generally) lose the joy of teaching, they get drained, give him a reason to keep on chugging and inspire more kids. teaching is probably the most important job in the universe.


you will get yourself back don’t worry. hey what is this gay day on my blog?


good! good! good! good! good! i don’t know what else to say.


also very important work!


when that happens you will take this back big time. someone wrote below this post card that their tattoo can’t talk to them or hug them and they would give anything to not have it. why not get a tattoo of something else you ding dong poseur.


you know what else would make you feel better about being overweight?

NOT BEING OVERWEIGHT!


oh god get over it, it’s not her fault just like it’s not your fault, blame her for more things why don’t you. I GOT DUMPED COS MY BEST FRIEND HAS A POOL AND I DON’T!


that is SOOOOOOO fucking endearing i am going to explode now.


right, cos it’s ABBA’s fault and nothing at all to do with the fifty cats you own and the cathy comics wallpapering your apartment. i love abba and i have a bf in fact i’ll make raymi waterloo dance video right now.

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